Izzy Stradlin X Reader - Blog Posts

chapter 1 is up bitches.

Chapter one is out bitches!! go read it rnrn. RN. LOOK AT HIM HOW CAN U NOT GO READ IT RNRNRNRNRNRNRNNRRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNRNNRNRN

A little death 1

summary: Rock n Roll was at its peak, and so was Guns n Roses. However, the most popular band had lost their drummer, and what’s a rock band without their drummer? So when a new girl steps in to fill the gap in their band, slash doesn’t take too kindly to her. She’s wild, untamed, free spirited, an addict, and yet, she was free. Everyone loved her. The world loved her. And yet, Slash couldn’t. He hated her. Plain and simple, because it was easier to hate her, than to love her.

warnings: this will contain mentions of sexual themes and adult themes. if any of those things trigger you, please hope off now :) ....

Axls eyes fluttered open, noticing the chair closest to y/n was empty, Slash’s chair was empty. the redheads gaze moved onto the bathroom door, slightly closed but not fully, light coming but from the bottom of the door. Axl got up and took a glance at y/n, still laying practically lifeless with no color in her face. not makeup, no wine colored lips, nor her pink highlighter. He rubbed his eyes as he walked off to the bathroom, slowly pushing the door open as he looked inside, his best friend was on the floor shaking while he clutched something close to his chest. Axl didn’t say much or anything for that matter and sat down next to him.

he rubbed his knees and he kept his gaze straight. Slash gulped putting his forehead against his knees. Axl took a deep breath, licking his lips before going to speak up.

….

1 MONTH PRIOR

"fucking bitch." Slash muttered under his breath as he took a sip of his water, leaning against a wall as he watched y/n sat on a couch with a bunch of other people around her, all sharing lines. Izzy was next to her as he took a line after her. “hey handsome” A brunette said as she moved her hand along Slash’s shoulders and arms before moving in-front of him, slash took a glance at her before looking over at y/n again, soon enough the girl in-front of him pulled him into a kiss, which he couldn’t resist melting into it.

it took a while before the two pulled away, Slash’s gaze averting to where y/n was sat, to find a empty spot. “i-uh, i gotta go” Slash said patting the lady’s arm before rushing off looking for her, walking into a couple rooms to find some couples fucking, Duff and some groupies, some more people doing lines but no y/n before he heard a voice say “man, get off my dick” followed by a giggle, Slash turned around to check the voice out and found y/n on the floor while a guy was standing infront of her with a bag of what looked like to be powdered heroine.

y/n looked over at Slash and smiled “aye! Sau- oops, Slash!” she giggled, as Slash quickly bent down to help her up “okay, let’s get you back to the hotel” He said concern lacing his voice, this was a routine to Slash at this point, he came to parties to look after y/n. “hey man, come on! we were gonna go do something!” the guy said moving over to grab onto y/n’s arm “hey, fucking touch her again and i’ll fuck you up.” Slash said loudly, y/n’s eyes widened as she giggled once again.

Slash quickly moved y/n’s arm around his shoulder to help her walk out, he walked out the party, helping y/n sit down on the sidewalk before calling over a taxi. once one stopped, Slash, helped her back up and helped her get in the back, getting in next to her as he told the driver where they were headed. he rested back before licking his lips, looking over at her. “did he do anything to you?” Saul said as y/n shook her head “nope, but i sure missed out on some good shit” she chuckled laying her head on his shoulder

“think you can stay awake?” Slash asked, hearing her hum but knowing she was going to do the exact opposite, he rested his palm on her leg, moving his thumb in a circle. it didn’t take long for them to arrive, he paid the driver before nudging y/n awake “come on, need you to walk with me sweets, kay?” he mumbled to her, moving some hair out of her face, as he wrapped her arm around his shoulder just like before, walking them inside the lobby as he moved over to the elevator. “you’ve got a lot of hair, y’ know that?” she giggled as Saul chuckled “yea i know sweets. come on” He said walking them inside the elevator and pressing the floor of their rooms

“oh no!” y/n said scaring Saul as he looked over at her worried “what?” “we forgot Izzy! oh and Axl, and duff too!” y/n said looking at Saul, causing him to laugh “sweetheart, we didn’t forget them, they’ll be here soon. how much did you drink?” he smiled looking down at her as he smiled, noticing y/n’s mascara leaving little marks near the top of her cheeks “hold still” he said moving his thumb to wipe his the stains off, before the elevator ping let him know they’d reached, he helped y/n carefully to her room, her giggles filling the hallway “you’ve got your keycard right?” Saul said, realizing he should get copies of her card

“mhm, right here” y/n said pointing at the pocket that held her wallet, Saul dug his hand into her pocket, pulling out the red leather wallet and taking the card out, putting it against the scanner and pushing the door open as he helped her in and set her down on the bed. putting her wallet on the table under the tv. taking his leather jacket off revealing his rolling stones shirt that he had worn after the concert “take your jacket off for me sweets.” Saul knew y/n never remembered most the night after she got high and drunk, so the sweetness wasn’t remembered after all.

Saul drugged through her toiletries and found the makeup wipes she always had, taking a wipe out before wiping her face clean of any makeup, helping her into the bathroom as he then helped her do the skincare routine he had remembered knowing the band would never hear the end of how she forgot to do it. Once she was done, Saul rushed to get the clothes she slept in, which were a shirt and plaid pj pants. he handed them to her as he waited outside for her, She handed him her old clothes which he put in the laundry bag for house cleaning to take care of. He finally had her in the bed, tucked in and out like a light.

he looked at the clock and realized it was 3 in the morning, knowing she had time before their next flight “hey, im leaving this right for ya, okay?” Saul whispered to her moving some hair again out of her face as he put the trash can next to her along with her painkillers and water “night love” he whispered kissing her forehead before grabbing his jacket and leaving the room, closing the door behind him as he leant up against it, digging his face into his hands

“how long are you gonna keep taking care of her before you two realize you love each other?” Saul heard, looking up to see his red headed friend “ ‘m not in love with her” “you sure? because you could’ve left her to do whatever is what she was gonna do with that guy, and every other night, would’ve left her to come home with Duff and Izzy real late, to sleep in her makeup and heals and leather pants.” Axl said looking at his friend as he licked his lips

“Saul-“ “there’s nothing going on. got it rose?” Slash said, looking at him before walking over to his room which was three feet away from y/n’s unlocking the door “night” he mumbled before walking in and slamming the door shut

…

“you okay?” Axl asked as Slash looked at him shrugging “if she is i am.”

New slash series.

Hellos children. U SEE THIS BEAUTIFUL, GORGEOUS, STUNNINGLY BREATHTAKING MAN? IVE GOT A NEW SERIES COMING OUT FOR HIM. BUT FCKEN TUMBLR PUT A MATURE POST LABEL ON THE MASTERLIST POST N MIGHT FOR EACH CHAPTER SO IM TELLING YALL HERE INCASE TUMBLRS HIDING IT FROM YALL. SO IMA TAG THE MASTER LIST HERE AND IMA PUT OUT A SMALL POST WHENEVER A CHAPTER IS OUT YALL R GETTING ONE SOON THO SO YAY!!!

HERES THE MASTERLIST.

A little death Masterlist.

summary: Rock n Roll was at its peak, and so was Guns n Roses. However, the most popular band had lost their drummer, and what’s a rock band without their drummer? So when a new girl steps in to fill the gap in their band, slash doesn’t take too kindly to her. She’s wild, untamed, free spirited, an addict, and yet, she was free. Everyone loved her. The world loved her. And yet, Slash couldn’t. He hated her. Plain and simple, because it was easier to hate her, than to love her.

warnings: this will contain mentions of drugs, overdoses, sex, drinking and more. if any of those things trigger you, please hope off now :)

part 1 - part 2

My Angel ☆☆

Slash x reader 

warnings: a bit of angst at the start, just fluff, mentions of alcohol and drugs, etc.

summary: y/n and Saul get into a fight about his addiction, and saul finds a letter y/n had written about him.

authors note: listen to September - sparky deathcap, because it fit 💀 part 1!

Saul's eyes slowly began fluttering open, how he'd prayed it was all a bad dream. he could see a figure standing against the balcony door, the soft wind occasionally blowing her hair. it was her, it was y/n. He got up slowly rubbing his eyes as he walked over to her, wrapping his arms around her waist and putting his forehead against her shoulder, what made his heart ache was the fact that she tensed up "please don't do that" he whispered, not being able to handle the thought of her leaving him. She kept her gaze at the beach straight ahead, she knew she should listen to the voice in her head, not Saul's begging her not to leave, but that tiny one that was warning her, to not put herself through, god she should listen but how could she? how could she leave her angel. her beautiful boy.

"you have to promise me. promise me that you won't relapse again, because I can't do this every time. I can't keep handling having to put you in a new rehab program every single fucking time you relapse because the one before didn't work. I can't handle coming home one day to find you dead on our bathroom floor, I really can't Saul, I get so worried when you head over to the studio because I know that if Axl even offers you a drop of fucking heroin you'd take it without a second thought. I can't lose you Saul, and you can't seem to comprehend that, I really can't." she said letting out a few sobs as her hands flew to hide her face in her palms, Saul looked at her and spun her slowly "I am so sorry sweetheart." he mumbled his own tears rolling down his cheeks as he hugged her tightly she wrapped her arms around him sobbing into his chest, how she missed his scent. "I promise you I'm never doing any of that shit ever again, I swear to you y/n." he mumbled into her hair kissing the top of her as she moved to look at him, he looked down into her eyes, wondering how could he have hurt her so much "can I kiss you?" he asked moving some of her hair away from her face as she nodded, parting her lips a bit as he leaned down to kiss her, his hands resting on her cheeks as hers stayed in their place around his waist "I love you, I love you so so much it hurts." he mumbled to her against her lips "I know" she mumbled back as they kept their lips connected, Slash always told her that his lips were made to kiss hers, just hers and no one else's. they were moulded perfectly to fit her lips. once they'd pulled away, y/n kept her forehead against his "I love you, and one day, if you'll take me, I'm gonna marry you, I'm gonna take you wherever you want, we can have those kids you said you wanted" he chuckled through his tears. "you know, the ones with big curly hair and brown eyes?" he said as she grinned a bit knowing he'd read her journal as she had never mentioned kids to Slash "you read that?" she mumbled as she wiped her cheeks "yep, I read the part where I'm your angel. just so you know, I know someone whos even more angelic then I am." he smiled as she moved back a bit to look at him, as her eyebrows furrowed "and whos that?" "you." he said, watching her cheeks turn red as she chuckled a bit "I seriously love you so much," Saul told her caressing her cheek with his thumb "I love you too, baby," she said as he connected their lips once more .... this was short I'm sorry!! but here's part 2!

My Angel ☆

Slash x reader

warnings: a bit of angst at the start, just fluff, mentions of alcohol and drugs, etc.

summary: y/n and Saul get into a fight about his addiction, and saul finds a letter y/n had written about him.

authors note: listen to September - sparky deathcap, because it fit 💀 part 2!!

"Oh go fuck yourself, saul!" she yelled out as tears streamed down her face, staring back at the man she loves. she hid her face in her hands as Saul let realization hit him, he failed her again, he relapsed after promising to stay clean for the third time in their five years together. he called her names, trashed the house, told her he wished he never loved her, that he despised her. all because she had flushed his stash down the toilet, those words were the first thing she said since he started his tantrum. her sobs now filling the apartment "s-shit baby" he mumbled as he walked towards her his hands reaching up to hold her arms "don't touch me" she said flinching away from him almost instantly she finally looked up at him, with a look he couldn't even describe. y/n grabbed her car keys and purse, quickly rushing out of the apartment, leaving saul alone with his mess. she left. his brain was too drugged to comprehend going after her, he didn't know what to do, he was lucky he was even still standing with the number of drugs he's consumed. Saul rushed over to the phone connected to the wall, dialling Stevens number as he waited, till he heard a voice "steven adler speaking!" "adler, I fucking- y/n, she left and... shes gone" saul sobbed into the phone, leaving his friend very confused as Steven looked over at duff who'd been over at his house "hold on, me and duff are on our way okay?" saul nodded, letting the other hang up as he fell against the wall. he looked around the trashed apartment and noticed underneath a pile of glass, was a book. y/ns handwriting on the front of it. it was her journal, the one she always wrote in. he moved over to grab it, his fingers moving over the old leather cover of the book. he opened the book and let whatever page open, his eyes read over the words, letting himself remember how he loved her handwriting, she always said it looked like a little kid's handwriting, almost unreadable but he always read whatever she would write. he noticed the date that was written 22/9/1987. the day guns n roses performed at the ritz in new york. how can he look so pretty, so angelic without even trying, my saul, a complete angel. gosh how I love him, how I adore him, I've loved and adored him since we first met before all this, before guns n roses, back in 84. I don't regret going to Madam Wong's in East Hollywood, I remember how adorable he looked, his hair was less wild then. I remember the funky clothes he wore that night, god how I remember what I felt when he looked at me. I felt like a little girl whose crush held her hand for the first time during recess. I remember how he stumbled over his words when he came up to me afterwards, I remember how gentle his touch was, how he asked to kiss me underneath a faulty street light in California's weather, I remember every date and moment that happened after. I know saul isn't clean anymore, it hurts me knowing he could slip through my fingers at any given moment, he doesn't remember how I held him a few nights back, I could hear his breathing vividly, and I could see how the colour and life was sucked out of him, he looked almost ghost-like. he doesn't know that's why I haven't slept well in the past few nights, how could I? how could I rest knowing my angel might vanish. how I hate when he does it, but then again, how I love him. my beautiful beautiful boy, I gifted him that song and told him it described him very well. a very beautiful boy. I've dreamt of love this good, and I've got it, saul hudson will forever be the man I love. if we're together or broken up, far or close, in love or fighting, he will always be that angel that sits in my heart, strumming his guitar without a care in the world, singing my favourite songs to me, letting me run my fingers through his untamed curls. I wonder if we ever have kids and if they'll take after him, I hope they do, how I would love little version of him, with his beautiful brown eyes, gorgeous black curls, beautiful facial features, warm coloured skin.

how I love him, my sweet beautiful boy, my guardian angel. y/n l/n ♥ Saul hadn't noticed how hard he began sobbing, this was how much she loved him. and yet all he did was tell her he didn't love her at all. he pulled the leather-covered book to his chest and pull his knees to his chest. not realizing that the door had opened and revealed the mess of an apartment to his two friends. Steven's eyes quickly made their way to Saul, who was surrounded by broken glass, and wood. Duff looked around, getting an idea of what just might have gone down. they both rushed over to Slash, glass breaking underneath their steps "Hey man" Steven said as he crouched down to Slash's level "we need you to calm down alright? so you can tell us what happened and where y/n is" the smaller blonde explained as Duff rubbed Sauls back 

"get him some water, Adler" Duff said as Steven rushed to do so. it didn't take Steven long before he made his way back to them handing Saul the glass, who chugged it down rather quickly. "could you now tell us what happened?" Duff asked, Saul, keeping his gaze straight ahead "she found out I relapsed.she flushed all my shit down the drain, and I got mad at her. I yelled, I threw things, broke some more, i-i told her I didn't love her... that I would never forgive her for what she did, fuck man- I told her I hated her, despised her even" he mumbled letting out a sob towards the end "and she told me to go fuck myself, and when I tried to touch her, she moved away and told me to not touch her, and then she... she left without another word. I need her, I really really love her and I fucked up" he mumbled tears rolling down his cheeks, not caring that this had to be the first time he'd cried around the guys. 

Steven squeezed his shoulder before sighing "let's get you to bed, and then I'll clean up here and Duff can go look for y/n/n, okay?" Steven told his friend before he and Duff had helped Slash up and to his bed, the one he and y/n got up from not long ago. the minute Saul's head touched the pillow, he was out. Duff noticed y/n's journal in Saul's grip, he took it and placed it on the bedside table before leaving the room and closing the door behind him, Steven grabbed a garbage bag and began cleaning up the glass "you knew. you knew he was doing drugs again and didn't say a word to her." Steven told Duff looking at him "I know, I already feel like an asshole" the man said as he sat down on the couch ..... part 2 will be up soon, I promise!! thoughts?

ℚ𝕦𝕖𝕖𝕟 𝕠𝕗 𝕞𝕪 𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕥𝕥𝕪 𝕤𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕠𝕝 𝕡𝕣𝕠𝕞

!Teenage! Izzy stradlin/ reader

(Basically Jeffrey Isbell in that fanfic)

Tags: High School, Prom Night, 1980s, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, First Meetings, Rejection, Popular Kids vs Outcasts, Dancing, Music References, Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Meet-Cute, One Shot, Happy Ending, Teen Romance, Second Person POV, Reader Insert and just izzy it’s already a tag.

Description: When prom night turns into a disaster of rejection and humiliation, two outcasts meet on a park bench. She in her ruined sequined dress, he with his crumpled bouquet meant for someone else. Both wounded by the popular kids who chose others, they find unexpected comfort in each other's company. What starts as shared misery becomes an impromptu dance under the stars, proving that sometimes the best moments happen when you least expect them.

a/n: My exams are eating my ass now and I’m tweaking out for them as if I’m going to fight with a literal dragon wtf. This fanfic came to me when I was looking at my old prom photos from middle school (yeah we have those) and I was like: hell yeah. Let’s not sleep that night and write something about our man Izzy, cause once again wtf not. My sleep schedule is already ruined because I catch a real inspiration here so enjoy 🫶🏻

May. The month that all graduates hate, and it's not only because the childhood is over and everyone will fly away from their parents nests to build their own lives. No, not because of this. And not even because the exam season begins, but simply because all the losers of school’s society will once again be humiliated in such a special way that every hope of finding happiness is equal to zero. As you understood we are stalking about prom here. Yes, yes, a place for fairy tales and first kisses, but not for your school. You have long outgrown the age where, sitting in your room, you built castles of love stories and fairy-tale myths that any minute now a prince on a white horse will gallop for you and take you away from this Hell. He should have, but he didn't, as usually happens in life.

Derek is a prince?... no, but the idiot you invited to the prom, the idiot who is the captain of the football team and your date of the night, and the idiot you liked long enough to realize how stupid and naive you were to let your heart beat faster. Every guy you met was idealized, you liked them all simply because they showed their attention to you. You didn't know what love was and probably no one else does, simply because at your age popularity and status are more important than nightly serenades and poetry dedications. So the evening turned into a disaster when Derek accepted your invitation but ended up making out at the prom with one typical and such a stereotypical blonde cheerleader with an open cleavage who was just trying to get the attention of your so-called "boyfriend". Tina. Yes, you noticed this connection between them a long time ago and it didn't make you feel any better when, walking back with drinks, you noticed how they hugged and kissed - it was a low blow. It was like all 206 bones in your body were breaking at once, grinding you into powder, smashing your nose into the dirt and slapping you so hard that a trace of shame would remain forever on your cheek. You remained there as tears welled up and slowly flowed down your cheeks and your heart created a crack in pain. You didn't notice how someone pushed you and all the drinks spilled right on your dress that you had been choosing for months specifically for this event where you were supposed to kiss Derek and wear the crown of the prom. How foolish.

