I Couldn’t Sleep Until I Drew This

so, its about time i get my own friendgroup of obsessive, academic, generally like minded people and we all end up falling in love with each other in various semi-tragic combinations, and maybe someone ends up dead but its ok it was for the aesthetic

at some point you have to realize that you actually have to read to understand the nuance of anything. we as a society are obsessed with summarization, likely as a result of the speed demanded by capital. from headlines to social media (twitter being especially egregious with the character limit), people take in fragments of knowledge and run with them, twisting their meaning into a kaleidoscope that dilutes the message into nothing. yes, brevity is good, but sometimes the message, even when communicated with utmost brevity, requires a 300 page book. sorry.

Gertrude: Where have you all been?!

Hamlet: Oh, just out dealing with things way beyond our maturity level.

the relationship between wlw and their fictional male fav who sucks extremely bad but lives in their mind anyways is extremely complex and can’t be explained

FUCK

self-destruction doesn’t always look like taking too many pills or cutting your skin open. sometimes it’s drinking coffee when you know caffeine gives you panic attacks. sometimes it’s crossing the street without looking both ways. sometimes it’s showering with the water a little too hot. sometimes it’s avoiding eye contact with your reflection in the mirror or ridiculing your problems rather than addressing them. sometimes it’s walking out without sunscreen in scorching heat and not wearing enough when it’s freezing out. self destruction isn’t always physical mutilation, mostly it’s masked as little things so never assume what someone may be going through just bc they don’t show you visible signs of suffering.

Dumbass Academia: A Concept

Making snarky jokes when someone asks what you plan to do with your major

Ex: “My real life plan is to marry rich and become a wealthy widow at a young age. College is just a pickup scene.” 

Getting used to various mystery stains on all your books/essays/papers 

Is it food? Is it a water stain from reading in the bathtub? Is it tears? Were you annotating the book and some ink blotted up? Who knows? Certainly not you, better read around it. 

Speaking of annotating books: Underlining all the bad words 

This is especially fun if it’s something more “high brow” like a poetry book

Your glasses (if you wear them) are somehow always either dirty or scratched. You can’t see with them off, but you can’t see all that well with them on either. 

You have a book. You want to read the book. It is highly recommended. It’s supposed to be very good. It will allow your mind to grow. It may even have a deep meaning or important historical significance that you really care about absorbing. Alas, neither your brain nor your heart has room for new characters to love or new obsessions to fixate on. You read fanfiction instead. 

Finding a way to justify pretty much anything you like as part of your preferred aesthetics

Ex: “The show Rick and Morty totally counts as dark academia because it heavily involves science and education and also because gay stuff happens in it.”

Ex: “Wearing black lipstick is totally within the realm of cottagecore because there are black flowers and good rich dirt is often black and there are black nights with beautiful shining stars. 

Correcting people about small errors on an impulse and then realizing two days later that they were actually right. 

Writing things in code and posting them randomly online

(If I get to 150 followers on this blog I will be doing that btw)

Posting stuff or saying stuff and pretending that you don’t care about people’s opinions on what you say because you’re in this for you but secretly anytime you get a notification you almost cry because you’re so excited 

Using old beat up notebooks and any pens you can get your hands on because you don’t have the time or money for fancy stationary 

Being a little pretentious and doing things purely For The Aesthetic but then ten minutes later you’re eating mac and cheese and watching cartoons in the bathtub because being elitist is fun but it takes so much time and effort 

Having a lot of mottos but none of them actually really apply to you but you insist that they are in fact what you base your life on anyway. Sometimes they like, half apply? But never all the way

Ex: “Be gay do crime”

Were you a gifted kid who didn’t quite fit in with everyone else in the gifted program’s intellectual strong suits? Or a gifted kid who now feels like you’ve become completely mediocre/average? You fit in

Alternatively were you a student who wasn’t considered one of the “smart” kids and even may have been treated like you were dumb and/or less than other students because you didn’t connect to your schooling “the correct way”? You fit in too

Constantly changing your aesthetic because something else seems cool

You read those “tea or coffee?” things and scoff because who can decide? 

Going feral over abandoned buildings for no reason

Making bad jokes that most other people don’t get because they’re about really niche topics 

Whenever someone asks you about a book you’re reading or what you’re studying you panic and say something nonsensical 

Coming up with or researching conspiracy theories, but more about small local things like why there are never major storms in your town than big conspiracies like the moon landing 

Not that you can’t also be into the big conspiracy theories

Being either ridiculously emotional all the time or being completely devoid of emotions all the time. 

🌾serf03 Follow she swinks on my pikeshaft afore i crow gardyloo

👑lord-williams Follow utter hogwash. banished from my domain

🌾serf03 Follow alas

“I want to remain an eternal mystery to myself and others.” - King Ludwig II of Bavaria

you guys have no idea of how much I daydream about time travel

*Lemony Snicket voice* The word ‘poison’ here can mean many things. ‘Poison’ may literally refer to the presence of an unwashed llama in a stream from which a nearby village likely collects its drinking water. Likewise, it may figuratively refer to the effect of greed and isolation on the priorities of a young ruler, or the machinations of a villainous royal advisor on the health and wellbeing of said young ruler. In this case, however, ‘poison’ most literally refers to the poison, the poison for Kuzco, the poison chosen especially to kill Kuzco, Kuzco’s poison… That poison.