Latest Posts by deathtoyouandtoyours - Page 3
Homemaking, gardening, and self-sufficiency resources that won’t radicalize you into a hate group
It seems like self-sufficiency and homemaking skills are blowing up right now. With the COVID-19 pandemic and the current economic crisis, a lot of folks, especially young people, are looking to develop skills that will help them be a little bit less dependent on our consumerist economy. And I think that’s generally a good thing. I think more of us should know how to cook a meal from scratch, grow our own vegetables, and mend our own clothes. Those are good skills to have.
Unfortunately, these “self-sufficiency” skills are often used as a recruiting tactic by white supremacists, TERFs, and other hate groups. They become a way to reconnect to or relive the “good old days,” a romanticized (false) past before modern society and civil rights. And for a lot of people, these skills are inseparably connected to their politics and may even be used as a tool to indoctrinate new people.
In the spirit of building safe communities, here’s a complete list of the safe resources I’ve found for learning homemaking, gardening, and related skills. Safe for me means queer- and trans-friendly, inclusive of different races and cultures, does not contain Christian preaching, and does not contain white supremacist or TERF dog whistles.
Homemaking/Housekeeping/Caring for your home:
Making It by Kelly Coyne and Erik Knutzen [book] (The big crunchy household DIY book; includes every level of self-sufficiency from making your own toothpaste and laundry soap to setting up raised beds to butchering a chicken. Authors are explicitly left-leaning.)
Safe and Sound: A Renter-Friendly Guide to Home Repair by Mercury Stardust [book] (A guide to simple home repair tasks, written with rentals in mind; very compassionate and accessible language.)
How To Keep House While Drowning by KC Davis [book] (The book about cleaning and housework for people who get overwhelmed by cleaning and housework, based on the premise that messiness is not a moral failing; disability and neurodivergence friendly; genuinely changed how I approach cleaning tasks.)
Gardening
Rebel Gardening by Alessandro Vitale [book] (Really great introduction to urban gardening; explicitly discusses renter-friendly garden designs in small spaces; lots of DIY solutions using recycled materials; note that the author lives in England, so check if plants are invasive in your area before putting them in the ground.)
Country/Rural Living:
Woodsqueer by Gretchen Legler [book] (Memoir of a lesbian who lives and works on a rural farm in Maine with her wife; does a good job of showing what it’s like to be queer in a rural space; CW for mentions of domestic violence, infidelity/cheating, and internalized homophobia)
“Debunking the Off-Grid Fantasy” by Maggie Mae Fish [video essay] (Deconstructs the off-grid lifestyle and the myth of self-reliance)
Sewing/Mending:
Annika Victoria [YouTube channel] (No longer active, but their videos are still a great resource for anyone learning to sew; check out the beginner project playlist to start. This is where I learned a lot of what I know about sewing.)
Make, Sew, and Mend by Bernadette Banner [book] (A very thorough written introduction to hand-sewing, written by a clothing historian; lots of fun garment history facts; explicitly inclusive of BIPOC, queer, and trans sewists.)
Sustainability/Land Stewardship
Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer [book] (Most of you have probably already read this one or had it recommended to you, but it really is that good; excellent example of how traditional animist beliefs – in this case, indigenous American beliefs – can exist in healthy symbiosis with science; more philosophy than how-to, but a great foundational resource.)
Wild Witchcraft by Rebecca Beyer [book] (This one is for my fellow witches; one of my favorite witchcraft books, and an excellent example of a place-based practice deeply rooted in the land.)
Avoiding the “Crunchy to Alt Right Pipeline”
Note: the “crunchy to alt-right pipeline” is a term used to describe how white supremacists and other far right groups use “crunchy” spaces (i.e., spaces dedicated to farming, homemaking, alternative medicine, simple living/slow living, etc.) to recruit and indoctrinate people into their movements. Knowing how this recruitment works can help you recognize it when you do encounter it and avoid being influenced by it.
“The Crunchy-to-Alt-Right Pipeline” by Kathleen Belew [magazine article] (Good, short introduction to this issue and its history.)
Sisters in Hate by Seyward Darby (I feel like I need to give a content warning: this book contains explicit descriptions of racism, white supremacy, and Neo Nazis, and it’s a very difficult read, but it really is a great, in-depth breakdown of the role women play in the alt-right; also explicitly addresses the crunchy to alt-right pipeline.)