But it looked good, this dress was a bold contradiction of softness and edge, clinging to your figure in rich plum tones that deepened to black at the hem. Those contractions were something that you wanted to prove of yourself, someone you wanted to be for Derek. But it’s not who you are. The fabric shimmered with a galaxy of fuchsia sequins, scattered like stardust across the sheer overlay. Each step made them flicker under the chandeliers, catching the light in flashes that felt almost rebellious that now seemed like nothing with drinks spilled all over it. The bodice hugged you with elegant ruching, sculpting your waist and drawing the eye upward to a halter neckline that hinted at something both vintage and daring. The skirt flared gently into jagged, asymmetrical points, like petals with attitude, brushing just above your knees and swaying like they had their own rhythm. Strapped to your calves were winding black ribbons from your heels, lacing up like something out of a midnight fairytale. On one wrist, a delicate corsage of pale pink and ivory roses sat beside a burst of chiffon. On the other a punch of wild color, thistles and a rose in bruised red and violet, bound in black which gave the impression that maybe you weren’t as soft as you seemed. It wasn’t the kind of dress meant to blend in. It was made to be remembered, but instead you stand there with tears over your eyes and ruined fabric.

You are Cinderella because you lost your carriage and beautiful dress after midnight. Metaphorical confidence and childish naivety clouded your rational mind amidst the rhinestones, sequins and long glitter pendants that read “Prom 1980”. Amongst the crowd of teenagers, drink, fun and sparkly outfits, you felt like a missing piece of the puzzle and like you didn’t belong here. Glasses crashed to the floor and fabric was ruined until you began to realize how stupid you had looked this whole time. “You’re going to lose that girl” by The Beatles in the background didn’t help at all. How all those hours spent in the bathroom had been wasted, how makeup had become unnecessary that all weaknesses had slipped out when someone responded to you after a collision: “Stop standing there like a statue, you bitch. Can’t you see me coming or something?” it only provoked tears, bringing you back to reality. Derek and Tina turned to look you, studying you briefly before turning back with a smirk. You probably looked pathetic. Pathetic little creature. Naive and so stupid like a damn baby. Oh yeah who else you can possibly be than that?

You hate this world. You hate these people and you hate this school. All just to get out of this place, you ran out of the wooden door with a vertical window in the background, slamming it and no longer wanting to return to this damn hall. Everything that was happening around you shook even more, everything around was a trigger for tears and obsessive thoughts. You just don’t understand why all the bad things happened only to you and how you could have been so stupid to fall in love with this bastard? The sound of your heels echoed through the dark corridor as the music in the background disappeared, cracking your skull with memories of what you had seen earlier. Streams of tears ruined your makeup, painting your cheeks in a black stripe of mascara that was inexpensive. Because you were trying to save some money on that fucking dress. In your teenage dreams, you wanted Derek to take it off you. It only hurt more because you believed in yourself so much, preparing and planning everything in advance - speech, words, behavior, smell and appearance. And in the end he chose someone else.

Going outside and quickly walking down the stairs, you sat down on the step and started crying, but louder. You didn't care if anyone saw, those school years were over anyway and those people would leave, forgetting about you and themselves. But honestly you do because you wanted to be remembered as sharp and bright girl just to prove yourself once again that the role you worth for others is definitely not a crybaby. Your teenage hormones didn't help you at all. You're not a child anymore, but you're not an adult either. You're locked between two worlds and nothing can be the same as before. Kaleidoscopes and patterns of different colors blurred in your eyes when you felt the wind blowing your hair away from your bashful face.

Away from the monster you turned into in a matter of seconds after what you saw. You became a laughing stock that they'll hang on the boards of the school stand to ridicule you. It's so stupid and so unfair. But unfortunately you will get everything in this world only if you are popular and have a pretty face like this bitch Tina. Tina Morgan. Now you hate her, although you didn’t like her before either. An arrogant slut who likes to sit on two chairs, just so that all the male attention was on her. And so she oppressed you by receiving Derek and most likely the crown of the prom. Just the thought of this cut off your breath with a sharp pain and you began to feel how tears turn into an excess of air, and your chest can no longer cope. It never even occurred to you that you need to be a bitch to be liked by others. Since childhood, you were taught that princesses who received a crown are kind and beloved women. Not those who behave like Tina. You heard distant footsteps and someone's laughter that was approaching the exit where you were sitting at. Thinking about the bad, you prayed to God or whoever even exists up there, just so that it was not them. But with the door wide open and interested looks, you saw that it was a couple who couldn't tear themselves away from each other until they noticed your intense gaze and turned to ask who you were and what happened. And also why you were crying, which only made it more painful. Fuck you all, you replied, mentally wishing for their lips to stick together and choke them to death. You didn't want to see others happy, especially next to you in a place where it was calm and quiet and no one could possibly disturb you. A place where you could calm down and digest it all.

You stood up again, walking away under intense gazes. Maybe you were weird and that's why no one was interested in you and that's why no one will ever love you. You're an outcast, you're a commoner, you're disgusting, you're lonely, you’re an embarrassment, you’re an attention whore, you’re stupid and... your brain didn't had time to throw up a new insult when you walked outside the school closer to the nearest park and noticed a strange figure sitting on a bench. Some weird guy.

He sits there with a casual, almost defiant slouch, a teenager on the edge of adulthood who wears his confidence like a second skin but he lost it this time. At 17 or 18, he has the lean, wiry build of someone who moves fast and lives faster, with long, inky black hair that falls over his face in tousled layers. His deep-set, dark eyes hint at a restless energy sharp, observant, and constantly sizing up the world around him, were now reduced to thinking mess. He wears a light blazer carelessly over a graphic tee bearing the face of Keith Richards. Stones fan, huh? The contrast between classic rock glam and his gritty, punkish presence is almost ironic. He looked attractive and interesting, which made you stop in your tracks to observe his slouched figure. The shirt hangs a little loose, like everything he owns is either thrifted, stolen, or passed down from someone with better luck. His hands are rested over his knees while he was holding an already ruined bouquet of flowers. Fingers calloused, maybe from playing guitar, maybe from climbing out of too many second-floor windows but you knew that it was altogether for sure. He looked familiar. Everything about him says he doesn’t care, but the way he poses, half-challenging, half-inviting and half-thinking tells you he does. Just not in the way most people do.

You slowly approached him, sincerely not understanding what he was doing here and why you had the feeling as if you had seen him somewhere before. He is surely from your school.

-«Hey... can I sit here?» you called him out with a slightly shaking and hoarse voice after crying, swallowing saliva and already accepting your fate.

The black-haired guy looked up and you recognized him. Jeffrey Isbell, the same guy from your school who everyone calls a “weirdo” because of his strange style and “gay” because of his long hair. And he also loves the Stones, which clearly shows how much worse the situation has gotten since the wave of hate towards this band and how all of their fans immediately became gay. It's hilarious. His chestnut gaze was looking at you and you had already lost your guard for a second while he calmly nodded with a hint of attention, moving away and leaving you a place next to him. Weird guy, he looks so calm and enigmatic as if he were the surface of the ocean. He put the bouquet on the other side of the bench, leaning back while the rustling of leaves played a serenade, letting you both get used to each other. This... Jeffrey is definitely weird but he's dressed cool and his hair looks cool. You had almost forgotten that he was friends with this crazy guy Bill Bailey from your parallel or whatever he was.

-«Tough night?» a hoarse teenage voice soaked in testosterone suddenly sounded somewhere to your left. You were already looking at him, but it didn't matter because he was also looking at you, directly pointing with his gaze at your ruined makeup and obvious dejection.

-«That's an understatement but... yeah you can say that.» You answered with a nervous laugh, looking away and bitterly chuckling, not wanting to feel his intense gaze on you, as if he already knew your entire family tree and also your favorite drink. But it's better to just forget, because the worst thing is if he realizes that you were rejected in front of everyone and you, like a naive fool, cried thinking that it was love. «And you?» you turned the arrows in his direction, not wanting to raise this topic.

-«Tina Morgan.» He answered calmly, which made you raise an eyebrow, realizing that words were not needed here. You were both in the same hole. What a coincidence...

-«Ah...» was the only thing that came out of your mouth, realizing that you absolutely don’t know how to support others, or even yourself. It is such a difficult task and you definitely need to study for at least another 12 years.

-«Yeah... and you as I get it is Derek Henderson?» He turned in your direction with sympathy, also deftly avoiding the main topic, not wanting to bare his wounded soul and deep shame for believing in love. Just as you. It's strange, because this is one of the reasons why humans can be called humans, and they are so embarrassed by this feeling. Like what the heck, dude?

-«Yes.» You nodded, looking at your hands that you placed on your knees, playing with the fabric of your ruined dress. «I take it you were also rejected and replaced by someone better?» You said it with such deep pain feeling that tears were about to flow down again but his voice distracted you.

-«Well yeah... I spent three weeks getting ready and even spent money on a bouquet. The price I could have bought new strings or wires for my guitar for.» Jeff started. Which made you look up understanding his pain, you also spent so much pocket money on a dress, although you could have bought posters of your favorite performers. Even if we talk about Jeffrey, his outfit was most likely borrowed from his father or a relative judging by the quality of the fabric. But he was still irresistible. Well, that's what you thought. Of course.

-«Me too. I spent a month choosing a dress and in the end it's ruined. I could have bought posters or vinyl in that store down the street with that money.» You shook your head feeling your own absurdity and stupidity thinking that it was really so important for your money. «So I came hoping he likes me but he chose Miss Perfect... but I don't blame him, I'm really not good enough for him.» You said, feeling your eyes getting wet again. Damn Derek.

-«Not good enough?» Jeff suddenly said, making you look up at him while he just frowned. There was no pain in his eyes even after Tina, which made you so jealous. How did he do it so easily?

-«Look at me!» You exclaimed, feeling an obsessive sense of injustice fill your soul. This world hates average, which is what you definitely were. «I'm not a cheerleader and I'm definitely not a blondie with perfect curves who just came out of Vogue! Of course, nothing would ever work out between us...» You realized how pathetic you sounded pouring out your soul to a guy you barely knew, who clearly didn't give a damn about you and your problems. Tears started flowing from your already wet eyes again. It simply couldn't be any worse than it already is.

-«I hope it’s a joke.» Jeff replied, from which you looked up at him, clearly not understanding what he wanted to say. He only smiled slightly lifting the corner of his virgin lips in a light form of support. «Wipe your tears, this bastard does not deserve you. Now crying because you can’t buy a poster of your favourite musician is a real problem. I sold my soul for this T-shirt with Keith.. so this is the only thing that supported me this evening. I mean…I could cry over Tina but she’s not Richards.» His velvety and such a boyish voice pleasantly flattered your heart, from which you blinked wiping your eyes, feeling a strange sensation in your lower stomach. He supported so strangely but skillfully, as if thousands of crying girls were sitting next to him and asking for help.

- «....» you simply lost your words listening to him, of course you knew that he was slightly strange and detached guy who almost has no friends except for the rockers with whom he plays behind the garages and this crazy Bailey. But this level of support was definitely something new.

-«See? You have nothing to say because I'm right.» He smiled sarcastically and it gave you such a big explosion somewhere inside, letting the ecstasy spread through the body and the butterflies fly up the stomach and straight to the heart feeling every rhythmic beat. You always wrote it off as hormonal reactions, being a teenager trying to grow up and get some brain. Just because falling in love with every lamppost... is a little weird. «You're not the type of girl who deserves tears, you don't deserve anything related to this at all.» Jeffrey added, which made you have so many questions that no professional who has considered them all will be able to answer them. But the most understandable is where did he suddenly get interested in you? In you...

-«And what do I deserve then?...» you asked, swallowing the lump in your throat and feeling how all the unpleasant feelings accumulated at the level of your dignity.

-«This.» Jeff replied and turned the other way, taking out his crumpled and dirty flower bouquet he earlier left on the other side of the bench. «You deserve it.» He replied with a smile that made you smile back. What a romantic this dude.

-«A dirty bouquet?» You laughed awkwardly, already thinking that if they will ever invent a time machine, you will erase your existence for such a response to elementary flirting.

-«C'mon, think one more time.» He tut his tongue and shook his head. «It's not that bad, even if it was thrown on the floor. I think that next to you, it will shine with new colors ... as cheesy as it sounds.» He looked at you, still holding the bouquet and pointing it at you, with such an enticing face. As if begging you to take it.

-«Is this an invitation?» you asked with some naivety, holding out your hand and intercepting the bouquet that he gave you, lightly touching his fingers, from which the touch went through your body like electricity, causing goosebumps.

- «You're certainly not a cheerleader and you're definitely not a blondie with perfect curves who just came out of Vogue. But I'd be a fool if I didn't give you this bouquet.» Jeff paraphrased you, from which you smiled and the tears were forgotten. That bastard Derek and slut Tina, could suck it. They can bathe in perfectionism as much as they want, but we will always be one step closer to the truth ... simply because we are real and not fake Barbie and Ken.» said the black-haired guy, pushing his body up from the bench and holding out his hand to you.

-«This...» you looked at him in surprise, sincerely not understanding what just happened and what was going on. He was so quiet and aloof almost always, and here his other side of the coin was calling you to forget about this world and accept reality. This introverted guy that you briefly saw in the corridors did not stick out in your memory until this evening.

-«Shall we dance? I don't want to invite artificial blondes anymore. I like humans, not dolls, even if I'm disappointed in them... which I don't think will last long, because you'll fix it.» He smiled and for a second it seemed to you that you were sleeping, that any minute now you would hear the alarm clock and wake up.

-«But... I don't want to go back there and anyway-» you didn't have time to finish as Jeff interrupted you, shaking his head and using all his efforts, all his masculine charm to attract you. Although to be honest, you thought that he didn't even have to try.

-«No. We're not going back there, they can have all the fun they want but we have our own fun here.» Jeff said.

-«It's quite shitty..» you commented pessimistically, reluctantly taking his hand and standing up from the bench holding the bouquet in your hands.

-«Then...we are the king and the queen of our own shitty prom, how does that sound?» he nudged your shoulder before his other hand let go of yours and with permission from your eyes he dropped his hand at your waist.

-«Still shitty.» you smiled letting him catch you while the rustling of leaves distantly carried loud music from a nearby building filled with students who next year will leave, disappear and only the school photo book will remember them. You and Jeff are part of them, but it didn’t affect your dancing at all, as the song reached your ears you grabbed each other twirling and dancing under the night lights. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders while the bouquet hung somewhere behind him. Let time stand still, everyone will forget you and you will forget them.

-«You’re hard to please..» Jeff joked, looking straight into your eyes with sarcasm. That damn smirk was spreading across his face again.

-«You're not Jimmy Page for me to like, but your resemblance attracts me.» you said back.

-«Oh, so... you're also a Zeppelin fan? Welcome to the club. We love black-haired guitarists.» Jeff replied, studying your face with interest, like a painter memorising every detail. «I just hope you're not here with me because I'm a black-haired guitarist and look like a kid of Keith Richards and Jimmy Page.»

-«No.» You shook your head with a laugh. He had a particular sense of humor and you were definitely starting to like it. It wasn't just because he calmed you down so quickly and brought you back to your senses. He was just being himself. «But that could be one of the reasons.»

-«I don't know if that's a compliment or an insult.» Jeff replied, his eyes falling on yours. You wanted to drown in them so much.

-«Neither. I just found your resemblance amusing.» You shrugged, until a barely audible song reached your ears, this one was "Dancing Queen" so ironic.

-«Too bad.. I was hoping for the former.» He grinned with such cheekiness that sometimes you considered the quote don't judge a book by its cover, because there might be a masterpiece behind it. And that masterpiece was most likely standing in front of you, which made you feel weird again.

-«What do you think... I'm weird? Well... I mean..if I think about them?..» You didn't want to specify who, because in any case, you'll come out as a weirdo. Thinking about rock stars is weird because they're a few years older than you and they certainly won't notice you... and thinking about Derek and Tina is also weird. Just because that's what they're waiting for. For you to waste your tears on them.

-«We are all weird in our own way. And I love the way you are weird, because it makes me fell more comfortable being weird with you.» Jeffrey replied, leaving you speechless again. Sometimes this weird guy was such a poet that you wondered if he was from a fairy tale. With a gentle smile, he leaned forward to your ear, letting you smell him. He smelled like….teenager, but better, like a guy who is preparing to become a man, leaving his boyhood behind. It sounds weird, but he looked smarter beyond his years. Jeff hummed the melody of Dancing Queen in your ear, with such a husky and slightly underdeveloped voice, trying to impress you with his singing. Such a gentle and quiet half-whisper, so that only you could hear. So that no one else could enjoy his mini concert for you. He would have been a great musician. «You are the dancing queen...Young and sweet, only seventeen..»

You danced with him to this melody until the very end and until the beginning of the next one, realizing that sometimes the best things happen when you least expect them and don't prepare for them for months. They just come and change your life upside down. Just like this black-haired guy who whispered different songs to you all evening while you danced like an old couple to the hits. Such a stupid thing this life, first it cripples then heals. But you knew that Jeffrey would definitely make you love this little thing called….life.

ChaptGPT knows what’s up 😎😎( I kinda joined the trend so I will put down the full list it gave me if someone is interested):

2)Jim Morrison

3)Joan Jett

4)Mick Jagger

5)Robert Plant

6)Debbie Harry (Blondie)

7)Prince

8)Slash (Saul Hudson)

9)Stevie Nicks

10) Kurt Cobain

𝑾𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒄𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒗𝒊𝒕𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒏 𝒊𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒚 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅

Izzy stradlin/ fem!Reader

Tags: original female character, late 1980s, karaoke night, music, cussing, smut, p in v sex, not established relationship, implying drug use, teasing, just Izzy (is already a tag), drunk/high state, wall sex, fingering kind of, maybe some other additional tags to be added(tell me if I missed something) + also it’s very long and I’m sorry but still hope you enjoy (lol).

Description: Under the neon lights of the Sunset Strip, a night of karaoke with Izzy Stradlin takes an unexpected turn. As MDMA flows through your veins and classic rock anthems fill the air, boundaries blur between performance and desire. What begins as musical connection evolves into something far more intense, but in the haze of substances and stolen kisses, can anything real emerge by morning?

a/n: that was supposed to be one of the chapters for my Ao3 fanfic with Izzy “Anhedonia” (shameless promotion yeah ikr) but I changed my plans for the plot itself so this chapter won’t be originally there. But I was kind of sad to throw away this beautiful chapter so I changed it a little bit to make a smut out of it. (lol what a lovely way to let this chapter live) So maybe I will post it here and on my Ao3, I’ll see. Anyway, I hope you enjoy cause it’s my first time writing smut (sorry if it’s ass) and I kind of need to train for further usage of this “genre”. 🫶🏻🫶🏻

A strong grip grabbed your hand, leading you through the crowd of people who stuck to each other like tongues on ice, exchanging scents. His dilated pupils and clouded gaze could not be erased from your memory, while the “vitamin” taken half an hour earlier worked deep under your skull, creating a false sense of comfort in the middle of an ocean of the unknown. Izzy’s calloused and dry fingers intercepted yours, gluing the skin, so smooth, like child’s with his flaky and warm one. The difference was sensual. The rings he wore cooled some corners of your limbs, only to sweat again after a while, sliding like oil and electrifying the sense of touch. Like two teenagers, you ran after each other along the dark and dimly lit streets of the Sunset Strip, laughing with all your might and feeling especially free. It seemed to you that the whole world is just nonsense, you are the main character of your story where all those people are your friends and in general you are the queen of the whole world. You became more social and wanted to make friends with everyone. Izzy became more alive, you don’t know if you will remember him like this, if in the morning when the carriage turns into a pumpkin you will remember his happy eyes, saturated with euphoria. Remembering the fact that he threw off the shackles, running away with you from the imaginary guards of your prison with him inside your reality. Now in your heads there was not a single negative thought or guilt for actions, you felt good. And it doesn’t matter what the world thinks, because only you exist.

