Nbdhere - Untitled

sense of humor: celebrities tweeting nonsensical phrases and/or straight up keysmashes

STEAL HER LOOK

Gold Angel Wing Earrings - $5.99 (sold at Macys)

Ralph Lauren Flowy Box Black Tank Top - $49.00

Nordstrom Royal Blue Sleek Leggings - $58.75

Hermes Black Birkin Bag - $18,999.00

Gold Collar Necklace - $5,989.55 (as worn by Rihanna)

Commercial Wooden Foldable Table - $54.35 (including White Lacoste Polyester Knit Tablecloth)

Prada Stilettos (optional) - $740.00

I’m so angry and tired of how ads are in every little thing, part of every waking moment of our lives. I hate that there’s gas pumps with TVs in them just to blast ads while you fucking pump GAS and their speaker systems blast ads in commercials between elevator music.

I am tired of how facebook jumped on the unskippable ad train and you can’t look at any kind of minute+ long video with ads everywhere. YouTube is just fucked and has been for years. Scrollable ads on our dashboards and news feeds on other social media, ads ads ads. Not to mention the ads we see in passing in our daily lives in stores, on the road, TV, Radio. It is absolutely inescapable, unless you pay some services to not see this shit.

So yeah maybe this shit is why we aren’t trying to be ‘fake woke’ or whatever it is about the ‘yuo r not imune 2 propganda’ meme, we are just tired of seeing this shit so much even if it’s employees running corporate accounts for ha ha funny clapbacks, we are absolutely at our breaking point with this fucking corporate hell hole nightmare clown world.

if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

Ok so.

We've had a chronic package thief in our building recently. Usually its a very safe building so this is unusual behavior. They had the misfortune of taking one of my pet food orders (75lbs of mouse food) and apartment management was useless so I took it into my own hands.

See, I have a lot of snakes. So I happen to have things like dead rats just lying around. So I took a little box, decorated with some nice washi tape that made it look like it contained jewelry (crystal motif) and addressed it to a nonexistent unit underneath the name "Bill Zibub" and left it in the lobby. It disappears, as expected.

A few days pass and I smell something bad in the hall.

I go to the lobby and I find my dead rat package, very clearly torn open and hastily wrapped back up, with the rat back in it. But what's better is, it got returned with a BUNCH of other mail. They stole a bunch of shit, opened the rat, decided they had enough and brought all that shit BACK.

I know for a fact that the thief brought them back because they appeared in the lobby late at night way past package delivery time (and if the activity I heard was any indicator, the thief lives on floor 2)

I was thinking the thief might return the rat pack in disgust but I am tickled PINK they brought back other stuff.

This is the best prank I've ever played. It sounds so fake. It feels so scripted. I never in a million years thought they'd actually be inspired to return mail over it. This is gonna be my "then everyone clapped" story for the rest of my life.

Fuck around and find out.

true performance art.

Flipping Guardian Trick-Shot