These are just the resources I’ve personally found helpful, so if anyone else has any they want to add, please, please do!
I finished dungeon meshi and I just need to doodle the sillies being silly to cope
"(blank) hates laios!" WRONG WRONG WRONG. SHUT THE FUCK UP
shuro is just as awkward as laios and it is made So clear he considers him a friend and likes him. he defends him when the canaries start talking shit and actively readies himself to physically fight them so they dont get to him.
namari also likes laios. she respects him as a leader and also defends him and readies to fight the canaries.
ive not actually seen anyone claim izutsumi hates laios, but a lot of ppl Are weird abt them. izutsumi and laios' relationship was rocky at the beginning. he struggled to figure out how to interact with her. but by the end, she actively seeks him out to talk with during the lead up to the feast. she hides behind him when falin wakes up. she has already realized shecan do what she wants and does not need to stick around, yet she does. she sleeps near him on the windowsill, waiting with him and marcille for falin to wake up. she has accepted him as part of her life and wants to keep him in it.
marcille does not hate laios. let me say this again.
Marcille Donato Does Not Hate Laios Touden.
marcille Loves him. in a platonic, familial sense. laios returns this just as readily. she yells at him. she whacks him. she tells him whats on her mind. she uses healing magic to ease his pain during the parasite fiasco. she reattaches his leg when he loses it. she teaches him magic. she lays her head on his corpse and cries before reviving him. she launches herself at him two times, when the canaries interrogate them and when he talks her down in the tower. he is a comforting presence to her. she trusts him, she cares about him, she worries about him, she imagines him as a big fluffy dog that loves and protects her. laios is her rock when falin is taken from them time and time again. and she tries to be his as well. she whole-heartedly, unconditionally, loves and trusts laios.
chilchuck does not hate laios. laios pays him his rates, no questions asked. laios trusts and respects chilchuck's job as a lockpick. laios does not see him as a child (at least, i cant think of an instance where he does so). chilchuck states, outright, he sees him as a friend and doesnt want to see him hurt. he actively worries about him as the falin situation gets worse. chilchuck respects laios. he shows almost 0 hesitation in helping get falin back, nor eating her by the end. he does not think of leaving him once, until he realizes he could lose him. chilchuck is cowardly with emotions and prefers to bottle things, so his first instinct was to bolt. he was angry because he was scared of watching someone he cares about destroy himself. laios is his Friend.
and holy shit. holy Fucking shit. kabru DOES NOT hate laios. kabru has the rockiest start known to man with him, and he Still helps him by occupying the canaries. he warns him about them. he hides the black magic from them just as shuro does. his whole Thing is trusting laios despite himself. kabru has his own baggage regarding other people, just like laios, yet he tries so hard to believe and trust this man. he Wants to. kabru is not very hopeful, but laios makes him Want to be. he states like 3 times he wants to be close to him and sees him as a friend. he stays through the entire feast!! the man who hates monsters, whose biggest trigger is monsters, actively, consciously, Willingly stayed through the entire monster meat feast. all to help his friend get his sister back. he could've left!! the feast was like an entire week!! yet he was there for every single day. he was one of the closest people to the door when falin awoke!! after reuniting with her brother, her friends, the people who knew her the most (plus senshi and izutsumi), the first person she greets is kabru!! he wants to be close to laios, he likes laios, laios is his friend and he cares for him, he wants to meet his sister!!! kabru fucking stays on the island with him as one of his closest, most trusted advisors when he becomes king!!!!! he wants to help him succeed!!!! he wants him to be happy!!!! laios is his friend!!!!!!!!
im just. people like laios!! laios is a nice guy! he is friendly and cares about people! he is weird, he doesn't understand most social cues, he oversteps boundaries, but they stay beside him, because they like him and he is their friend. he is their friend!!!!! friendship is not all sunshine and rainbows, relationships in general are not sunshine and rainbows. you will upset people, people will upset you, you will get into arguments, things will happen, but at the end of the day, the people close to you like you! they love you! they care for you! they want to work it out and get through it because they love you, but they will feel those emotions first! human relationships are complex and messy and life is complicated. even shows for toddlers know this.
if you truly believe any of these characters hate laios you are worse than a toddler. watch some fucking oobi or something. god. fuck.
take this
thanks
Sometimes I’m reminded that in universe Chilchuck is an actually influential figure who like. Made huge advancements for his people and community. Like as in gave them rights and protections. And who is widely known by half-foots because of that. Like. He’s not just some guy.