Somewhere in the distance, music was playing from some old convertible crookedly parked on the side of the road, spraying Bowie or Prince songs everywhere, you did not catch the familiar melody with your ears, not even having time to look back as Izzy pushed you after him into a dim alley lit only by neon and light from the windows of people who lived above. The air around you smelled of gasoline, burning, cheap street food and cigarettes, making the space just a thick impenetrable flow of mixed smells that your nose did not perceive well. Lifting your chest up, then down and then up again, you opened your mouth wanting only to inhale more air than everyone else, collecting a large armful of the remaining pure oxygen. It’s not real in places like this and soon it will be sold in bags along with drugs, because substances trick our brains, making us feel a constant need for something that our bodies do not need. Air is needed more than cocaine. One to live, another to not die. Izzy has the same reaction to you, especially now when his tall figure like a shield pushed everyone around, trampling a path for you through the tall grass and helping you further to the very corner of the alley where a red neon sign awaited you: “Backbeat Karaoke Lounge”. Slightly blinking, as if all the life was sucked out of it. The two letters “K” in the karaoke didn’t glow, which is why you couldn’t immediately read what was written there, already feeling like everything was swimming before your eyes. The other letters were still shining, like stars at the end of their lives, indicating the fact that soon no one would even guess what was written on this damn sign.

Izzy pushed the heavy wooden door with his shoulder, directing it forward. It was covered with leatherette like in underground clubs. Inside, behind this door, it generally smelled of cheap beer, overheated bodies and cigarette smoke that blurred the vision. Heat rushed into your body. You didn’t imagine Izzy’s brain being the genius of bad ideas, but in the last few days he began to show his bad side too often. Maybe this is for the best, fate screams run, but your brain says otherwise and begs you to stay. The impossible is possible, especially now when you realize that it’s already been several days since you met him and during this time you managed to spend more time together than apart. It says something, but you don't know what it is yet. It might be bad, it might be good, but it doesn't matter how fast your story does, it matters how deep it goes into your skin. And Izzy will stay there because he can't get his satisfaction.

Familiar pupils caught yours when you found yourself in place where everyone around you was free. Or rather, substances gave them wings of freedom sending them to heavenly heavens of pleasure while black filled the blooming surface of irises. Your euphoric wings of MDMA had long been digging in your brain, like a stick in an anthill releasing dopamine into free fall throughout the body while the world acquired colors and unusual softness, like moss. There was nothing under your feet and muffled music sounded in your ears, you feel it with every cell like a drowning man. Your senses were indeed the drowning Brian Jones. Yes, you are drowning just like him because breathing has become harder with every step. Like light through water, a neon sign on the wall meets you with Izzy inside "Sing your heart out" through this whole black hole of hedonism and damn prostitution of the soul. The ceilings were low, the walls were knocked off and only along them there were a few peeling booths with old posters - KISS, The Clash, Rolling Stones and many others that could be named during all evening. You liked them and now especially wanted to become one of them.

Izzy bought you drinks to sing karaoke for free, succumbing to another promotion and provocation to attract customers, selling more drinks. Karaoke evening once a week and you are already like Sherlock removing the mask from the false offers of an unpopular bar that is so eager to increase revenue. You looked around with your jaw lost somewhere as if you had never been to karaoke. In front of you was a small stage with two microphone stands, on the sides there were speakers on tripods, so old but powerful. They were so similar to guards. Behind the stage there was a TV with a convex screen and sometimes it seemed to you that it was about to pour out forward like liquid but solid magma. From the inside, there were low-res background videos of some beaches, random night shots of fireworks, waves and Tokyo. You wanted to jump right into the screen and be there among the azure waters and attractive pictures, only not here among the sweating crowd. A LaserDisc player, cassettes with soundtracks, a large remote control for selecting songs and a film were at your disposal when some idiots walked away realizing that real rock stars had come to replace them. You immediately took up the wired microphones with a metal grill and a power button, feeling like a real star. If only you could change your suit, you would be a real Freddie Mercury. Izzy was fiddling with the equipment when he returned from the bar counter, holding two large glasses of refreshing beer in his hand, which he left next to the screen, knowing for sure that both of you would sing until the end. What a tech geek. This guy knows his stuff and it seems he is not here for the first time.

- «Take on me.» you said out of the blue to which Izzy turned to you with a half-smile.

-«Is this flirting?» he asked in his usual raspy voice that jumped an octave higher, making him clear his throat. It was like he was hoping you meant something. Sometimes he was such a teenager that it made you smile and ruffle his hair with a smirk.

-«This is a song.» you pointed to the disc that laid out in a line with hundreds of others to which he turned his high eyes to you with disapproval not wanting to start with pop songs but noticing how your own puppy-like irises were looking at him, he nodded inserting the tape into the player, adjusting everything with the remote control as needed while you smiled with anticipation and nervously chattered your teeth. Familiar music came out of the speaker and it made you jump with anticipation, there was a small crowd around and you didn't care about them simply because Izzy and those songs meant more to your cheerful, high and exploratory view than a couple of idols that came to stare at you.

Izzy tuned in knowing that pop was definitely not what was on his playlist, but he decided to give you what you wanted. After all, it was his turn later. Anyway, he was here for one reason and that reason was reflected in his eyes as the first words appeared on the screen. Your voice was like that long yellow line, eating up the words, reproducing them from the screen into reality and pushing Izzy in the shoulder so that he would sing too and not stare at you.

- «…Today is another day to find you.» he blinked, returning to the screen and trying to catch the rhythm after the lost equilibrium he had just experienced when you had knocked him back into reality with your punch. Okay, lost social rating points again, he can give his cup back and run to the locker room in tears. How embarrassing, why was he staring at her? Okay..time to sing

- «Shying away.» Your voice complemented it and you turned to him as if apologizing for the awkward start. «I'll be coming for your love, okay?» such irony, such a sick and dishonest irony connected your views, which made you smile when his usual nut colored gaze caught yours. He sang it too and maybe it just seemed that way to you because you were high and all the people around you were your friends. But he clearly wanted to tell you something with this, because you weren't just joking around at the bar, but experiencing a small catharsis where even a small song is a confession.

- «Take on me.» Izzy's voice caught this chorus, which made you remember Morten Harket and his performative video where he calls a blonde girl with him to the world of comics on the other side of existence. Now this scene was similar to yours, it seemed that you were both about to run away to where no one would find you.

- «Take on me.» you smiled, catching his voice like a shooting star. Even if you couldn't sing, even if it didn't sound like Harket's, you both complemented each other. You weren't afraid to embarrass yourself, even if you were high, just because Izzy was there and he was in the same situation. 1:1.

-«Take me on.» such a cigarette and hoarse voice, completely unsuitable for a pop star, sounded from his thin and so desirable lips. Everything in the world seemed possible under the influence of drugs, even if from the outside you looked like idiots. You just wanted to forget and clasp his neck, giving him the opportunity to do everything he wanted with you.

-«I'll be gone... In a day or two» you tried to raise a high note, looking at the screen, then at Izzy, from which you got confused, feeling how laughter came out of your mouth by itself. Everything seemed so funny and simple. Even the fact that this phrase sounded ironic from your lips, you already forgot about everything looking into these deep brown or dark olive eyes, they changed color in the dark. You wanted to jump inside them, diving to the very depths, to his very heart. This feeling was repulsive knowing that you haven't even known each other for a week, but so what? No one cares.

The song continued and you began to dance when the melody began to gain momentum, pop music sometimes made you subconsciously shake your limbs and, like a hypnotized zombie, catch the rhythms in time with your heartbeat. Even despite your great love for rock, pop was sometimes the source of your joy, also doing magical things with your consciousness. A couple of people around you were also singing along, looking at you and nodding to the beat, someone was filming with a Panasonic camera, someone was laughing hysterically in the corner of the bar with a group of friends , some couple at the bar were kissing while the bartender was dusting himself askew, wiping glasses and having a strange hairdo like Elvis. You knew that you didn’t regret coming here at Izzy’s request, knowing that he has good taste in such places. He knows that music is a form of speech, and perhaps by sharing it with you this evening he was sharing words that none of you can say. The room was periodically filled with flashes of light, constantly illuminating your faces in different colors, while you tried different versions of Izzy on your tongue. Like a multi-colored Polaroid painted with different markers. The sounds of clicking, blinking screens and the muffled voices of those who chose songs danced around your temples. Your and Izzy’s song, came to an end with the cherry blossoms in the background as you sang the last line, your voice carrying through the room, feeling like it was your last day. You were so close, smelling the cigarettes on his body, dusting his skin with sugar, tasting the cherry gloss on his lips and the sheen of sweat on your collarbones. One touch and fate would chop his head off and burn you with the fire of karma, making you feel guilty for losing clear control in the midst of the musical and drug adrenaline.

-«Now it's my turn to choose.» Izzy said, pulling away and grabbing his glass of beer to ease the dryness in his throat.

-«What will you choose?» you asked, pulling the tape out of the player, still trying to get your breathing back to normal.

-«Gimme Shelter.» Izzy said as he picked out the right one from the stack of tapes and replaced pop with the Stones while you quickly gulped down your beer, returning your gaze back to the screen.

- «Classic.» You nodded back at him, getting ready to sing as the familiar guitar sound began to hit your chest so dryly with a rhythmic beat. Your fingers grabbed the microphone with a tremor, not from fear or excitement but from a feeling of dizziness, it seemed like you were about to fall when the Stones began to play, you loved this band so much and knowing that you were singing their song with Izzy gave your body a signal to lose gravity as the words began to appear on the screen one by one.

- «War, children, yeah..» He sang with you in unison as the words appeared on the screen again. The Stones really knew how to bring people together with taste.

- «It's just a shot away, it's just a shot away» you sang along feeling like Mick Jagger, as if your chest was about to fry in the hellish flames of submission to fate while the song, like a scream, pierced the ashes of war and desperation through a long slow motion.

- «It's just a kiss away, it's just a kiss away..» Izzy sang along, closing his eyes and letting the music flow through his veins like heroin throughout your duet.

- «Kiss away, kiss away, hey!» you raised your hand up, feeling the energy of the melody only to splash it out of your body with different movements, understanding why the lead singers were dancing on stage. The culmination of the melody and different pictures on the screen did not take long to come and smiles of euphoria spread across your face again, washing it all down with more sips of beer, feeling how the glass empties quickly with the same speed as the pain, joy and adrenaline in your body after the «performance».

- «It's your turn to choose.» Izzy said, returning with another batch of drinks, using your wallet. Money was pouring out of it in stacks, although its joke, no, because you won't let him know that it's not even equal to what you have. Time is ticking fast again, not obeying your power.

- «Whole lotta love.» You smirked with a note of defiance in your voice while Jagger's voice and his sticky as gum Gimme shelter still pulsated in your temples. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe you were crazy.

- «Ohh..» Izzy whistled, replacing old glasses with new ones and leaning over the tapes, changing the Stones to Zeppelin. «Not bad, not bad.» The sound with a bad mix went through the speaker again, but with such soul. In the second minute of the song, you regretted that you were alive when sounds similar to moans went through your ears, you did not turn around to Izzy, not giving him a chance to look at you in a moment of vulnerability. But it wasn't long before the guitar sounds came to your aid, drawing your attention back to the lyrics. You still liked the song despite that small aspect, especially the fact that Izzy sometimes imitated the guitar with his fingers during the solo, making you smile at him. Someone lit a cigarette at the bar, and the smoke hung in the air, swirling in spirals under the very ceiling, letting imaginary clouds form, as if a karaoke machine was releasing smoke at the end or your and Izzy's minds. It all felt like an emotional episode. From Take On Me, where everything is still sweet and naive, to Gimme Shelter, where there is threat and desire, and to Whole Lotta Love, where everything becomes frankly physical and dangerous. The first is about escape, romanticism and illusion, the second and third are about threat, passion and an apocalyptic breakdown. Like your situation with Izzy, first a light hallucinogenic euphoria, then something much heavier and deeper, just like now.

Your hands, covered in glitter, then wrapped around each other as you drank glass after glass, song after song, losing your voice for hours. But you didn't care, because everything around you was floating. People - not people, but colored spots. The bar - not a bar, but a black room with lights, like a ship during a storm, screams, words and lyrics mixed, changing personalities like cards. You were two social chameleons exchanging yourselves for other people, becoming singers of fortune and world stages. Satisfaction, Stupid girl, Come together, Dude, Dream on, Light my fire, Somebody to Love, I love Rock’n’Roll… followed one after another eating up the minutes on the clock and erasing the passers-by, making people in the bar come and go, the places empty and faces spinning before your eyes, crossing out the exact contours. And yellow words appeared on the screen with white shadows, slowly emerging against the background of a murky view of Tokyo in the 70s, cars, women in kimonos, lights of night streets and meaningless shots, but it didn’t matter when the song was playing, all that was needed was the words and the rustling recording on the camera with the name of the song/band. Holding the microphone with both hands as if it were a life preserver, you danced, fooled around, half-hugged and just had fun with each other while the alcohol mixed with the drug, erasing any perception of shame. Your wallet didn’t lag behind the fun either, no longer supporting your and Izzy’s drunk faces. The last song of the night or already the morning, you don’t remember exactly, was because your pocket money that you took with you “just in case” betrayed you, leaving you on the sidelines of torn memories, barely moving carcasses and plastic cups with cocktails left by someone on the edge of the stage that trembled from the sound.

MDMA whispered under the skin and caressed, so pleasant and so satisfying. The heart beat out a rhythm, dancing in the middle of your chest, ready to jump out from there while your eyes were intertwined with each other among hundreds of others. Around nothing entered the memory, the brain seemed to block the ability to remember what happened next, everything was like a slow motion movie. As if the truth or a lie retold from mouth to mouth, playing a broken phone. Hot skin felt every touch three times stronger, everything went through goosebumps through the fabric of clothes, coming out as an acid kaleidoscope.

- «You are beautiful.» Izzy whispered through the broken film of neurons feeling how no logical thought would pass through your head.

- «It's a pill.» You answered, turning your gaze to him, half-open eyes, so sleeping, so drunk and so desirable. He, like Medusa Gorgon, turns you into stone with his gaze, grinding you into powder and inhaling it. All the songs grew like petals from your eyelashes, every blink like flowers bloomed in front of your eyes, letting the butterfly of his own eyes sit there and take all the feelings, like bees collecting pollen of secrets from where no one else has ever managed to get it.

- «No.» Izzy answered. «It's you.» His lips were next to your ear whispering a secret that only you will remember, only you will hear hoping that you will understand and he will not have to chew everything like for others. He knew that you will understand him more than others. They will not understand. You looked at him without blinking. The world seemed to be silent, only the projector clicked, the microphones hummed, somewhere in the distance someone was laughing, knocking over a beer bottle and a huge meteorite was already rushing towards the world, ready to blow up the planet. But even then there will be no silence, even then the music will continue to click on the temples bleeding from wounds, then the flowers will begin to grow again from the sent soil of the bloody rain of the dead. Then looking into his eyes you will find peace that no one has ever been able to give you, there the gardens will always be greener and life will be better.

He ran his fingers over your cheeks letting himself breathe in air while his lips greedily cut the distance breaking the rules and stealing your kiss in the silence of minds. Izzy was not a stupid guy and missing an opportunity is definitely not about him. You answered without thinking while your lips danced in an intimate tango of secrets and his hands outlined your body like a map wanting to know where was what. Your cheeks, then shoulders, then your back where he slowly slid to the very bottom of your waist. Alcohol and drugs mixed into one whole clouding your gaze completely, closing it with imaginary curtains when his tongue slid into your mouth. You couldn't think straight anymore, your hand slipped under his shirt, leaving you wanting more, until he let out a short groan, lowering his hand from your cheek to your arm.

-«Hold up, tiger...» he muttered, pushing his lips away from yours, causing his black curls to tickle your face and drool to form a line between your lips.

-«Izzy what the-» you didn't have time to express your displeasure when he grabbed you by your shameless hand and dragged you away from the hall itself, pushing you away from all of those people again.

Disappearing from the stranger's view, he pushed the first door open that was indeed the staff room. Fuck everyone when he closed the door with the latch, leaning you against the door, no one would dare come in here while he was here with you.

- «I'm not done with you yet.» He whispered, connecting your lips again, his tongue immediately slid between them, meeting yours, to which he squeezed out a quiet but such a pleasant moan. This sound warmed the bottom of your stomach while butterflies flew up in goosebumps on your skin. Your tongues played with each other, tasting, while his hand was the first to begin the unfinished, sliding under his T-shirt to feel your skin. You did not lag behind him, playing with his black hair on the back of his head, gradually going down to his shoulders to take off his leather jacket, to which he ran his tongue along your lower lip, biting it.

- «Izzy?!» You gasped and whispered in surprise, slightly pushing him in the chest but not having anything against it in your head.

- «Sometimes I want to eat you alive. Just like that pill so that you will fill me completely, and not just my brain.» he whispered, freeing you from your stylized long-sleeved top, leaving you up in just your bra, feeling the cold of this damn room.

-«I never thought of you as a cannibal.» you whispered back with a smirk as he pounced on your neck, biting and licking you like a hungry animal, wanting so desperately to leave hickeys. His hands slid under your skirt, squeezing your butt brazenly.

-«Well…I am but with very precise tastes and they only include you. The rest are garbage.» he whispered in your ear, making you bite your already wounded lower lip. You raised your hand to grab his hair and gently rip him off you, to which he only responded with a groan and disapproval in the form of a frown. «Hey-»

-"Then stop testing me and go for it.» you said through an irritated grin, to which he only raised an eyebrow again, sensing your annoyance.

- «Say the magic word.» He smirked without moving but you could feel how hard it was for him to keep everything in his pants when you were around.

- «Now.» You looked into his eyes while grabbing his belt on his pants to which he only sighed heavily.

-«How bossy...but alright. Time to release that tiger from its cage.» He smirked giving you free rein to which he unfastened your bra freeing you from your main female problem and sucking on that place with such impudence that you stopped halfway to unzip his fly. His tongue licked your nipples so precisely and so skillfully that you had to sell your soul to the devil after seeing the stars right in front of your eyes. You pulled his pants down so they fell down where they belonged. Your fingers grabbed his hair again to which he only continued his game of being a milksop. «Your cherry is the best.» he stated from which you snorted.

- «You’re high.» you responded to his strange ramblings.

