Johnathan Harker - Blog Posts

My good friend Johnathan Harker is going on a business trip tomorrow hopefully nothing horrible will happen and he'll enjoy the lovely views of Transylvania in peace.

My good friend Johnathan Harker is once again having paprika induced nightmares

Ah yes. This is my good friend johnathan and his wife Mina and her wife Lucy and her three husbands

Man just read the May 16th update and BOOKED IT to tumblr gotta talk to my girlies about our bestie johnathan harker and the fat crush Dracula has on him

look im loving dracula daily as much as the next person but i am absolutely LOOSING MY SHIT over how the castle is described in the book, especially the may 5th update. 

If you didn’t know, Dracula’s castle is/based on the real place Bran’s Castle in Romania.

Guys this castle is on a fucking cliff.

Johnathan described his arrival at castle drac as having a courtyard “of considerable size”, and right as he exited the carriage, being right next to the entrance. 

You want to know what the ACTUAL entrance of Bran’s castle looks like???

FUCKING. THIS.

ITS A STEAP ASS STAIRCASE 

NO COURTYARD IN SITE

Honestly there’s probably an issue regarding his super fancy octagonal room next to a dining hall but I don’t care enough to analyze blueprints and photos of the castle’s interior to find out.

So I’ve gotten back into Dracula recently. Vampire Johnathan Harker was taking up space in my brain and I had to get him out.

i sure hope my good friend johnathan harker has a safe trip...

It is a relief to note that I am not the only one worried by the lack of a letter on this day

No word from my good friend Johnathan today. Given the state of affairs in his last letter I find myself quite concerned. Perhaps it is unkind of me to judge so harshly on second hand impressions but I do not like the sound of this Count Dracula fellow at all.

If the Dracula cast had social media (shudders)

Dracula - Closeted webtoon reader, also likes BitLife and maybe he’d post the most unfunniest memes to the discord server that just has the Dracula cast in it.

Johnathan - Instagram filled with food pics + life blog/vlogger (I AM LIVING WITH AN ACTUAL VAMPIRE IN HIS SPOOKY CASTLE ((NOT CLICKBAIT)))

Mina - Audiobook youtuber, she’d have the best voice for it and she sure as hell could voice dramatic scenes well #girlboss + maybe a Facebook page with cute photos of her and Johnathan and a LOT of her and Lucy being cute and having fun.

Lucy - Twitch Sims Streamer, she seems like such a simmer… even sul sul becomes a vocal stim for her eventually

Helsing - Literally only uses Facebook to play those cute farming games + he would absolutely love playing those mystery click and find games

Smash that like button for pt 2 this post was sponsored by Raid Shadow Legends ((/nsrs))