Im Deleting

I ship it

DANNY DEVITO HUGGED BERNIE SANDERS. AND IM CRYING…. NEED! ME! A! FREAK! LIKE! THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You’re welcome

things I’ve learned to say to boys: -you’re not funny -don’t talk to me like I’m dumb -I probably know more about this than you do -don’t fucking talk about her like that -I’m not comfortable with this -I don’t owe you anything -you just repeated exactly what I said -no

I actually freaked out because I didn't think it was the fake knife at first

Ineffective “guard dog”

sound wave of tyler joseph saying “stay alive’ +old bars

accidentally opening internet explorer

I was ringing up a white couples burrito bowls the other day at Chipotle. Their total was $17.38.

I looked at the guy, and asked, “Is this your trap queen?” with a straight face.

 He looked confused as hell, They then looked at the total. They started dying for like 3 - 4 minutes possibly while everybody in line looked confused as fuck.

Good times.

Watch: Jessica Williams also explained why this shouldn’t be a surprise. The message has been in Beyoncé’s music all along.

Give me a warning if youre going to poke my side so that I have more time to punch your face