- «On you. And I want to OD.» he answered again greedily kissing you and pressing you to the door lifting your skirt up and tights down to feel you. When his fingers slid where they shouldn’t you moaned into his lips. His smirk started to turn you on so much that he just continued without wasting a second and turning the corner of your panties to slip where you want him.

- «Motherfucker..» you mumbled into his lips through groans at his obvious teasing, feeling how your whole body went numb and touch became more sensitive.

- «I don’t think you will accent me having it with your mom rather than with you.» he inserted one finger, pushing away from you and checking your reaction. Sometimes he was so annoying and you wanted to hit him.

- «Than..Than…ugh! You piss me off!.» you sighed it at his movements, trying to release your energy from within and not die from an excess of emotions, looking into his eyes, to which he just amusingly snorted. Damn you, Stradlin.

- «I’m not and you know it.» His movements were impatient but very precise which made you wonder how much of experience he really have. Then the second finger entered and then you just kissed him while he pressed himself against you letting him feel how much you were the reason for his desire. He pulled away again and every time he did it, you wanted to press him back like an oxygen tube without which you can’t live. His long tongue licked those fingers that he pulled out of you with satisfied grin at which you laughed.

-«Tasty?» you joked at which he nodded.

- «As it should be.» and here again his lips and yours connected while his hands lifted you up by your thighs freeing themselves from any fabric and what had been bothering you before. Thoughts didn’t add up and common sense died before your eyes as he slowly entered you, making you both feel the highest kind of pleasure. You knew what sex was but he knew more. Your understanding did not go beyond groupies or rock stars. You just understood how much this thing was needed when the adrenaline was jumping up to the ceiling. His hands grabbed your thighs so tightly, pushing into you while your back was pressed against that very unfortunate door. Gasp, moans, short sighs and ragged breathing filled the room while you and Izzy were a puzzle for each other, the air you both breathe and the food you both consume.

- «So who are we now?…Who are we to each other?» you suddenly asked him through the blur, smeared images and incomprehensible sounds that came from inside your ears, pollinating your mind with fear that someone might catch you. But even if this happens, no one will remember your faces, but you wanted to remember Izzy's face. You didn’t know what to think or feel, but you knew that you wanted Izzy and you must stay with him until the very end. Until the north star goes out.

- «You are my oxygen. You are what I want to breathe every day.» He admitted through heavy and ragged breathing, feeling how with each push the knot in his lower abdomen was getting tighter. His immunity became stable because of you, you became the one who gives him the opportunity to breathe evenly.

- «Naive to the point of horror.» You answered through a giggle, to which he didn’t stop, continuing to mix your bodies together, like forbidden chemicals that do not work with each other but cannot react without each other. Paradox.

- «Whoever told you this is a complete idiot.» Izzy muttered, pressing his lips to your ears and making the last push with a rather drawn-out groan, releasing himself and letting you know that he was not joking, even under a pile of substances the picture is washed away, but you will not forget his words.

«I will love you very much even under the effect of the vitamin in my head.» he whispered to end this long night.

Conflicted Chapter 31:

Maddy P.O.V

“I love you so much baby.” Izzy groaned as he rammed into me continuously, rocking the bed by his speed.

“I love you t-too.” I whimpered feeling my orgasm about to take over.

“Your never gonna leave me again right?”

Not even for him?” he whined almost pleading me to answer.

l was too euphoric to mutter a response as I felt Izzy sucking the sensitive parts of my neck.

Leaving them all bruised and purple.

“Say something Maddy please.” he urged not letting himself release until he heard exactly what he wanted from me.

“Yes. It’s you Izzy. It’s always been you.” I croaked looking up at him, pouting and seeing his hazel eyes that I missed so much.

He leaned in and gave me the sloppiest kiss, leaving strings of wetness as he pulled away and came inside of me making sure I took every last drop.

“Such a good girl f’me huh.” he said giving my ass a slap and plopping down beside me.

I quickly covered myself feeling sudden shame from being naked like this inside of a trailer with Izzy knowing my brother still wasn’t talking to me and here I was slutting it up with one of his best friends.

“What’s wrong?” Izzy asked as he sat up, grabbing his pants and slipping them on, letting them hang loosely around his waist as he let up a fresh cigarette.

“I feel guilty for doing this while Duff is still ignoring me.” I sighed feeling my lips pout and tears silently rolling down my cheek.

“Your grown enough to make your own decisions Maddy.”

“If Duff doesn’t approve he needs to get over it.” he replied gruffly.

“I know but he’s my brother Izzy. If he’s upset then it affects me too.” I replied angrily.

“Why are you being such a little girl over it. I didn’t get with you to handle your tantrums.”

“Why are you being so mean.” I huffed wiping my tear stained cheeks and climbing off the bed to confront him face to face.

“I’m not. I just think you’re overly sensitive and I don’t want to deal with a cry baby post fuck.” he casually responded letting out a cloud of smoke as he ran a hand through his black locks.

“You’re such a jerk.” I cried pushing him out of my way to exit the trailer.

I didn’t even know where to go since all the boys including my brother were rehearsing backstage so I just waited outside feeling helplessly guiltier by the second.

I was just another idiot who decided to sneak away with Izzy back into his bed. I didn’t even wanna leave my brother while he was practicing his drums because I planned on talking to him once and for all to figure things out.

But instead he caught a glimpse of Izzy kissing all over my neck while gripping my ass as we both snuck away to go to his trailer which I doubt my brother didn’t know of.

I heard the trailer door open and close.

Izzy came out to let me know he was going back to rehearse with the boys and asked if I wanted to join.

“I don’t feel comfortable being near you while you’re mad at me.” I retorted rolling my eyes at him like the dumb little girl I was.

I wasn’t even that much younger than him.

It was only a 6 year gap which he made seem like it was ages apart.

Twenty five and Nineteen weren’t that far apart.

Right?

“Come on. You know Duff will kill me for leaving you all alone out here.” he groaned.

“You don’t even care about me.” I said feeling utterly rejected at that point.

He came over towards me in long strides and pulled me up harshly by my arms placing of his arms on my lower back squishing me all the way into him while having the other hand on my cheek.

“What don’t you understand Maddy. I don’t act this way with any girl.”

“I don’t even have any emotions towards the girls I fuck or that try and talk to me.”

“You make me feel so many different emotions at once I don’t know how to act sometimes. I know I shout at you but I really feel something for you that I’ve never felt with any girl which drives me crazy especially when Duff says I can’t be around you.”

“I’m so in love with you. I want to fuck you and make love to you at the same time all the damn time. I want to kiss you everywhere when I see you. You’re always so fucking beautiful and sexy. And you have the sweetest personality which is the total opposite of me. You’re so fucking nice it kills me sometimes because I could never be that nice to you but that’s why I want to be around you all the time because you pull me in with your sweetness. You make me feel so good about myself, like someone genuinely cares for me.”

“God I wish I could fuck you right here against this trailer so everyone can see how much I want to make you mine.” he grunted swiping his tongue on my lips until I parted them feeling his tongue against mine.

“Izzz. Someone will see us.” I giggled against his kisses.

“That’s what makes it so fun baby.” he groaned grabbing my legs to wrap around his waist as he grinded his erection against me.

The parking lot where all the bands had parked their trailers was silent expect for small “uh, uh, uh.” whimpers that left my mouth like a chorus.

Izzy had me pinned against GNR’s trailer with my tiny skirt hiked up, rubbing my pussy up and down his clothed erection keeping my legs tightly gripped.

“Give it to me baby. Cream all over my fucking pants.” he grunted pinning me against the trailer further to help grip me as I bounced up and down feeling my pussy get slicker with the friction of his jeans.

“Izzy?”

“Is that you man?” Duff barked as he saw me looking disheveled and seeing my ass out as I bounced up and down Izzy.

“S-stop stop. Put me down Iz .” I gasped slightly out of breath due to the nature of our activities.

“I’m gonna fucking murder you.” my brother muttered watching as I fixed my clothes into place while Izzy readjusted himself in his pants rolling his eyes.

“It’s not like she didn’t want it Duff.” he said shaking him off.

“Fuck you motherfucker.” was the last thing Izzy heard as he fell to the ground.

authors note

wht did we think :)) i’m back! i’ve been rlly busy w school so apologies!

Conflicted: Ch.29 🎀

Maddy P.O.V:

He came down looking smug as ever. Not a care in the world judging by the way his clothes were half on.

“When did this happen?” he asked gesturing with his finger to Axl and I.

“Doesn’t matter. Deal with it.” Axl huffed, ushering past me to help move my suitcases out of the way of the front entrance of the home.

“Izzy babe-yy come back.” a voice whined from behind the tall bassist.

It was that Pamela girl from that day at the show in Seattle.

“Oh wow. What a surprise to see you here!” she sarcastically grinned tugging on Izzy’s arm as she used his shoulder to balance her chin on for support.

Izzy was too dazed to notice Pamela was leaning all over him as he thought about all those restless nights he spent trying to get over Maddy.

“Yeah….well it’s nice to see someone has moved on…I guess.” I whispered at the end, trembling on my own words.

“Wait baby-I mean Maddy.” he called out rushing down the steps to grab her familiar hands in his.

“Please don’t.” I croaked fighting back tears remembering the hurt he caused me when I waited all those nights to hear a phone call but never did.

“Look, I know what it looks like but she means nothing to me. I promise she’s just an easy lay when I’m fucked up and can’t think straight.” he rambled attempting to ease my concern while he rubbed my arms vigorously with the pads of his fingers.

“I don’t know what’s worse. Waiting all those nights for you to finally call me and tell me you missed me as much as I missed you….or coming here to find you with her of all people.”

“I couldn’t okay?!? I couldn’t stand to call you after letting you leave that night. I felt like a fucking coward.” he sighed releasing himself from me to run his hands through his hair.

“I waited day and night. And you couldn’t even give me a simple apology?” I shouted letting my tears stream down freely.

“I’m sorry Maddy. I fucked up I know, but you should know that I fucking love you so much baby.” he pleaded wrapping an arm around my waist to pull me in for a forced kiss.

“Urgh. Get off me. You’re drunk.” I grimaced wiping my mouth as I stormed off, shaking with anger.

“Get your shit together.” Slash said making Izzy feel like a complete fuck up.

“Oh and you should leave sweetheart. I would borrow you if the time was right but not today.” Slash added leaving Pamela outraged as she grabbed her heels and fled downstairs and out the door fuming.

“What’s her deal?” Steven asked walking in confused with a hand in his hair and drumsticks in the other.

……

“Hey, so Duff found out you’re staying with me for awhile and decided not to come.” Axl said as he rounded the table to come sit next to me.

“This day is officially the worst day ever.” I groaned running my hands through my hair, to help diminish the oncoming migraine.

“Don’t let em get to you. They’re just acting out but in a few days they’ll both come around.”

“No. Duff is acting out. Izzy is just guilty because he got caught fucking Miss Pammy, his favorite slut.” I spat thinking about earlier today and seeing her cover herself with nothing but a small towel.

“I came to get you here so we could talk about us. Not Izzy, yet you can’t seem to stop talking about him.” Axl complained shaking his leg up and down.

“I’m sorry okay?!?!…

“I stayed up all those nights waiting for him to call and he never did. Imagine loving somebody and being split apart from them against your own will and come to find out they didn’t even try to reach out to you.” I cried clearly still upset about the whole ordeal.

Axl didn’t say a word and instead quietly got up from his seat and disappeared behind his walls.

I got up to follow him and didn’t see him anywhere in sight so I decided to go up the stairs and see if he went into his room for the night only to walk into the wrong room.

Why is this my life.

“Wrong room.” he retorted, rolling his eyes.

“Y’know what. Fuck you Izzy.” I shouted.

“What did you just say?” he asked getting up from his spot on the bed to walk over towards me and grab my wrist with his hand firmly.

“Let me go.” I whined uncomfortable with his sudden demeanor change.

“How many times do I have to apologize Maddy? I’m sorry.”

“I really am.” he sighed getting go of my wrist only to grab my hand in his, interlocking fingers.

“No. I’m not doing this again.” I stated letting go of his hand to exit his room until he blocked my way forcing me to face him.

“Please. I promise I thought about you every fucking night, every day. I fucked all those girls because I thought it would help me get over you but it didn’t work. It made it worse.” he told me hovering close to my face with a stern grip on my waist.

“I-I don’t beleive you.” I whispered looking down at my hands as I played with the bracelet I had on, not ready to face those eyes of his that I missed so much.

“Will you beleive me if I told you the whole time….when I was fucking Pamela I closed my eyes and imagined it was you that was making me feel good.” he muttered close to my ear.

“S-stop it Izzy.” I whined pushing against his tall frame which stayed put.

“Maddy? Are you in there?”

Axl

—————————————————————

-i know it’s not a lot but i tried to keep up where i left off for u all!! <3hope u all enjoy ittt

would u all be interested if i made an ig group for everyone 2 communicate & send mssgs in,,, like a little 80’s rock group? <33🎀🫶🏼💗

Conflicted Chapter 28🎀:

Maddy P.O.V

After two weeks of rotting in my bed, I summoned the nerve to seek out Axl again after he requested that I visit him.

He contacted me about a month ago and tried to call again, but I wasn't feeling well and had avoided meeting or talking to anyone for the past few weeks because I was still dealing with the Izzy situation.

What made it even more difficult for me was the fact that Izzy never called; every day, I would wake up and travel down the stairs to ask my mother if he had.

She would discreetly shake her head and give me a pity look, which I despised since I didn't want my mother to feel bad for believing someone like Izzy would bother to contact me

“Maddy!”

“What?” I replied, glancing up from my bowl of cereal, wondering if I was talking aloud and whether my mother had heard me.

“Axl called again, he’s asking for you. I think you should answer hon.” she insisted, feeling sympathy for the redhead who had attempted to contact her daughter, unlike Izzy, which made her like him even more.

“Alright.”

…..

“Maddy?”

“Hi Axl.” I muttered holding the phone closer to my ear as I felt it slip out of my sweaty hands, all of a sudden nervous.

“I’ve been trying to reach you, but your mom said you weren’t feeling well. So, I thought maybe…. your feeling better?” he asked.

“I-Well…honestly,I’ve been avoiding your calls and I wasn’t feeling so good.” I sighed.

“I figured,..…..I’ve missed you, so has Duff y’know. I think you should give him a call.”

"No, thanks,….and if you called to get me back on good terms with my brother, who embarrassed me and never apologized, then no." I spat, eager to hang up.

"Okay, just hear me out. Izzy's doing good. But your brother isn't doing so well, and he's still upset with Izzy, which is disrupting our live shows." he explained.

"I couldn’t care less about Izzy,….my brother knows what he did." I lied, simply because I was too stubborn to accept that I had made a mistake by choosing Izzy to have my heart, and now I had to face the consequences.

"I guess you're right…..so, why don't you come visit me here? Maybe after seeing everyone, you'll feel better?" he asked, holding on by a thread.

“Like who?” I scoffed.

“Slash and Steven. Those two ask about you all the time y’know.”

I cringed when I heard those two names because they had nothing to do with the fight that had broken out that night, but rather with the falling out. I felt horrible for not communicating with them because I knew they meant well and I adored them both, especially Slash.

He was also the one who cared the most about me when I was fighting with Izzy or Axl.

“Fine. But I’m only coming to see Slash or Steven and maybe…you.” I spoke into the telephone.

“Great. I’ll fly you out and I’ve already spoken with your mom about the idea and she’s fine with it.” he told me, grinning on the other side of the phone.

“See you then I guess.” I replied, ending the phone call and letting out a deep breathe.

I was already regretting agreeing to this.

… … …

“Maddy! Over here!” I heard a voice yell from across the L.A.X airport.

My flight had left yesterday, late night, so when I landed it was practically morning in the sunny city of Los Angeles.

“Yes I see you.” I sighed, rolling my eyes at the sudden memories that came rushing back as soon as I spotted Axl and his red hair that were full of past memories.

He slipped past me at first, not recognizing my newly dyed hair, which was now shoulder length and half the length of his, giving me a little grown-up appearance but still appearing young and emphasizing my baby face.

“Oh wow. You look different.” he muttered taking a good look at me, up and down.

“Thanks?...” I replied, raising an eyebrow, wondering what he had meant by that.

“You look good obviously.” he added, playfully rolling his eyes as he pulled me into his embrace, squishing my face on his shoulder.

“I have the car out front.” he exclaimed, collecting my luggage as he led me out the massive airport's sliding doors and into the welcoming sun, as well as the hot wind that blasted me as soon as we stepped outside of the shade.

We spotted his car and rushed to it when Slash emerged out of the driver's seat to help me with all of my bags.

“Slash?” I squealed, finally happy to see someone who I genuinely missed.

“Hey! You’re not Maddy, what have you done with her and her blonde hair.” he teased, scrunching my hair, as he picked it up and examined it with his fingers, through his dark shades.

“I thought it looked good.” I huffed, matching his playful banter as I pouted and put both hands on my hips.

“It does. I’m just playin.” he smiled, pulling me into his chest with an arm around my shoulder.

“Ok, ok….you both are best friends, we get it.”

“But we should go now or else it’ll get late and the traffic will suck.” he suggested, hopping into the driver’s seat.

“Wait, sit with me in the back?” I asked,pouting my lips at Slash who was already halfway sat in the front passenger seat.

“Ok alright.” he agreed, softly slapping my shoulder before joining me in the back.

“So how is Izzy?” I asked Axl, who met my eyes in the rear view mirror upon hearing Izzy’s name being mentioned.

“He’s uh good. Why?”

“Just curious..” I replied, looking out the window at the familiar scenery I drove past not too long ago.

“Izzy’s been banging chicks left and right.” Slash laughed, unable to contain his jokes causing me to frown.

“Hey, it’s okay.” he cooed.

“Izzy doesn’t deserve someone as beautiful and pure as you anyways.” Slash told me, stroking my hair in an attempt to lift my frown.

Which wasn’t working because now my stomach felt all queasy and I wanted nothing more than for Axl to turn the car back around to the airport.

How little did I mean to him.

“We’re going to my house and I think all the guys will be there, so, just a heads up Maddy.” Axl told me, wincing.

“Whatever. I don’t care.” I sighed, leaning into Slash and resting my head on his inviting shoulder.

He pulled me closer in his arms and stroked my arm.

When we arrived at his place, I couldn't help but feel anxious about seeing Izzy again, and my fingers began to shake involuntarily. But I tried to remain composed and fearless as we climbed up the steps to Axl's new house, which was more accurately characterized as a mansion.

“Don’t be nervous. He’s probably just as nervous knowing you’re showing up.” Axl told me, patting me on the shoulder.

“Hey guys!” Steven exclaimed as he opened the door, reaching out to embrace me first and picking me up to spin.

“I missed you Maddy.” he told me, putting me down.

“I missed you too Stevie.” I pouted, feeling guilty about never properly saying goodbye to him.

“Okay, go on inside before the annoying neighbor comes back to complain about the noise.” Slash groaned, pushing me into the home as he followed behind.

Axl's house was skillfully decorated with bold tones, brightness, and lovely hues on the tiles and walls of the large house. He had also hung several art frames around the empty space, including a few photographs of Gun N Roses from their early days, as well as a couple of vinyls, to match the images to the songs played in the pictures.