Idk For some reason that just makes his role in canon really funny to me. Like this older, extremely important and accomplished figure is just willingly putting himself thru it for the sake of this random autistic 26 year old.
Heritage post
THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN
fucked up how colors look different depending on what screen you’re looking at them on. that should be illegal I think
So sick of dog motif what about cat motif.
I love you but we don't love the same. I can't be near you when you want me to be. Your love is smothering and your need to keep me safe is trapping me. I'm my own person but I don't know how to show you that. I lash out and hurt you even though I don't mean to. I need you to move slowly around me or I'll bolt. I love you, even though I don't say it. If you stay still I'll sit next to you, and even though we don't understand each other we can be together like that.
every year I post this meme and every year people get more mad at me than they did the previous year
Too many ignorant progressives trying to tear Biden down because they're not happy about things Biden has no control over or he's not doing their bidding or acting fast enough to keep them happy.
Here is a list of everything anti-Biden progressives are helping to bring into reality by their support of Trump or by voting 3rd party which is the same as voting for TFG:
1) Abortion will be banned nationwide.
2) Contraception will be banned shortly thereafter.
3) The Supreme Court will be locked hard-right for the next 30+ years.
4) The climate crisis will significantly worsen, beyond our ability to mitigate it.
5) More tax cuts for millionaires and billionaires, spiking the deficit.
6) Trump will not leave office.
7) There will be a recession (there's been a recession during every Republican presidency for the last 100 years -- Google it).
8 ) Prices will NOT return to 2019 levels.
9) 50,000 federal workers will be fired and replaced with Trump loyalists per Project 2025. The lack of checks on his power will make it more likely he will remain in office beyond his term.
10) Similarly, the Department of Justice will shift to being under the direct control of the White House, allowing Trump to arrest anyone who's been mean to him.
11) Russia will annex Ukraine then move to invade other eastern European nations, probably Poland first—with Trump's support.
12) America will leave NATO.
13) Trump will, as promised, close the pandemic preparedness office.
14) Millions of citizens will be swept up in Trump's deportation blitz.
15) Trump will use the military to arrest peaceful protesters and charge them under the Insurrection Act. Pro-Palestinian protesters will be deported as Hamas sympathizers.
I cannot imagine having so much privilege as to believe this is okay would not affect me.
Original comic by Rasenth
Tell me an inside joke between you and a friend, without context.
yo…. when jet breaks in the tea shop and accuses zuko and iroh of beinh firebenders….
do you think any of the patrons looked at zukos scarred face - obviously done by a firebender - and immediately think jet was an asshole? like
jet: hes a firebender!!!!
patrons, thinking about the backstory they concocted for zuko and iroh where their home was invaded by firebenders and they barely survived with their lifes so they could come and have a peaceful life selling tea in a city the war doesnt touch:
happy Thursday the 20th
i made tumblr pride flags! feel free to ask or more edits
I don't think it matters how small your account it. They will come for you if they feel like it. Also odd that they're not targeting very many transmascs from what I've seen.
Maybe it's not even regular transphobia. Maybe it's also misogyny.
Anyway, I hope someone at the corporate level stages a fucking coup or something because this isn't how you run a business. Tumblr already S T R U G G L E S to make money, and targeting both its previous, dwindling user base and the new stream of users who have slowly trickled in to get away from other transphobic apps will slowly but surely actually kill the site this time. Tumblr will truly die, and it will be his fault.
here’s the most frustrating part is we see who is being repeated deleted off this site and there’s no one to go to to be like what the fuck is happening? like. we won’t get any explanation and if we do it’ll be some watered down, corporate esque response that literally gives no information and will distance any moderator from the situation. i hate this. i hate how powerless i feel as a user, a mutual to the trans women being repeatedly targeted. i can’t do shit to fix this. no one can do anything besides remake and cross fingers that the blog will survive.
It's unfortunate how often the solution to a problem is just talking to people. You'd think it could be something easier like making a comprehensive chart or list, or reading everything you can find on the subject, but no, so often you can do all that and you still have to talk to people.
