ferroxfluidgargoyle

Latest Posts by ferroxfluidgargoyle

When I was little, my mom would take the eyes she cut out of the jack-o-lantern and use toothpicks to stick them in the top like ears to make me a little kittied cat. You, too, can do this. Godspeed and good luck.

Pocky day 11/11 🐇🐺

abandonment issues slayyyy

i hope all video game devs go on strike. not just the writers and actors.

We can't jerk off or ibuprofen our way out of this one fellas

Lol

You'd think dwarves would have a toxic masculinity problem, but they don't.

They're resistant to toxins, you see.

I'm okay with being observed and perceived, but being interpreted is where I draw the fucking line

- blonde

- bounty hunter

- transgender

- in a fighting game

- was a big deal when it was revealed she was a woman

you are good even when you are unemployed.

you are good even when you need to rely on others’ help.

you are good even when you are depressed.

you are good even when you are hurt.

you are good even when you are scared.

you are good even when you are overwhelmed.

you are good even when you are not tidy.

you are good even when you are confused.

you are good even when you have difficulty performing tasks.

you are good even when you feel like you’ll never measure up to being an adult.

symptoms are not morality.

i hate nerves and anxiety. oh nooo i am scared of acting like a weird bitch to remedy this i will act like a weird bitch

If tumblr is getting rid of reblog chains and other tumblr specific stuff then how will people make funny conversational posts that get reposted to Twitter and get hundreds of thousands of likes?

Staff, you do realize that the weird uniqueness of tumblr is what draws outsiders to it in the first place, right? When I came here from Twitter a couple of months ago do you know how long it took me to get adjusted? One day. One day was all it took to figure out tags and reblog chains and whatever and appreciate it more than all of the other sites I use.

Nobody wants tumblr to be Twitter. Not even people who have literally only ever used Twitter.

Don’t forget the first victims when you go see Oppenheimer this opening weekend. Unforgivable not to include them in the narrative.

We love us some Nolan and Cillian but this is also a story that should never have taken place.

For further reading:

This is what happens when the US government goes nuclear-crazy during the Cold War and mines a shit ton of uranium. Lambs born with three legs and no eyes, and human stillbirths and agonizing deformities for those that survive. For decades it was referred to as a Navajo-specific hereditary illness. No one made the link to the mines and the drinking water.

sometimes ur only closure is knowing that u had a good intentions and a good heart

The best part about Star Citizen is that you get to enjoy the food of the future

THE DOUBLE DOG

depression or whatever is soooo embarrassing oops i ruined a large chunk of my future because i just didn’t feel like doing anything for a while . Epic Cringe babe...

reblog if u like titties

do you guys think jesus was hung

caramel frappe give me the strength to clean my room

Last week I accidentally took an edible at 10x my usual dose. I say “accidentally” but it was really more of a “my friend held it out to my face and I impulsively swallowed it like a python”, which was technically on purpose but still an accident in that my squamate instincts acted faster than my ability to assess the situation and ask myself if I really wanted to get Atreides high or not.

Anyway. I was painting the wall when it hit. My friend heard me make a noise and asked what was wrong—I explained that I had just fallen through several portals. I realized that painting the wall fulfilled my entire hierarchy of needs, and was absolutely sure that I was on track to escaping the cycle of samsara if I just kept at it a little longer. I was thwarted on my journey towards nirvana only by the fact that I ran out of paint.

Seeking a surrogate act of humble service through which I might be redeemed and made human, I turned to unwashed dishes in the sink and took up the holy weapon of the sponge. I was partway through cleaning the blender when it REALLY hit.

You ever clean a blender? It’s a shockingly intimate act. They are complex tools. One of the most complicated denizens of the kitchen. Glass and steel and rubber and plastic. Fuck! They’ve got gaskets. You can’t just scrub ‘em and rinse them down like any other piece of shit dish. You’ve got to dissemble them piece by piece, groove by sensitive groove, taking care to lavish the spinning blades with cautious attention. There’s something sensual about it. Something strangely vulnerable.

As I stood there, turning the pieces over in my hands, I thought about all the things we ask of blenders. They don’t have an easy job. They are hard laborers taking on a thankless task. I have used them so roughly in my haste for high-density smoothies, pushing them to their limits and occasionally breaking them. I remembered the smell of acrid smoke and decaying rubber that filled the kitchen in the break room the last time I tried to make a smoothie at work—the motor overtaxed and melted, the gasket cracked and brittle. Strawberry slurry leaked out of it like the blood of a slain animal.

Was this blender built to last? Or was it doomed to an early grave in some distant landfill by the genetic disorder of planned obsolescence? I didn’t know, and was far too high to make an educated guess. But I knew that whatever care and tenderness and empathy I put into it, the more respect for the partnership of man and machine, the better it would perform for me.

This thought filled me with a surge of affection. However long its lifespan, I wanted it to be filled with dignity and love and understanding. I thought: I bet no one has hugged this blender before. And so I lifted it from its base.

A blender is roughly the size and shape of a human baby. Cradling one in your arms satisfies a primal need. A month ago I was permitted to hold an infant for the first time in my life, an experience which was physically and psychologically healing. I felt an echo of that satisfaction holding my friend the blender, and the thought of parting with it felt even more ridiculous than bringing it with me to hang out on my friend’s bed.

Ain't nothing wrong with chubby stomachs.

You like the piggy tails Sir? 🎀🧸

currently trying to design a character that looks like they'd be obsessed with Homestuck.

I have not read any Homestuck whatsoever

I spent so much of my life romanticizing the Great and Powerful Enormity of the Sea, reading about the salt and the sweat of the sailors straining to haul the sails or anchor while dreading the monsters in the cold, icy deep fathoms below…and now you tell me that a fathom is only 6 feet deep -

what is this, a fourth grade classroom?

justin stewart