“Your home is beautiful Axl.” I gleamed, looking around the surprisingly artistic place.

“Thanks. I had my ex girlfriend help me with a lot of the things around the house.” he nervously chuckled.

“Right.” I emphasized on the t, suddenly remembering the brunette that was once around.

“Axl what the fuck took so long?” I heard the familiar voice of Izzy call out.

Fuck fuck fuck.

“I thought you were just going to ge-……Maddy?”

Conflicted Chapter 27🎀:

Maddy P.O.V

The drive home from the concert was, to put it mildly, awful. I had no idea if I would be able to heal from the heartbreak I was currently experiencing.

I recalled hearing my friends talk about how heartbroken they were when they broke up with their lovers for the first time back in school, but I never realized how terrible it hurt until today.

But now I knew I had to stay away from L.A. for as long as possible in order to purge any memories of Izzy or anyone else from that band.

For sure I was going to miss Slash and Steven, but I honestly didn't want anything to do with them, and the best thing for me right now was to entirely disconnect from the group.

To tell the truth, I wasn't even sure if I wanted to see my brother again because he was the cause of everything that had gone wrong today, but it wouldn't have changed Izzy's decision to stay even if my brother had not said anything.

I guess I was rather irritated because my brother pointed out that Izzy did not love me enough to leave the band, which was not his fault.I suppose I was just a dumb young girl after all.

Axl P.O.V

To say I was upset at Maddy's decision to leave was an understatement, given that she was one of the rare girls I had met who, on occasions, I imagined having a true relationship with because she appeared to be and was different than every other girl I would stumble upon, who just slept around.

I knew she and Izzy were going to break up eventually, which is why I was trying to help her come to a swift decision, but instead she lashed out at me. If only she know I was only trying to help her, because, I didn't believe that Izzy would be as faithful as he appeared in front of her while she was away back home when we went on tour soon.

I've known him long enough to know that when he gets bored on the road, he likes to have company, specifically Pamela, and I knew Pamela was here for a reason, but when she saw Maddy, she became reluctant and backed off, not that Izzy was going to stop her advances regardless.

Izzy clearly cared about the girl, but I had the impression that he did not get along with her as well as I did. I believe we had something more unique than him, and I sensed it from the moment I met her.

“Bastard.”

“What?” I scoffed.

“I’m letting you know one last time to back off my girl.”

“Your girl?…Please, I saw you practically smoothing on Pam.” I scoffed.

“Oh man. Don’t act all innocent like you wouldn’t entertain it if a girl was coming into you, especially if they looked like Pam.” he retorted.

“Not if I had a girl like Maddy as my girlfriend.” I responded by immediately walking away from him, unable to handle being around him any longer without wanting to hit him square in the nose.

He followed after me, quickly, spinning me around roughly by my shoulder.

“The fuck.” I spat, shoving his hand.

“Listen motherfucker. Stay the hell away from my fucking personal life.” he roared, his eyes popping out, nostrils flared, and face flushed crimson with anger.

“No, you stay away from her.” I spit, getting in his face to let him know that I wasn’t intimidated.

“You just want to fuck her.”

“I already did.” I smirked, watching his face scrunch up with pure hatred.

“Your a piece of shit Axl.”

“You’re the one who was ready to take your pants off for a few quick seconds with Miss Pam.”

“You don’t know me.”

“I know you better than I know anyone.”

“…..If you think Maddy is in love with you than good luck.” he snickered, walking back to the dressing room smugly.

… … …

The next morning we awoke in Los Angeles. After such a lengthy absence, I was pleased to return to the city. But it didn't feel the same now that Maddy wasn’t here.

The city felt very different, a cold and lonely feeling she left behind, when her brother decided it was best for her to leave her, as for, Iz, to my surprise he was taking it hard and attempting to cope his feelings with whatever substances he sought.

Everyone was concerned about Iz and his recurring drug problems; not that they didn't have their own, but Izzy would usually take the most harsh substances and wind up messed up, which was bad for him and the band.

Duff and I weren't very concerned, though, because, well, for one, he had been too angry to care about his best friend’s drug problem, and he was still angry at his younger sister.

As for myself, I was in love with the girl the guy had broken up with, so I didn’t have a reason to care.

I sighed as I got out of bed and decided it was a good time to call Maddy and see what was going on with her. I grabbed my phone book and began searching through names and numbers to find Maddy's in order to get ahold of her before a drunken Izzy called her and professed his love over the phone only to wake up the next morning and never call her again.

After losing hope, I couldn't think of elsewhere to go until I came across for familiar name of her mother which was Alice.

It was definitely her mother, it had her home address on it.

I quickly grabbed a pen and scribbled down the phone number to the home address, and then hiding it somewhere Izzy couldn't get to, if he came over, and punched in the numbers, carefully punching in the numbers, picking up the device attached to the long spiral cord.

Brrrr

Brrrr

Br-

“Hello? Alice speaking.”

“Mrs. Mckagan, It’s Axl.”

“Oh, what a surprise! How are you doing honey?” her mother cheerfully asked.

“I’m good.” I chuckled.

“I was wondering if I could speak with Maddy by any chance?”

I wondered if she had told her mother what occurred that night.

"Oh, sure…..but, make sure Izzy isn’t around. I don't want him around her after seeing how upset she was the night I picked her up after their fight that night. She wouldn't even speak to me." she sighed, adjusting the phone cable to conceal the sound and signaling for Maddy to come down to answer the phone call.

“Hello?”

“Maddy….Its Axl.”

“I’m aware.”

“I wanted to ask how your doing and all y’know after tha-

“Good.” she interrupted, rather irritated that the touchy subject was brought up.

“Look, I was wondering if you would come visit me in L.A.?”

“Are you crazy!”

"My brother has basically blacklisted me from there, and I don't think I want to be around Izzy," she explained, her face sour at the mention of her now ex-boyfriend.

“Who gives a shit. You’re old enough to make your own goddamn decision.”

“And y’know, I was hopping maybe we could talk?” I added.

“Talk?”

“Yes.”

“Hm….so, what about?”

“Us.”

“There is no us Axl.” she huffed.

“Why do you just shut me off everytime the topic of us comes around?”

"I appreciate how much you care about me Axl but I think I need a break to think about everything before I decide to get into another relationship." she sighed.

I love you.

“But y’know how I feel about yo-

“I love you.”

The silence on the other line made me regret what I had said, but then she responded quickly with...

“I love you too.”

(short & sweet chapter …this series will end at 30 chapters so this is mostly a filler ! :))))

Conflicted Chapter 24🎀:

Maddy P.O.V

Slash left my room shortly after our conversation complaining that he needed a drink, and got up to stroll over to my window, where I found Axl resting on the pool recliner, deep in contemplation.

I sighed as my thoughts turned back to Izzy, wondering where he was and what he was doing. I walked downstairs to check for him while the boys were watching a hellish movie, which Axl later joined, totally overlooking me.

I didn't take offense and gave him some space, assuming I was giving him misleading signals.I feel like I gave Slash the wrong answer earlier when he asked who I expected to spend the rest of my life with, and I responded Axl mostly because I was angry with Izzy for becoming mad at Axl and me.

He was constantly angry at me when I spoke with Axl, which made me angry for the most part, especially because I was only having conversations with him.

But it appears he was right after all; I felt like an awful person for kissing Axl on the boat, but I wasn't going to tell him since I was certain he would never forgive me because he loathed Axl.

“Maddy, are you gonna stand there and stare or go back upstairs?” Duff groaned, throwing some popcorn at me, while Steven giggled throughout the scene that was playing, that involved a girl being fucked by a dude sporting a ghostface mask.

“What movie is this?” I asked, grimacing at the girl whose mascara was streaked over her cheeks and hair disheveled.

“It’s called Scream XXX.” Slash smirked, before returning his lustful gaze back to the female being aggressively penetrated with her hair yanked back.

“Go away Maddy.” Duff complained.

“Yeah.” Axl proceeded, reverting to his unpleasant attitude, laughing as he muttered something underneath his breath.

I ignored it and exhaled, deciding to head back upstairs, however just as I planned on calling it a night, I noticed the front door open and Izzy enter.

“Izzy!” I squealed and ran to hug him.

“He kissed you.” he spat as if he had been holding it in the entire time he was gone from me, followed with a catastrophic glare.

"It didn't mean anything to me I promise. I was thinking about you the whole time." I stated frantically, standing on my tiptoes and grasping his cheeks in my hands to ensure he understood.

“Just tell me one thing…do you love him?” he sighed, peering into my eyes as he waited for an answer.

“No I don’t.” I lied.

I heard Axl scoff as he whispered something under his breath behind us, and I turned around to meet his stare, sending him a softhearted look, but I couldn't do anything else since Izzy would have suspected that I loved him, so I dismissed Axl no matter how much it hurt.

"Let’s go upstairs, m'tired." he yawned, removing his long black coat to toss over the stair railing, wrapping his arm around my shoulder, pushing me close, as we headed up the steps.

We entered my room, and I turned off the lights, allowing my lamp to shine brightly, and switched on the television to watch something since I wasn't tired.

Izzy took off his shirt and boxers before slipping into bed and I also changed into my nightgown, a purple babydoll with white lace trim around the cleavage and the bottom hem.

“You look pretty.” he whispered reaching up one hand to stroke my hair that was combed straight allowing my soft blond hair to shine in the dim light, and my skin glow from exfoliating earlier in the shower and putting sweet smelling moisturizer all over my body for Izzy to later touch, allowing his hand to slide down my neck, caressing my collarbone down to my breast, massaging softly like a sensual massage.

“C’mere.” he demanded, grabbing my cheeks with his hand, squishing them together into a pout.

I tried to murmur a reply through his grip on my cheeks, gazing up at him with glossy eyes, while he teased me about repeating myself and speaking louder.

“You have to kiss me first.” he smirked.

I pushed myself forward slamming my lips onto his, while he kept his hold on my lips, in a pout, remaining his dominance, hungrily abusing my lips, until they were swollen and red.

He released his grip on my cheeks, leaving a faint red imprint on each side from how deeply his fingers dug into me while making out.

“I want you to touch me all over my body and make love to me." I whispered, allowing my babydoll nightgown to fall past my hardened nipples before catching his hand in mine and guiding him to my breast, stroking it while keeping my hand over his.

He dragged down the rest of my dress, allowing it to fall past my ankles so he could massage and touch every inch of my skin that appeared to be gleaming with tiny diamonds from the strawberry lotion I had applied earlier.

I squirmed under his touch feeling his cold hands touching everywhere before gently spreading my thighs leaning forward to suction over the soft plushy skin as his chain dangled forward ticking the top of clit.

“I love this pussy. So fucking beautiful like my baby.” he cooed, as he closed his eyes placing a big wet kiss on my outer lips making me squeal.

I played with my breasts, circling my nipples with my eyes closed, releasing soft whimpers and quiet open mouthed moans as I felt him make out with my lower region, licking, sucking, and spitting on it while taking his time to play with my clit, occasionally rubbing it with his pointer and ring fingers.

“Izzy keep g-going. Uhnn- gonna cum.” I whined, huffing and grabbing onto his long black locks of hair as I desperately rutted my needy hips against his tongue, panting out for more.

He slapped my ass before pulling away with a trail of my juices connecting himself to my pussy, not wanting me to orgasm just yet.

“You’re gonna cum on my cock.” he groaned, collecting strings of my wetness on his dick by sandwiching his cock in between my sticky lips, mixing his precum with my arousal, before slipping inside me very slowly so I could feel it going inside.

“Fuuck, you’re so tight.”

“Hmph, for you I-Iz, only for you.” I cried, feeling his cock deep inside me, creating an outline on my stomach, as he carefully thrust in and out of me like I was very delicate and could break at any time, kissing my neck leaving vivid purple spit covered bruises.

I kissed him eagerly, enjoying being covered in his spit while he passionately kissed me, slowly drawing away each time, making sure that there was a loud pop every time we separated.

“You like being drenched in my spit baby?” Izzy whispered adjusting himself before slamming back into my wet heat keeping the same steady pace, as I squeezed onto him tightly feeling my orgasm approaching.

“Y-Yes l-love it.” I blabbered, moaning small “uh”s.

“Gotta go slow, in this fucking tight ass pussy.” he groaned unable to concentrate, as he was about to blow his load.

“I love you.” I whined, grabbing his face, loving the feeling of his lips brushing against mine.

He quickened his thrust as he felt me clench around him and my eyes rolled back, my mouth dropping wide in a faint moan as he massaged my clit, making me spasm and my legs shake.

“I love you I love you I love you.” he chanted filling my pussy with warm spurts of his cum, letting it dribble down my thigh.

“Mmph, m’tired now too.” I whimpered, cuddling into him as I nodded off.

“Goodnight baby.” he whispered covering us with the sheets.

… … …

“Maddy.” someone kept whispering, waking me up and making me glance on drowsily.

Izzy was fast asleep next to me, and my gaze shifted to the cracked door, through which Axl's head could be seen.

“Come here.” he said again, moving his hand in an inviting motion for me to approach him.

I groaned, getting out of bed.

“What is it?”

“Since you don't love me and all, I think it would be best to come clean about what you said to me that night on the boat." he casually stated, catching me off guard.

“Wait what? I- I didn’t -

“Save it.” he spit, clenching his jaw while he rolled his eyes.

“I won’t tell him anything.” I firmly replied.

“Oh really?” he rhetorically asked, raising a brow.

“Izzy doesn’t need to know anything because it doesn’t matter.”

“You can’t tell me that the way I feel about you doesn’t matter to you.”

“I- No of course, it does. But, I’m with Izzy and I have to put him above anybody.”

“I didn’t take you for a bitch, but I guess I was wrong about that too.” he muttered as he quickly walked away.

I sighed, letting my head fall against the wall, annoyed with the entire situation that I appeared to have created.

“Is everything okay? I thought I heard someone arguing?” Izzy inquired, peeking out my door.

“Everything is just fine.” I sighed, slipping between him and my door.

Meanwhile, Axl was downstairs rambling on about Maddy, unknowing to everyone but Slash, who had spoken with the young girl the night the two men argued.

She was unhappy with Izzy that day and erratically mentioned Axl. But the curly haired guitarist knew better because of the way Maddy acted with Izzy, she was blindly in love with the man, but Axl was a ticking time bomb, and he couldn't stand being tossed aside by anyone, let alone the girl he loved.

It was just a matter of time before he flipped out on Izzy again, and Maddy would be dragged into it indefinitely this time.

Conflicted Chapter 23🎀:

Maddy P.O.V

The next morning, I awoke to the sound of the television blaring downstairs and the scent of pancakes filling my nose, leaving me hungry.

When I went downstairs, I expected to see all of the boys because I had heard such loud conversation, but there was only Axl and my mother.

"Madeleine, you're awake!”

“I made fresh pancakes for Axl, and you are welcome to join." My mother radiated as if delighted by the young redhead standing by her

“You're up early." I smirked and swiped a stack of pancakes from his plate.

"Well, I couldn't sleep in and miss this beauty." he cracked a grin referring to my mother, who was completely flushed.

“Okay, enough flirting young man. I am old enough to be your grandmother. Now sit and eat with Maddy." she said before turning off the stove and leaving us with orange juice and going to watch her favorite TV show that was airing currently, which was causing all the ruckus.

“I like your house. It’s very cozy.”

"Thanks. It's practically yours now; you're allowed to use it whenever you want." I smiled before biting into my maple syrup-soaked pancakes.

“I wanted to ask you something.”

“Sure.”

"We have a concert coming up here, so we decided to stay at yours until then, but I wanted to see the city and the people, and I wondered if I could get that favor relayed from when I took you out to see L.A." he chuckled, leaning forward on his hand and beaming at me, waiting for me to say yes.

“Okay deal." I responded, and he applauded and finished the remainder of his pancakes before putting them up.

"Izzy won't this like." I informed him, sighing as I remembered that I needed to tell him about this.

“What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” he shrugged, leaving to join my mother on the couch.

I shrugged his statement off as I hurried upstairs with a fresh batch of pancakes and fruit for Izzy, as well as some orange juice.

He was awake when I got in my room, and it appeared that he had already freshened up; his hair was wet from the shower, and the towel was loosely wrapped around his waist.

"I brought you some food baby." I murmured, coming to get on my knees behind him on the bed, where he was sitting on the edge of the bed, and wrapped my arms around his neck.

“I missed you.” he mumbled, tilting his head back to meet my lips in a kiss.

He gave me light pecks first before opening his mouth to give me wet French kisses, in contrast to my slow rhythm, which allowed him to control me.

I climbed around him to sit on his lap as he proceeded to kiss me, our lips clashing with a pop every time we pulled away.

“Eat first." I smirked, mocking him as I slipped from his lap and went to get dressed for the day, leaving him with a hard on and baffled.

"Maddy, come on please. You made me hard; jerk me off or something," he begged, rubbing himself to relieve some of his pain.

“How about I do this?" I chirped, kneeling in front of him, innocently staring up at him through my lashes as I caressed his thighs.

He pulled the towel off himself, letting it fall on the floor, before gripping the back of my head and thrusting his cock down my throat without warning.

“If you want to be a tease, you have to fucking deal with this,"

“I-Izz, -slow." I gasped, releasing his cock and coughing some of his precum and spit onto my shirt, which became moist.

“Take it off. I want to see your tits." he motioned for me to remove my shirt, exposing my breasts since I hated sleeping in a bra.

“Fuck no bra?" he moaned, twisting and massaging them before slapping his cock on my lips and sliding it between my pouted lips, teasing me before I put it inside my mouth.

I hallowed my cheeks and bobbed up and down quickly, using my empty hand to massage his balls in the same way that I had heard the girls at my school did with their boyfriends.

I let go of his cock, leaving it a slimy mess, then took one of his balls into my mouth, sucking and tugging at it like it was a tasty popsicle I couldn't get enough of, before switching to the other and stroking him off at the same time.

“Fuuckk. You're so good, baby, such a good girl sucking my cock like this," he groaned, clutching a fistful of hair.

I let go of his balls and returned to his cock, stroking the area that wouldn't fit into my mouth, and gazed up at him with lust ridden eyes, reminding him how much I enjoyed it

"Shit, you're so damn good at this. Better than any other girl I've had."

When I heard that, I pulled away and glared at him, awkwardly holding his dick in my hand.

“What’s wrong baby?” he asked, wondering why I had stopped and looked at him weirdly.

“Nothing…I just realized that I don't want to do anything under my mom's roof." I said gently just above a whisper, as I pulled my sticky fingers from his cock and quietly picked up my clothes before closing the bathroom door behind me.

“Maddy? Did I do something wrong?” he called out apologetically.

"Everything is fine." I said, brushing away my tears, and stepping into the shower.

I didn't want to make a big issue about it, but everything came crashing down when he told me I was better than any girl he'd ever had.

Which made me think about how many girls he's probably had in comparison to me, who's had zero.

And the first thing that sprang to mind when he said that was the groupie who gave him a blowjob, which immediately turned me off and made me unhappy.

It wasn't his fault, but I couldn't stop thinking about it.