Please don't ask me for relationship advice unless you are prepared to receive some truly upsetting information because some people are ready for the "He's exhibiting the literal textbook signs of a psychological abuser and you need to get away from him before he successfully cuts you off from your support network" talk and some people aren't
So uh….some dude apparently recreated Adobe Photoshop feature-for-feature, for FREE, and it runs in your browser.
Anyway, fuck Adobe, and enjoy!
Reminding you that with a single click you can:
feed the hungry
provide a free mammogram
give food and care to a shelter animal
provide a homeless veteran with a meal
fund alzheimer’s research
fund diabetes research
provide books for children
protect wildlife habitat
It’s completely free.
anyone else live under the assumption that they’re constantly doing something wrong
What if we were the opposites of each other but when you boil us down to the core we are inherently the same (and we were both autistic)
One of the newer daycare teachers at my center was complaining about a specific child - who has a lot going on we’re still trying to map out, but definitely some type on developmentally divergent on top of attachment issues with their single mom.
Anyway, said kid, a little under 4 years old, was resisting doing art, which was really upsetting the one one teacher when the other (who’s worked with this kid for over 2 years) was basically like “Ok, not today, this isn’t a good day for you.”
One thing I do when I find kids at the center resisting my instructions is asking “Why” - on me.
Why am I asking this child to do something?
“What they are doing isn’t safe” and “What they are doing is harming another child” are obviously good reasons for me to pursue my point.
“Maintain structure” is, honestly, generally a good reason, where “structure” is the regular rules and expectations of the class and schedule.
Having a predictable structure helps most children feel safe, because they don’t have to be the adult and decide what is going to happen - their teachers are the ones that set boundaries for safety, have their physical needs met, and create expectations that allow them to develop patience and delayed gratification.
But forcing a child to participate in an activity? Not just “now it is art, because we do art every day” but “you must do art??”
Asking my “Why, what is the child getting out of this” devolves down after a few levels to:
The child has to learn to comply over their own mental health.
Even the more experienced teacher who let the one kid sit out and rest from art is irritated when children refuse to sit quietly during Circle Time, which pisses me off because all the trainings I’ve taken on Circle Time say “have a quiet activity optional for children who don’t want to sit and participate.”
Sadly, as I was discussing this with my other Autistic coworker at closing, we agreed that “Conformity despite mental health” is a primary rule in modern education, and both of us despite being aware of the obvious issues with this are powerless to even motivate major change within our own center without taking “Room Lead” roles.
Which we both agree would break either of us. 😓
I turn 30 next month so here’s what I learned in my 20s:
—don’t work for startups, they’re always one ‘innovative idea’ away adding ‘sell your kidneys on the black market’ to your job description.
—keeping a collection of basic OTC medicine on you will save your life one day. I recommend Advil, Imodium, and TUMS.
—those little single-use glasses cleaning wipes are 1000% worth the money
—overly self-depreciating jokes just make people uncomfortable, wean yourself off of them
—you can buy dehydrated mini marshmallows in bulk online and they’re a godsend for hot cocoa
—people don’t care if you have fidget toys on your desk they just want to play with them
—try to go to bed BEFORE the existential ennui kicks in
I fucking knew it, I SAID it: they're making ADHD people the next culture war targets. They will 'just ask questions' until we lose every scrap of ground we've gained in the last decade and more. We may not quite inspire the same level of hatred as a sexual minority, but we can very easily be made to inspire disdain and that also works.
They will strip us of our accomodations and our medications and try to stifle any sense of shared identity, and if that kills some of us, oh well. So long as it fuels another outrage cycle, fine.
So many of the tropes they've been using on trans people work extremely well on ADHD people too! "There are too many of these people suddenly! It must be a fad! It spreads through friend groups! And online! People are going private for diagnoses and that's bad! They are using pOwERfUl medical interventions and we think it's freaky!"
I saw the first ripples of this in terf circles about two years ago. And of course it's spread.
6% of British ADHD people lost their jobs in the last year thanks to the meds shortage. SIX PER CENT! And that just made these ghouls go "ooh, tasty, what else can we do?"
Recently an 'expert' was on the BBC saying people see ADHD diagnosis as a "golden ticket." Laurence Fox has been ranting that the condition doesn't exist and threatening "'you won't poison my child's body [with ADHD meds] against my consent"
People need to be aware this is going to get worse. Maybe, if we're lucky, it won't get really bad. But it's going to get worse than it is now.