And how he reacted when my mother mentioned marriage, he just laughed it off, which bothered me a lot, even though I didn't bring it up with him because I didn't want him to think I'm some obsessive love-stricken girl.

But I did believe that marriage was important, and that in the future, I would like to have one eventually.

I heard the door close, indicating that he had left, and sighed, turning up the heat in the shower and relishing the peacefulness of the water.

What I didn’t remember what was that our guest room which used to be my brother’s had a connecting door to the bathroom that I had.

So when the door opened from the other side of the bathroom and in walked Axl , I let out a scream upon seeing his shadow behind the flimsy bathroom curtain.

“Oh my god. Get out I’m taking a shower!” I yelped, almost slipping on the water that was gathered around my feet.

“It’s just me.” Axl shrugged off, like it wasn’t a big deal to him that he was inside the bathroom the same time as myself.

“I’m taking a shower!” I repeated.

"Izzy is hogging it downstairs and refuses to come out. I’m pretty sure I heard him jerking off..trouble in paradise?" he questioned, smirking behind the curtain, as I heard his pants zipper open.

"Gosh. Everything's fine, okay!" I grumbled fiercely clawing my head to remove all of the shampoo so that I could leave as quickly as possible.

… … …

Everyone was having a good stay so far at our house, and Duff and I finally got to talk in private to make up.

I apologized to him for my behavior at the airport, and he understood because I was rightfully unhappy at the moment.

He also apologized to me as we hugged it out, and I couldn't be happier that my brother and I were back on the same page.

In honor of that, Duff wanted to take the boys out for drinks because they were behaving and doing a good job of staying sober during their time here, so he decided everyone earned it, including Izzy, who happily accepted.

I didn't tell them I didn't want to go, but instead told them I wasn't feeling well.

Izzy immediately turned down Duff upon hearing this and said he would stay back to look after me, but Axl stepped in and told him he was staying back anyway because he was trying to rest his vocal chords before their gig, to which the boys blindly accepted.

Except Izzy.

Izzy and Axl were arguing over who would stay back to watch over me when Duff became irritated and told them both to figure it out like men, then stated he would wait outside for those who wanted to join.

I felt bad about convincing Izzy to join them so Axl and I could go out, but I needed to get this out of the way so we could enjoy the rest of his time here, by ourselves.

"Are you sure?" Izzy asked for the fourth time, gazing back and forth between Axl and me.

“I’m sure baby. Go have fun.” I smiled, kissing him on the cheek before gently pushing him through the door.

“Fine, but tell Axl to keep his hands off you. I don’t trust him." he told me, holding my hands in his as if begging with me not to do something.

“Don’t worry.” I said, and with that, Izzy was on his way to the bar with the boys while I was getting ready for my “outing” with Axl.

I kept it casual and wore my short white sundress, with some socks and black flats and tied my hair back in a ponytail.

He wore his ripped jeans and a graphic tee with some white sneakers and a red bandana was wrapped around his head.

“You ready?” I asked.

“Yes, ma'am. Lead the way.” he signaled for me to leave the home first, to which he followed me to the car, hopping in the passenger seat since he was the guest.

“Buckle up.” I muttered, pulling out of the driveway and heading to our first location on my list of places to see in Seattle.

… … …

"And lastly, this is the ferry which I used to ride all the time with Duff when we were younger." I emphasized showing him our final stop with the big neon lights that read OPEN illuminating the pier for locals to line up and patiently wait for the next vessel to return.

“Let’s go.” Axl grinned.

“You actually want to go on it?”

“Yeah. Why not.” he shrugged going up to the ticket booth to pay for two tickets and coming back to wait in line.

“You didn’t have to pay for me y’know.” I sighed.

“I wanted too. Especially when I have such a beautiful lady by my side tonight, I want to give her the best treatment.”

I could only smile as the person from the ticket booth came back shortly after to collect everyone's tickets, including ours, and begin boarding the small boat.

Axl guided me onto the boat, holding my hand as I climbed the steps, while he hopped in behind me and seated us on the top roof, where there were just a few couples sitting in the back, leaving the front wide open for us to sit freely.

The city lights shone brightly as the boat went off into the black waters, which were only illuminated by the approaching boats returning back to the dock, darkening the waters again when they left.

The boat operator told us about the history of the city, while Axl listened tentatively, as if he were genuinely interested in learning, which made me smile, knowing that he was enjoying this short ride as much as I did as a child.

As we further away from the city, it looked like a different planet and smaller than it appeared, as we went by the larger-than-life mountains, accompanied by a chilling breeze.

I wasn't prepared for the cold and shuddered a little as my dress flowed up against the hard winds. Axl noticed this and slid closer to me, wrapping an arm around me, which I hesitated before nestling in since I was so cold I could not take it any longer.

“You look beautiful tonight.” Axl whispered, while I stared at the distant city lights, accompanied by the water that was constantly sloshing against the small boat.

“Thank you Axl.”

“I think you’re one of the most beautiful girls I’ve ever met.”he said again, this time close enough to my ear that I could feel his breath on my bare neck and his fingers delicately placed on my collarbone, stroking it.

“T-Thanks.” I mumbled, scooting away from him, to which he frowned and slid back towards me.

“Look at me.”

When I turned to face him, I felt his soft lips on mine and a hand snake around my back, forcing me against him and his musky cologne.

He kissed me deeper and more firmly, when I didn’t pull away as if he had planned this for a long time.

“N-no." I said before racing off and down the boat's side staircase to the first floor balcony, hanging onto the railing, attempting to regain my breath after what I had just done.

“I'm sorry for scaring you off, but I'll do it again if it means you'll realize I love you." he sputtered out of breath as he ran down the steps after me.

“Axl, I know how I feel about you, and you do too, but we can't be together. It's not right." I blabbered, panicking over the idea that I had technically cheated on Izzy.

“It is right." he reassured me, grabbing my wrists and pinning me to his body.

“If you don't want this…then stop me." he whispered, moving my hair away from my face to display my eyes, which glinted.

“Your…..mine.”

“I-

He suppressed me with a kiss, gently tugging my bottom lip with his teeth before intertwining his tongue with mine, refusing to let go.

“Fuck, I know your Izzy’s but that wouldn’t stop me from fucking the shit out of you.” he groaned.

“Ahem.” a young boy said, making me jump unlike Axl who was still holding me in place.

“Is there a problem?” Axl asked, irritated at the little boy for interrupting his little moment with Maddy.

“U-uh no I was just looking for the bathroom.” the boy whispered, scampering off, scared by Axl’s deep voice.

“Axl that was mean.” I laughed pushing him off me and scrunching my face.

“What! He’s just a little rascal, he was probably watching you from far away anyways.”

The sound of the bell ringing from above us signaled the boat's arrival at dock, prompting me to reflect on the consequences of what was to come after what had just happened between Axl and me.

“We should go." I whispered my voice barely coming out, while I couldn't bear to look him in the eyes, feeling dirty from cheating on my lover.

Axl saw an abrupt shift in my behavior, which upset him, but he didn't nudge me further and instead gave me some space while continuing to walk beside me through the city.

We called an Uber home, and the ride back was completely silent as I slumped in the window seat, peering out at the metropolis that seemed as small as a bug in the sea.

When we came back to the house, the boys had already returned an hour before, and as soon as we opened the door and saw Axl walk in behind me, everyone raised their eyebrows, and Izzy was furious.

“Where the hell did you both go?” he growled, looking at the sundress I was wearing and the way I looked put together as if we were on a date.

“Chill out, Izzy!" I barked, glaring at him for being so irritating about Axl every-time we came into contact.

He looked horrified, as if I had cursed at him, but I was so confused with protecting Axl and feeling guilty that I hurried upstairs, stomping on the way.

“I told you to stay the fuck away from her.” Izzy spit, shoving Axl against the door causing him to groan.

“The fuck is your deal. We were just hanging.” Axl persisted driving his bandmate into the stair railing.

Izzy fumed as he fixed himself back up.

“Did you finally convince her to let you have another fuck or give you a blowjob this time?” the slim guitarist sneered, making Duff upset.

“Don’t talk about my sister like that.”

“I kissed her! Is that what you want to hear?” the redhead yelled, enraging the guitarist beyond belief.

“I knew it! I fucking knew it. Fuck you.” he grumbled shoving Axl and leaving the house with a loud slam.

“He’s definitely getting laid tonight.” Slash snickered.

Duff and Axl both looked at him and exhaled.

“I’ll talk to her.” Slash huffed walking in between both men to climb the stairs, stumbling on the way.

Axl dashed to the living room, collecting some beers from the fridge, and headed outside to sit on the pool recliners with a clear shot of the sky and the quiet sounds of the night to calm himself down.

… … …

“Maddy is it okay if I come in.” I heard Slash ask , hearing the door slowly creak open.

“Okay.” I murmured not trying to pull myself together as I lay sprawled over my bed, my face buried into the side of my pillow.

"Well, there was a fight and it was pretty interesting besides the fact there was no actual fight since Izzy disappeared somewhere and Axl ran off pissed." he sighed, as if he was waiting for a fight to start so he could pick who to root for.

“Did you want a fight to happen?” I giggled.

Slash was always joking, even in tough situations, which made me appreciate him a lot. He would often distract me from my problems by telling me jokes, which made me laugh.

“Sorry babe, I’m not good at this shit. I can’t even keep a girlfriend myself.” he sighed.

“It’s okay Slash. I appreciate you coming up here to try and make me feel better though.” I smiled.

“Of course. Your like my little sis. I can’t see you upset.” he said jumping on the bed making me squeal.

“Question though?”

“Hm.” I replied.

“I can tell you obviously love them both but who do you think you see a future with out of the two of them?”

“I don’t know I care about them both.”

“That’s true but when it comes down to it, who would you pick?”

“Axl.”

“Holy shit I knew it.”

Conflicted Chapter 22🎀:

Maddy P.O.V

My mother was furious at me to help clean the house since Duff had agreed to come with the band, reluctant at first but then, after hearing his sister's heartbroken attitude, deciding to reconsider not coming.

I chose to wear shorts and a satin baby blue crop top.

“Young lady, what are you wearing!" my mother yelled, putting her fists on her hips and looking me over.

“Mom! It's only Duff and his friends." I whined, wanting Izzy to see me in this clothing.

"Okay, as long as you don't wear that again," she remarked as she prepared the boys' lasagne.

I couldn't stop smiling since I knew Duff would be arriving with them any minute now.

Izzy and I had only been apart for a day, but it felt like forever; even if we didn't leave on good terms, I still missed him a lot.

And Axl.

I never got to thank him for helping me that day.

“YOUR FAVORITE KID IS HOME!" Duff shouted as he opened the door, allowing the knob to hit the wall like he always did, creating an even larger hole in the plaster.

I rolled my eyes at him and walked away, feeling angry again.

My brother was not the evil guy in this situation; I know he did nothing wrong, but I was still furious about how he sent me back without warning and without seeing Izzy.

The band poured into the warm two-story home, breathing a sigh of relief as they protected themselves from Seattle's cold air.

"Hi." I waved and smiled at everyone of them

“Hey Maddy!" Slash and Steven grinned eagerly, the only drink in their system at the moment being coke, a fizzy beverage heavy in sugar, contributing to their hyper behavior.

The boys had agreed to appear sober at the McKagan home so that Maddy's mother would have the best impression of them all.

Especially Izzy.

And there he stood, as tall as ever, with his black coat, slim jeans, and straight black hair.

I waited for him to get to me first, but he quickly moved past me and straight to Duff, who was conversing with my mother.

“Hey.” a voice said, snapping me out of my current haze of conclusion.

“Hi Axl.”

“How are you?.”

"I'm fine. I just wanted to thank you for being there for me that night."

“I'll always be there for you," he said, moving in close enough for me to look up into his eyes.

“Boys I made you all dinner, come eat." My mother yelled, making me jolt from the conversation with Axl, as the boys gathered around the dinner table like starved men, with Duff at one end of the long wooden table and my mother at the other, leaving me in between Izzy and Axl.

Slash and Steven were in front of us, sending me smirks, winks, and obscene gestures implying a threesome, which my mother did not appreciate

"Is there anything I should know?" she questioned the two of them, who dropped their grins and shook their heads no.

“Izzy, was it?…That’s your name young man?”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Okay...., well, my daughter here, tells me that you both love each other.”

“Mom!" I cringed as I felt his stare from the corner of my eyes.

“Yes…uh I do.”

“If you want to be with my daughter then you'll have to get married." she demanded.

The entire table, including Axl, burst out laughing as if it was the best joke they'd ever heard, leaving a sour taste in my mouth.

“Alright, gentlemen. It was a joke; now settle down and enjoy your lasagne.”

“Izzy, based on what I've seen, you appear to be an intelligent man. And the fact that you appear to be making my daughter upset because you aren't here, I'd say I want my daughter out of her pain, and I approve of you being with Maddy." she said, making all the boys except Axl erupt in cheers.

The night went well despite Izzy still ignoring me, and my mother even spent some time with Izzy alone so they could bond before calling it a night, while I felt a little overstimulated and walked upstairs to my room.

Izzy P.O.V

“Your mom loves me." I smirked and slumped into the couch in the living room, where the other boys were also watching cartoons.

“I’m surprised. My mother is generally quite protective of Maddy, but I think she saw something in you she liked." Duff said, glad to have given his best friend another chance after seeing how far he went to impress his little sister.

“Where’s Maddy?” I asked, looking around and seeing no sign of the young girl who I had sat next to, during dinner.

“I think she went upstairs to her room.” the bassist mumbled, yawning as his eyes focused on the cartoon Slash and Steven were watching.

I traveled upstairs searching for Maddy’s room when I spotted a door slightly creaked and light pink walls peeking through.

I was about to knock but fuck it, I just walked in and closed the door behind me locking it.

“Get out.” she grumbled, huddled on her side while hugging one of her stuffed animals.

“Maddy-.”

“You ignored me the whole day.”

“I was just trying to impress your mom.”

“By ignoring me.” she scoffed, feeling her eyes sting of tears.

“Baby I’m sorry.” I cooed, coming up to cuddle her in bed.

“I waited for you the whole day and even dressed up for you to see a-and you didn’t even c-care.” she exhaled shakily, brushing away tears with the back of her hands.

“Fuck Maddy. I’m not good at this shit y’know, this is my first time introducing myself to a girl’s parents.” I sighed sitting up against the headboard of her white and pink bed.

She turned over, with her tear stained cheeks.

“And I’m sorry about the way I treated you at the bar. I know that was fucked up. I care about you so fucking much, I never stop thinking about you.” I told her, holding her chin in my grasp, to raise her head up towards me.

“As long as you’re here that’s all that matters…I guess.” she whispered curling into me.

I caressed her hair till she fell asleep on me, then tucked her into her blanket and turned off the light, letting her lamp illuminate the room.

I ran across Axl as I was leaving her room, who gave me a strange look and asked what I was doing in her room after the argument at the bar.

“You don’t deserve her Izzy. And you know that too.” he told the rhythm guitarist.

“You think your any better.” I scoffed eyeing the arrogant asshole who used to be my best friend once upon a time.

“I know I’m not a good person but I don’t pretend like I am, unlike you.” he spat pushing me on the way to the guest room to which he slammed the door.

“Prick.” I muttered going down the stairs, seeing Duff, Steven and Slash all passed out on the couch.

Great. Where do I sleep.

Slash and Steven had taken up one whole couch and Duff’s height took up one single couch alone, leaving me with the couch chair that was not comfortable in the slightest.

I went back upstairs, contemplating whether I should knock on the guest room door and humiliate myself in front of Axl by begging him to allow me share the guest bedroom or knock on Maddy's door

So I took the better option and went into Maddy's room, closing the door and slipping into bed with her beneath her comforter.

“I-Izzy?" She whispered, half drowsy, as she noticed flashes of black garments in front of her half-closed eyes.

"I’m sleeping with you tonight. Axl is being a bitch." I grunted, slipping off my shirt due to the heat, leaving me shirtless and pantless, since I always slept in my boxers.

“M’kay.” she whispered, cuddling into my body, replacing her stuffed bunny with my body.

“Night.” I said giving her a kiss on the head.

“Mhm…n-nigh-t.” she replied groggily before we both drifted off into a deep sleep underneath her pink soft comforters and the illuminating light of her lamp in the quiet room which would be the complete opposite the next morning.

Conflicted Chapter 21🎀:

Maddy P.O.V:

I didn’t get the chance to say goodbye to anyone because Duff had called our mother and told her everything that happened.

My mother was furious and demanded to see me as soon as possible which is why Duff had already bought my plane ticket for Seattle.

When I first came, I imagined the city to be full of stuck-up people and fashionable drama queens who would look down on you if you were from another city, but I soon grew to enjoy the mountainous city with endless sandy beaches.

I didn’t want to leave.

“It is for your own good. I can't stand seeing you surrounded by drugs and men who can't treat you right." he insisted, driving us to the airport as I gazed out the window, taking in the city for one final time.

I wasn’t even sure if I would be back.

Maybe in a couple of years but for now it was goodbye for good.

We drove by the diner we used to go to with the boys, as well as the rehearsal studio where Axl and I had gotten caught.

And then we walked by the theatre where Izzy had taken me and we happened to have sex for the first time together.

Not how I had imagined sleeping with Izzy for the first time, but I guess it wasn't a huge thing to him because he had sex with women in all kinds of places and it didn't matter to him if we slept in a romantic setting or not.

“I know you probably hate me right now but I’m doing this for your own good.”

“Whatever.” I shakily spat, unable to control the tears that were flowing down my face.

“Maddy he’s no good for you! He’s a drug dealer for christ sake.” he shouted.

“I don’t care. I love him! It’s not fair that I couldn’t even say goodbye to him.” I sobbed, covering my face with my hands and not holding back.

Duff looked at me with shame and felt terrible, but he knew that if I stayed, I'd be dragged into drugs and something even worse, so he put his foot down and sent me back home.

“We’re here.” he muttered, putting the car in park and getting out to grab my things.

I walked out, disregarding my brother, grabbing my belongings from his hands, and followed behind him to avoid him and to get checked in for my flight.

He spoke with a few employees who were fans of their band and had a laugh, with some agreeing to take a picture, which irritated me even more because he appeared as if he didn't care that I was offended by his decision.

“Alright sir, your sister is all checked in and will need to proceed through this corridor to her gate.” the attendant said with a smile.

My brother turned to give me a hug, but I dodged it and huffed past him, stomping as I marched away from him, through the mass of people, while sobbing.

“I love you!” I heard my brother's voice shout, but I was too stubborn to glance back, and when I did, it was too late since Duff had vanished in the the crowd, and I couldn't tell him I loved him as well.

I began crying even more since I loved my brother and knew he was only looking after me, and I became enraged with Izzy for making me angry at my brother, but I eventually got over it, understanding that it was simply my fault for being like a disrespectful brat to my elder brother.

My flight was about to take off, and I had arrived just in time, shortly after crying in the airport bathroom.

I found my seat and sat down, grateful to Duff for choosing a window seat for me, and peered out as the plane slowly began to take off with everyone settled in.

I wondered how everyone else was doing as I took off, and if Axl knew I was going because he was the last one to speak with Duff.

I sighed at the thought of having to deal with my mother when I got home and glanced at the time.

It was 8 a.m., so I decided to nap until the plane landed, which would be in 3 hours and 45 minutes.

… … …

Izzy P.O.V

When I awoke the next morning, I had a terrible headache and had no recollection what the fuck happened the night before or how I ended up in a bed.

It wasn't the comfortable couch I slept on, but Slash's bed in his new home.

The same bed I was in with Maddy when I fucked her at the party.

I rubbed my eyes and gulped a few Tynelols mixed with some leftover whiskey Slash had left on his side table before getting up to wash my face and clean my teeth.

"Finally, you are awake. "I got my bed back." Slash cheered, dashing to his bed, and doing a back flip on it.

I rolled my eyes annoyed at his hyper attitude, still coming down from my headache.

"Dude you know what you did last night, right?" Slash remarked, raising one eyebrow at me.

“What do you mean?”

“You totally scared off Maddy, Axl had to come and save her from your heroin rage.”

“Oh and Duff hates your guts now.” he added at the end.

“I don’t remember any of that.” I murmured.

“You pushed her and she cried, then Duff and Axl came to help her. I would’ve helped her too but I was totally wasted which I regret because you were being a real asshole bro.”

“Where is she right now?” I worried, wondering why I was at Slash's place instead of Duff's.

“Maddy left this morning back home.”

I rushed down the stairs to get his house phone and phoned Duff, hoping he would pick up and that Maddy hadn't left yet, so I could persuade him to alter his mind.

“Yes Slash?” Duff answered.

“Where’s Maddy, can I speak to her please-

“Izzy, she’s gone and you don’t deserve to speak with her after what you did to her. You pushed her on the ground and when she was crying out for you, you ignored her.” he huffed, angry about how his sister was treated by someone he considered one of his best friends.

“Duff, I’m really so-

“Save it Iz. I’m just really disappointed in you.” he sighed, rubbing his forehead.

“Did she hurt herself anywhere? I hope she’s okay…at least you were sober enough to take care of her.”

“Axl and I were.”

“….Axl?…”I grumbled, imagining him rushing to her rescue and making himself the hero in front of her.

"I didn't even say goodbye to her." I mumbled to myself, loathing how she last saw me and how I treated her.

“Sorry man.” was all Duff said before hanging up the phone.

Fuck.

I was mad at myself but I was more mad at Duff for letting her go without getting the chance to say goodbye to her.

I didn’t even know her house number back home and there was no way that Duff would give it to me after what had just occurred between us.

I just hope she didn't forget about me when she returned to Seattle, because I could never forget her, no matter how hard he tried to keep us apart.

I loved that girl.

… … …

Maddy P.O.V

My flight arrived sooner than expected, given how cloudy the city was, a dramatic contrast to the blue skies of the Golden State.

“I hope you enjoyed your journey with United, and we hope to see you all soon. Welcome to Seattle, Washington. Enjoy your visit, and for those returning home, welcome back!" The flight attendant spoke with a cheery grin, opposite my look.

Which was gloomy, like my hometown, not because I was hated home, I love Seattle more than I loved California, but because of the wrath I was about to face from my mother.

My mother was waiting for me outside, so I grabbed my suitcase and proceeded to the exit to find my mother's car.

“Madalaine, is that you!” I heard my mother's angry voice ring in the cold breeze of the city.

“Yes. It's me mom." I murmured, already annoyed by how upset she was with me.

"I don't want to be here any more than you do." She persisted, collecting my belongings and leading me to her car as we both entered.

"We will chat when we go home, young lady. You can nap on the way home," my mother replied quietly, turning on the radio and hearing the booming voice of the local Seattle news station as we drove

I gazed out the windows, gazing at the familiar snow-covered mountains and green trees that loomed over every street, which always seemed taller than the mountains themselves.

“We’re home. Are you awake?” she asked, nudging my shoulder lightly.

I pretended to be asleep so I wouldn't have to deal with my mom later, but she knew better since she called me out and threatened to ground me permanently if I didn't get out of the car, so I jumped out right away.

We got situated in, and I hung all of my clothing in my closet because I knew if I didn't do it now, I wouldn't get around to it later due to laziness.

There was only one piece of clothing left and it was the tiny black dress I had wore that day when Izzy cheated on me with the groupie.

I made a face at it and knew if my mother saw it, she would scream, so I immediately flung it under the bed, hoping she would never have to check there, put my luggage on the shelf in my closet, and climbed into my bed, cuddling my stuffed bunny and watching TV to soothe me.

And when I turned on the television, there was a special screening of Guns N' Roses playing their songs on loop on MTV, which made me want to scream and yank my hair out when I saw Izzy appear on the screen.

He didn't even see me before I left for my trip because of Duff, which reminded me of how I felt on the way home, causing me to cry, and that's when my mother went into my room.

She stood quietly at the entrance, observing my face, as a song played in the background. My mom scoffed at "Paradise City".

“Yeah right! Madeline, don’t you think the girls are prettier in Seattle? My mother joked, attempting to lighten the mood given how distraught her daughter appeared over the alleged superstar her older son had called in about earlier.

“So, tell me, which one is he?" She demanded, sitting at the end of my blanket-covered feet as I watched the television in front of me, anxious for another look at Izzy.

“That one." I whispered as Izzy appeared quickly on the television screen in the music video for Paradise City, wearing red leather pants that contrasted with his white shirt, black vest, and bandana that was wrapped around his head.

"Hm." she paused, gazing at the man her daughter had fallen in love with before shifting her gaze to another who was dressed entirely in white.

“What about him?” she said, peering at the lead singer and winking.

"Mom." I grumbled, embarrassed that I had to have this conversation with her about the same males I had sex with, which my mother was absolutely unaware of, else she would have murdered me.

“I sent you to L.A. because I trusted you to spend time with your brother not so you could go fall in love with some guy who thinks he's a big rockstar."

“Mom you don’t even know him.”

“I know him enough to know that he’s no good for you.”

“How would you-

“I was a young girl like you once.” her mother, reacted to her foolish daughter, who assumed her mother was always this elderly.

“So…who was it?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Elvis…..and no I didn’t sleep with him or date him but I know how it feels to have a crush!” my mom insisted.

“This is different.” I mumbled, curling up into a ball underneath my comforter.

“Honey, I know I was mad earlier but I realized that won’t solve our problem.”

“You have to tell me Maddy. So I can understand your feelings toward….Izzy? Is it?”

“Mom I love him.” I spat it out, feeling the need to get it off my chest, and burst into tears because I realized he wasn't with me and how much I missed him.

“Sweetie don’t cry. It’s okay.” my mom cooed rubbing my back, coming to cuddle with me.

“Are you sure you love him?”

“Y-Yes.” I sobbed, hugging my stuffed bunny tighter, wishing it was Izzy.

“Okay then why don’t I speak to Duff about this and have them all visit?”

“All of them?..” I asked, wondering why she couldn’t just invite Izzy alone.

“Honey I would like to meet all of them so I can see if they are respectful enough to be around my daughter or not." she said.

“That’s alright.” I replied, if it was anything to get Izzy back, I wouldn’t have a problem with agreeing to it.

Conflicted Chapter 20🎀:

Maddy P.O.V :

I stormed out of the bathroom, heading directly for Axl.

He told everyone in the band, which was different than telling his girlfriend something so personal about me.

And Izzy’s ex…that was where I drew the line.

“Axl!" I yelled, watching him pause in the middle of a conversation with their manager and turn his attention to me, lifting an eyebrow at my grumpy attitude.

“You told your girlfriend that you’re in love with me?!?”

"What are you saying Maddy? And keep it down," he clinched his teeth as he led me into a secluded area away from the crowd.

“Angela told me that Erin knows that you're in love with me," supposedly." I scoffed, angered by his casual demeanor, knowing he was the one propagating our private secrets out to the general public.

"I never told Erin anything, Maddy. I swear. I'm not sure why she would say that," he murmured to himself, standing there with his hands on his hips, wondering what he had done to make Erin feel that way.

I stormed away, unaware that Erin was watching us, perplexed, given the fact that they claimed the two were good friends, but based on their recent chat, it seemed as though the two were a couple fighting only adding to her theory.

Which was that her boyfriend was in love with the bassist’s sister.

“Maddy where have you been." Duff asked, already on his fourth drink of the night, banging down on the bar counter for more.

“I've been gone. Not that you would care." I spat, irritated by his intoxicated conduct and the fact that he couldn't even hold a conversation with me, let alone Steven and Slash, and then there was Izzy, wait, there wasn't.

Where was Izzy?

"Hey have any of you seen Izzy?" I inquired with the three boys, who were completely wasted.

"I-z-zzz-y?..why are you t-two goin-g to fuck-k again?" Slash mumbled, smirking wildly at his choice of words,Duff barely noticed until he realized what he had said about his sister and Izzy.

“Shut the fuck up Slash!” the bassist shouted, immediately sobering up.

"Sweetie. Izzy is just over there." Steven pointed to a small area of the pub at a booth where Izzy was sitting with none other than Angela?

The way she giggled and slapped his chest made it seem like the two were having a funny conversation , and he smiled the entire time, not realizing how clear it was that she was flirting with him.

Angela instantly noticed me staring, which prompted Izzy to shift his head, but Angela caught it and kissed him forcefully, prompting him to back off and jump out of the seat.

"Maddy," he murmured to himself, noticing me observing the two and assuming the worst of what I saw.

He instantly raced over to me and explained what had happened, and I nodded, knowing he had done nothing wrong because I was actually standing there seeing Angela be a slut.

"Why does she like you so much? Why doesn't she go see Axl or Slash?" I wondered why she was constantly drawn to Izzy.

"She's been in love with me for a long time and I didn't feel the same way, so we became fuck buddies, but I got bored of her quickly, so I called it out, and she became heartbroken," he explained casually, as if it wasn't his first time leaving a female unhappy as a musician

"Oh." I responded instantly, feeling awful for the girl because I could easily be in the same situation.

It's possible that I'm already there without realizing it.

“I know what your thinking and no just drop it." He sighed, having dealt with enough, and approached his three wasted pals to participate in the fun.

I saw Axl emerge from the scene, an empty arm that no longer served Erin Everly, and he excitedly walked to his bandmates with a sneer on his face.

I had no choice but to join the guys because I had no other friends at all in the big city and I only knew them.

“The brat has joined us.” Axl scoffed, nonchalantly sipping a cool beer in direct contradiction to his drunken bandmates, notably Izzy.

He fell over the counter, almost dropping to the floor, when I caught him and moved him to rest his head on the counter.

“You'll be taking care of him like that for the rest of your life if you keep this relationship going," he whispered, taking little sips from his drink.

“What makes you say that?”

“He’s an addict and he’ll ruin your life too with his drugs.”

"Izzy's not an addict and I can take care of him perfectly fine." I naively defended, smoothing Izzy's hair away from his sweaty face.

“Yeah right.” he scoffed slipping off his stool to found someone to dance with.

"Izzy. Wake up, let's go home." I said to him, feeling his cheeks warm up to my touch and slumped over body.

"N-no just go without m-me." He murmured, fumbling over words and pushed me away with a rough hand.

“Baby, you don’t look so good. I think it’s better if I take you home.”

“Stop touching me!" he yelled, pushing me, causing me to trip on the liquid drink previously spilled on the floor and fall on the hard ground of the bar.

I shrieked, a crushing discomfort running through me and tears forming in my eyes, unable to hide the pain, looking up at Izzy to extend a hand, but he was so high on his drug of choice for the night that he didn't care.

"Maddy! "Are you ok?" I heard Axl call out to me, rushing up to pick me up.

“What happened!" Duff shouted and hurried over to me after seeing Axl kneeling down on the floor.

"I'm fine." I said, tears streaming down my cheeks, as I returned my gaze to Izzy, who was firmly placed on the counter, unconcerned about how he had treated me.

"That bastard. I'll fucking kill you for hurting my baby sister," he roared, grabbing Izzy's shirt and dragging him up to confront his towering frame.

“If you kill me, you'll hurt your sister even more," he replied, grinning at me.

“Fuck you motherfucker.” the bassist growled punching his band mate and knocking him down on his drunken state.

“Duff!” I squealed as I crouched down next to Izzy and his newly slit brow, which was streaming with blood.

"Leave him alone, Maddy. Let's go. Axl said this as he dragged me away from Izzy and picked me up in his arms.

"You just want to fuck her." Izzy mumbled under his breath, amused at Axl's concern for the girl he allegedly dislikes.

The Indiana native may not have heard because he did not intervene, but if he had realized his long-time friend was making such a statement about the sweet girl, he would have knocked him out for good.

“That is it! I've seen enough today. You are not to see Izzy again, and I forbid you from going out with him or any other fucking musician from now on!" Duff yelled, and I could only nod, unable to find the correct words to explain what Izzy had just done.

We all got into Duff's car, Axl and I in the back, as Duff drove us to Axl's apartment.

I felt Axl interlace his fingers with mine, holding my hand in his while I slipped into sleep on his shoulder.

What I didn’t realize was that when I would wake up the next morning, Duff would have my things packed and a flight back to Seattle set out for me.

Conflicted Chapter 19🎀:

Maddy P.O.V

We arrived at a small gig that Guns N’ Roses were set to play, shortly after 8 p.m since they usually always played an hour later than scheduled.

Everyone got their instruments set up as they hopped onto the bar stage tuning their guitars and warming up, to play an acoustic version of “Mr. Brownstone” , “Sweet Child O’ Mine” & many others.

Axl and Izzy were planning on doing a duet for Paradise City but Axl stormed off, leaving Izzy clueless.

“The fuck is your deal.” the Indiana native spat, giving Axl a dirty look as Axl went about his business ignoring him and doing some vocal warmups.

“Baby just ignore him. I think he’s just a bit on edge.” I said rubbing his back.

“I think I’m gonna puke seeing you too.” Axl snarked rolling his eyes at us, moving his chair to the other side of the stage by Slash, taking the microphone with him.

“We need to do a duet and the microphone has to be in the middle of the stage.” Izzy told him, snatching his chair and tugging it back in the middle.

“I don’t need you. My voice is perfect on its own.” he smirked, grabbing the chair and planting it back on the other side of the stage.

"Shut up fuckers, we’re on in 5 minutes." Duff yelled, suffering from a severe headache brought on by yesterday night's partying, which Axl and Izzy intensified.

“Wait! I forgot my drumsticks.” Steven chirped scurrying backstage.

“Great.” Axl retorted, slumping down into his chair.

"Axl!" I heard a girl shout from behind the stage, sitting on a stool, along with other seating configurations on a platform above, with stairs leading down to the stage where the rockers would be performing soon.

She had long curly brown hair, that made her blue eyes pop and a voice that seemed hardly audible even when she shouted.

“Erin baby, you came.” Axl grinned blowing her a kiss.

"Baby?" I wondered, curious about when they got back together and why he would talk to me if he had a girlfriend.

“Jealous?” he smirked, seeing my confused expression which quickly turned sour upon seeing his smug attitude.

“Jealous!” I scoffed, correcting him by saying how disappointed I was.

“Your not my mother…..although if you wanted-

“Okay stop it.” Duff grimaced putting his hands over his ears.

“You guys are not going to treat my sister like one of your groupie whores and take turns with her.”

“Who said we’re taking turns?” Izzy countered, raising an eyebrow at Axl, wondering if anything had happened between the lead singer and the young girl whose heart he had stolen.

“Nothing happened between me and Axl!” Maddy huffed, causing everyone to look at her sudden outburst, stomping her feet as she went up the stairs to sit next to the quiet girl she had observed from earlier.

“Hi. I’m Maddy.” I smiled sweetly, extending a hand out to the bright eyed girl next to me.

“I’m Erin.” she smiled, giving off a soft vibe like she wasn’t a threat and seemed like a sweet girl who didn’t even look like she belonged with the hard rock singer, with her simple outfit.

"Your Duff's…….sister?" She queried, narrowing her eyes at me.

“How did you know.”

“You both have the same mannerisms and are really sweet.” she explained, with the same warm grin.

I returned the smile and got along well with her as the boys performed their songs perfectly, which surprised me given the circumstances from earlier.

One thing I had noticed about Axl and Izzy was that no matter how much they hated each other at times, they made sure to make each other look good while performing, not allowing one person to shine alone but equally sharing the spotlight, which is why they had been friends for so long because they respected and cared for each other deeply.

I hated seeing them fighting and was happy to know that they got along for the show and even hugged it out on stage, not that Izzy was an affectionate guy but Axl was and he made sure to show out for his loved ones.

“You guys were great!” Erin and I squealed rushing down the steps to give each of our guys a hug.

“Thanks Maddy.” Axl cockily grinned, putting his arm around Erin as she ignored the obvious looks he was giving me.

“Come on let’s go.” Izzy muttered, throwing his arm around my waist and placing a kiss on my shoulder, walking me backstage.

“Erin seems like a very sweet girl. I’m glad Axl found someone like her.”

“Yeah. He needs more than her to save himself.”

I didn’t inquire further, nodding, since Axl was a touchy subject.

“I wanna talk about you.”

“What about me?” I giggled, suddenly nervous by the way he was looking at me while he had me pinned between his hands, leaned back against the wall.

I felt my face flush as his hand went to rest on my cheek, running his thumb across my glossed lips, pressing down on the middle of them to form a pout around his thumb and teasing it inside.

“Suck it.” he demanded.

I gradually sucked on his thumb, moving it in and out between my puffed up lips remaining eye contact with him as I pulled off with a pop before spitting on it like he spit in my mouth and letting it drip down, collecting it all before it splattered on the ground beneath us, licking around as I evenly spread the wetness, taking it all the way, bobbing up and down and releasing to kiss his lips with a trail of spit connecting my lips to his thumb.

“Does my baby want my cock that badly that she has to make a mess all over my thumb?” he asked, kissing my lips, engulfing the trail of spit and releasing with a wet smack.

“Yes please. I want your cum. I want it all over my tits and my pussy, an-and all over my body.” I whimpered, as he snaked a hand down my body to aggressively rub my pussy over my panties in fast circles.

“Get on your knees.” he spat yanking on my hair to pull me down, on my ass, letting my legs fold on the ground in a “W” , so I could have my pussy against the ground to rub against.

I grabbed his cock and spit on it letting out a big bubble and blowing on it, creating tiny bubbles and rubbing my lips across it like it was a lip product, back and forth before kissing the tip.

"Take it down your fucking throat." He groaned growing tired of my teasing as he bucked his hips forward pushing my head down, causing me to choke and tear up, forcing him to let go, and let me cough it out before thrusting his cock back down with no remorse, gathering my hair in a messy ponytail to move up and down his hardened length.

I let go of his cock with a sputter, his precum mixed with my spit pouring down onto my tits, as I rubbed it in to give him a show, watching him jerk off in front of my face.

“Such a fucking slut for my cock. You just turn into a little bitch for it.”

“Only for you Izzy. I love being a slut for your big cock.” I replied, giggling as I licked a stripe up his cock while he stroked it over my face.

“Get up I wanna fuck you now.” he grunted pulling me off the floor by my underarms like a rag doll and flipping me around to face the wall, roughly pulling my skirt down, forcing me to stick my ass out for him, while standing on my tippy toes since he was significantly taller than me.

My sneakers squeaked against the ground as he pushed into me from behind wrapping one arm around my waist to keep me firm on his cock while the other pinned my arm up against the wall.

I gasped, arching my back as my pussy became ten times wetter, hearing the lewd noises of his cock entering in and out of my pussy.

“Be fucking quiet.” he growled in my ear.

“You don't want your brother to find us and witness me fucking his baby sister like the desperate little whore she is, would you?”

I loved hearing his perverted comments, enjoying how dirty he made me feel.

“I think you would love it if everybody were to see the cockdrunk slut you are." he spat, causing me to sob.

“I-Iz!” I squealed feeling pleasure waves throughout my body as his cock repeatedly poked against the spongy region of my pussy, making my eyes roll back and incoherently blabbering over and over again about how big his cock was.

“I said be fuck-ing quiet.” he hissed going deeper with his thrusts, moving his hand from my waist to my mouth covering it tightly.

I moved my hand over his, desperately trying to hold onto something as I felt my orgasm approaching and my legs going weak while he pounded into me faster.

“I-I’m gonna cu-cum.” I whined, muffled by his large hand, before he moved it abruptly to rub my clit as I let out a big squeal feeling a gush of liquid release out of me while I tried to stay on my tippy toes with my legs that were now worn out and shaking.

“Shit shit s-shit. Fuck-k yeah baby give it to me. Give me all your fucking cum.”

I squealed pushing Izzy away as I felt very sensitive coming back down from my high.

He pulled himself together while I stayed still trying to catch my breath after squirting.

“That was so hot baby. Did it feel good?” he asked as he buried himself in my neck.

“Y-Yes.” I breathed out, looking down my leg, and seeing his cum spill out.

I reached down my body, whimpering at the feeling of pushing his leaking cum back into my sensitive pussy.

“I would fuck you again but we have to catch up with the guys. Your brother is probably wondering where you went.” he sighed moving his hair out of his face.

I fixed myself and ran my fingers through my hair making sure there were no knots.

“Why don’t you go fix your face in the bathroom while I see what they’re up too?” Izzy suggested, seeing my red stained cheeks and smudged makeup.

“Okay.” I smiled reaching up to give him a kiss as he walked off.

I ventured off into the quiet bathroom fixing my face by running a wet napkin over my smudged mascara and reapplying lipgloss to my swollen lips, when I saw Angela walk in.

The same Angela that used to be Izzy’s favorite groupie.

What was she doing here?

“Hey Maddy!" She grinned, in the fakest voice I'd ever heard.

“Hi.” I responded, meekly.

“You look like you’ve been having fun. Who’s the lucky guy?” she smirked.

“Let me guess. Axl?”

“Axl? No. I’m with Izzy.” I reply, annoyed at her attempt to small talk answers out of me.

She appeared perplexed at first, but then lifted her brow, staring down at her hands as she played with the crusted nail polish.

“So you both are like official now?” she asked, the fake voice suddenly replaced by a bitter tone.

“Yes.” I blushed thinking about earlier while re-applying some fresh coats of mascara.

“Well I think that is very brave of you.”

“What do you mean brave?” I asked.

“Y’know….Izzy’s history with women and all.” she exhaled.

“Izzy is a changed man.” I sighed, annoyed by her false propaganda of trying to deter me away from him.

“I've heard Axl is in love with you." she spat, prompting me to halt in the middle of applying mascara and turn to face her with the wand in hand.

“What told you that?” I hissed, wondering if Axl was going around telling everyone our business.

“Erin Everly, his girlfriend.”

Conflicted: Chapter 18🎀

Maddy P.O.V:

“I don’t think I can. I’ll be leaving for Seattle soon.”

“Wait what? You didn’t tell me.” he wondered, holding the phone tight to his ear.

“Yeah. I kind of decided last minute.”

“But why?”

“Because of Izzy but mainly the fact that I miss home.”

“Are you sure I didn’t have something to do with it. I can’t help but feel like I did.”

“I’m just overwhelmed between this whole situation with you and Izzy.” I sighed, leaning my back against the wall.

“I didn’t mean to upset you but I felt like you should know about my feelings too.” he insisted.

“Axl, what about Izzy?”

“What about him? Isn’t he the same guy who cheated on you.” he snickered, rolling his eyes at the mention of the guy whom he felt used to be his best friend at one point.

“I’m not going to hurt him for you.”

“You already did.” he mentioned, thinking about the time we had slept together.

“I’m never doing that again.” I spat, slamming the phone down.

I sighed running my hands through my hair and went back to my room to find some clothes to wear.

It felt as if my suitcase grew a pair of eyes and burned its gaze right through me, upon entering my closet.

The bag was already open and a few clothes had been placed inside just incase, on an impulse decision I decided that I wanted to start packing.

My closet was a mess ever since I got here since I never had time to clean it because I was also busy with the guys and Duff.

I grabbed the jacket Izzy had left behind, the day he slept over and smelled his cologne, as I folded it up to put in a bag for him.

I still missed him despite the fact that we had a huge argument.

I did not feel the same way after speaking with Axl. It never gave me the butterflies in my tummy that Izzy would give me when he looked at me with those eyes of his.

… … …

“MADDY GET UP. WE’RE GONNA BE LATE.” I heard Duff scream, as I bolted upright in my bed, wondering what the hell was going on.

“You didn’t remember?!?”

“Remember what?” I croaked, rubbing my eyes from the light pouring in from the kitchen, as he held my bedroom door wide open.

“There’s a party at Slash’s. Everyone is invited. So hurry up and change.” he insisted, leaving my door open to grab some last minute items to stuff in his jean pocket.

Like condoms, cigarettes and the keys to his mustang.

I groaned getting up groggily and rushed to the bathroom to quickly freshen up, putting on a natural look with pink lipgloss before heading to my closet to pick out a dress.

Usually in Seattle I would just wear a sundress and call it a day but over here that wouldn’t go right.

Everyone here dressed like they were in Hollywood and so I settled on a slim fitting, silky baby pink dress with spaghetti straps.

And paired it with a silver necklace and matching diamond earrings that Duff had bought for me and my mom.

I grabbed Izzy’s jacket and wore it over my dress and grabbed the white strappy heels to complete my outfit.

“I’m not even gonna argue because you actually look pretty in that.” Duff said giving me a kiss on the forehead, and pushing me out the door.

“Is everyone going to be there.” I asked, indirectly wondering if Izzy was showing up, since he didn’t really enjoy parties as much as I thought.

“Yes Maddy. Izzy will be there too.” he grinned, raising his eyebrows at me.

I rolled my eyes laughing as we hopped into his car and headed to Slash’s new home in Laurel Canyon.

Izzy P.O.V

I sat smoking my cigarette endlessly, with a bottle of Jack as I put a hand through my hair wondering when the fuck this party was going to be over.

The only reason I came here was to congratulate Slash on his new house and the first thing I was met with was a bitchy Axl.

He was giving me strange remarks and looking at me weird even though he was fine a couple of days again.

I didn’t have any energy to entertain his behavior so I placed myself in a quiet area away from all the loud noise, girls and hard drugs.

Even the girls here were getting on my nerves.

They were so sleazy that it was a turn off but I guess that’s how Slash liked his women.

Everyone started cheering as I saw someone’s figure walk-in and bright blonde hair belonging to none other than Duff.

“Finally someone normal.” I huffed looking over where Steven was passed out with a bottle of tequila in his hand.

“Duff. Over here!” I shouted, ushering him over to me with my hand.

“Hey man. Sorry I took so long, Maddy was taking forever to get ready.” he complained rolling his eyes as he grabbed the Jack to take a big swig.

“She came?”

“Yeah. She’s right there.” he pointed, to a shy Maddy who was quietly standing by the counter where they were serving drinks, looking around to find someone familiar.

She looked so beautiful.

She had on this little pink, tight fitting dress, which was covered by my jacket and her pouty lips were covered in sparkly lipgloss, making me want to go over there and kiss her until it smeared all over her face.

“I can see you getting hard over my sister.” he repulsed, looking over to where I was staring at Maddy.

I laughed.

“Just go talk to her please. You guys are dying to make out with each other I can tell.” he remarked grabbing some shots from a passing tray and heading over to the herd of models that were perched on Slash’s lap.

“Hey Maddy.”

“Hi.” she spoke, her voice barely above a whisper.

“You look really pretty…I see you wore my jacket.” I smirked, placing my hand on her waist to pull her into me.

Her lips pursed and sparkling eyes glowed as she turned to face me, making me speechless as I stared at her beautiful face.

“You wanna go up to Slash’s room?” I asked, caressing her cheek with my hand.

"O-Okay," she said, allowing me to take her hand in mine as I led us both up the stairs, the noisy talk of everyone in the party becoming quieter and quieter until we found ourselves alone in Slash's room.

I removed my jacket from her, locking the door behind us and pressed her against it as I assaulted her neck with wet kisses, groping all parts of her body, enjoying how she reacted to each touch.

“M’sorry that I was mean to you even after you apologized.” She whispered to me, her eyes huge and brows raised, as she pouted her lips.

"I promise to never hurt you again." I whispered, kissing her all over her face and chubby cheeks as she giggled.

“You look so sexy in this dress but I would love to see how you look without it.”

“I want that too.” she coyly smirked.

I took her and laid her on the bed, sliding her dress straps down to display her breasts, alternating between sucking them sloppily and tenderly massaging them with my thumb flicking up and down her nipples.

“I love it when you kiss my breasts.” she whimpered running her hand through my hair, softly tugging at the ends.

I moved down her body, dragging the rest of her dress along and dumping it on the ground, grabbing one of her legs to perch on my shoulder as I spit on her pussy, pressing it in to make her wetter, inserting my finger in and instantly feeling her clench around it.

“Mmphh.” she moaned pushing herself forward to sink my finger in her pretty pink pussy to the hilt.

“Your so dirty y’know that. Letting your brother’s best friend touch you like this.” I grunted grinding into the bed, feeling turned on by her little whimpers and moans.

“I like being your dirty girl Izzy.” she moaned grabbing her breasts with her hands to push them together for me.

“Fuck.” I groaned taking off my shirt and pants throwing them somewhere across the room and getting completely naked along with her.

“I’m gonna fuck you so hard and you’re gonna sit there like a good girl and take it. M’kay?” I cooed, gripping the back of her hair and tilting her head back, asking her to open up so I could spit in her mouth.

She stared up at me through her lashes, extending her tongue out as I dropped a glob of spit directly onto her tongue, watching her swirl it in her mouth before swallowing it and sticking her tongue back out to show me.

"Holy Fuck. You're so fucking sexy, baby. Where did you learn that from?" I asked, slapping my dick on her pussy a few times, hearing the slick sound of her juices coating my dick.

“Some girls in school.” she whispered looking at me with those innocent eyes.

"No one else can see you like this. You’re all fucking mine." I spat, gripping her waist and forcing her down onto my hardened cock.

“Y-Yes yes. M’ all yours daddy.” she whined, as her body bounced each time I slammed her up and down my cock.

I groaned hearing her call me daddy and fucked her harder, as my grip on her waist tightened definitely bound to leave marks, hearing the sound of skin slapping each time I bottomed out into her.

“I-Iz-zy c-cum in me p-please.” She pleaded with me, making grabby hands, to kiss my lips as I felt her orgasm approaching.

“F-fuuckk. Oh fuck look at that fucking pussy milking my cock.” I grunted watching her pussy suck every last drop of my cum into her.

I stroked her stomach thinking about what it would be like to have a mini Izzy but quickly forgot after I came down from my orgasm and rolled over catching my breath as I lied next to her with her flushed out face and fluttery eyes.

“I love you so much Izzy. Please never hurt me.” she mumbled as she fell asleep.

I promise I won’t.

Conflicted : Ch 17🎀

Maddy P.O.V

I woke up the next morning with Izzy draped over me, snoring loudly right by my ear, causing me to push him over.

Last night he had come to apologize but I felt as if he was forced to do it just because Axl told him so.

Nonetheless I accepted it because, an apology is an apology.

He looked so adorable sleeping that it almost made me forget that I was still pissed at him for letting a groupie suck him off.

I huffed and got out of bed not caring about the fact that Izzy could wake up and hopped in the shower to get ready for the day.

Hopefully he woke up by the time I was out so I could see the look on his face when I ignored him.

It was slightly amusing seeing the way he tried hard to get my attention but then again it was for a good cause and that was, to teach him a lesson.

Although I wasn’t so sure if I could avoid him after last nights cuddling.

I woke up in the middle of the night, feeling something hard poking my butt.

I guess he couldn’t control himself even in his sleep.

… … …

Duff was awake when I came into the kitchen for some breakfast, watching MTV which was currently featuring their new song, “Welcome to the Jungle”.

“Look it’s us!”

“Someone tell mom.” Duff exclaimed clapping with joy as he watched him and his band mates on national television.

“Um I don’t think so.” I scoffed, imaging how horribly wrong that would go if my mother ever got around to watching one of their music videos.

Which was filled with endless amounts of bad language, drugs and sexual innuendos.

“So I’m assuming Iz spent the night with you.” my brother asked seeing the black boots left by the front door.

“Yeah. He apologized.”

“And what did you say?”

“I accepted it but I told him we aren’t getting back together.” I sighed slamming the milk carton on the counter.

“He’s a great guy. Cut him some slack Mads.”

“What slack? Duff, he cheated on me with some trashy groupie!” I whined putting my hands over my eyes to prevent myself from crying.

If I had cried any more, my eyes would probably swell up and explode.

“Ahem.” Izzy coughed from my bedroom door.

I rolled my eyes upon seeing him, feeling angry as I made my way to the couch to sit next to Duff.

“Morning Iz. Want some cereal?” Duff mumbled through a mouth full of Fruit Island cereal.

“Nah I’m good. I’ll have some coffee though.” he muttered pulling out a cigarette.

“Maddy go make him a cup of coffee.” my brother insisted, too busy entranced by the models on the screen that were interviewing some rock band by the name of Motley Crue.

“Urgh. Fine.” I spat making my way to the kitchen and taking out some coffee I had just made.

“Y’know this is what it would be like if we were married.” Izzy smirked sitting down at the counter to watch me make his coffee.

“What? Being your slave…no thanks.” I scoffed turning around to grab some sugar.

“Quit it with the attitude. I said I was sorry already.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.” I huffed, roughly sliding the coffee to him, causing it to splash.

He looked at me enraged, wanting to tell me off but keeping his mouth shut because of Duff.

“Fucking brat.” he muttered grabbing the cup and leaving to sit by Duff.

He could be so mean sometimes.

But then he could be sweet, caring and charming which was the Izzy I fell in love with.

Not the Izzy that cheated on me and had bipolar mood swings.

I went back to the table they were sitting at to grab my cereal so I could retreat to my room but Izzy yanked me by the arm, pulling me into his lap.

“Ew. I’m out of here.” Duff revolted grabbing his magazine and leaving to his room.

“Why are you being so mean to me?” he asked twirling a piece of my hair in his finger.

“You’re the one being mean.” I exhaled playing with my hands in my lap.

He turned me around to face him and cupped both of my cheeks in his hands.

“I’m sorry for being such an asshole.” he said, kissing me in between every word.

“Just promise me that you won’t cheat on me again please?” I asked, blindly ignoring the cut he had left on my heart and accepting it for what it was.

“I won’t baby.” he promised.

“I missed kissing you.” he whispered, stroking my arm lightly.

“I-…I wanted to ask you something.”

He looked kind of offended that I dodged his kiss but nodded for me to continue on with my question.

“Do you think Axl loves me?” I shakily asked, not knowing if he was going to get mad at me or not.

The truth was, I was curious why Axl was being so caring and nice towards me recently.

And when Izzy told me last night that he almost beat him up over me, I definitely raised a few eyebrows over that.

“Why?” he sternly asked, his jaw tightening with anger.

“Because he almost killed you over what you did to me last night…remember?”

He scoffed pushing me back a bit on his lap but not all the way.

“Even if Axl loved you it wouldn’t be enough.”

“He has too much baggage from his past to maintain any relationship and will cheat on you as many times as he will tell you he loves you.” Izzy snorted laughing sarcastically about his dig towards Axl.

“I might leave sooner than expected to Seattle.” I interrupted.

“What why?”

“I haven’t really had the best time here. And I’m feeling homesick.” I replied, partly telling the truth and lying about the rest.

The whole truth was, that he ruined my desire to stay here any longer and I wanted to get away from Izzy, Axl and L.A. for awhile.

“You can’t just leave. What about us!” he snapped, his brows furrowed.

“I have school and other stuff…”

“So what….y-your just gonna leave me after I fuck up once and that’s it. No second chance?” he urged looking at me with his big hazel-green eyes that I loved.

I couldn’t come up with one correct answer so I kissed him, not knowing how else to cope with the fact that I might never see him again and put both of my arms around his neck.

“Fuck me Izzy.”

“What? Maddy-

“Make me forget about that girl please. Fuck me.” I begged, hoping it would help resolve some of the anger I was still habouring about him cheating.

And somehow convince myself that after this everything was going to be okay.

It didn’t take much to get me wet for Izzy, all he had to do was talk dirty to me and I was a mess down there.

“Take off your panties, quick.” he urged, pulling his cock out which was already leaking.

I took off my panties and let my nightgown fall back down to cover the fact that I wasn’t wearing anything down there and lowered myself onto his hardened cock, slowly.

“Ohh-“ I squealed feeling it stretch me out in a way I never had been before.

“Ride me.” he demanded letting his arms fall to my thighs, pressing small circles onto the warm skin.

“I don’t know how Iz…” I mumbled, embarrassed that we had to stop because of this.

“This Maddy.” he emphasized, grabbing my waist, which perfectly fit into his hands and grinding me down onto his cock before letting my pussy off his cock and slamming it back down with a squelch.

“O-Ow!”

“Just keep doing it until it feels good.”

I moved up and down slowly at first before releasing his cock all the way and then shoving myself back down the way he taught me, feeling my little nub touch the stray hairs at the base of his cock.

“T-That feels g-good.” I moaned,letting my eyes roll back as he took over, pounding up into me relentlessly.

“Yeah?” he coaxed, pushing my hair out of my face to stroke my cheek as he gripped onto my waist with the other hand.

I reached back down to grab the end of my nightdress pulling it up above my breasts, letting them bounce freely to put on a show for him.

He looked up at me while he took one in his hand and massaged them roughly, spitting on them and rubbing it in on my nipples.

“I want a kiss.” I whined grabbing his hand and interlacing our fingers.

“C’mere.” he cooed grabbing the back of my neck to push me onto his awaiting lips.

We were making out sloppily not worrying about hiding our moans, making me about to orgasm quicker with how roughly he was kissing me.

It turned me on whenever he grabbed me by my neck and took control but my euphoria didn’t last very long because right when I felt like I was about to cum I heard someone yell really loud.

Almost like a girl.

“OHH MY GODD.”

“BLEACH. SOMEONE GIVE ME A GALLON OF BLEACH NOW.” Duff screamed covering his eyes as he made a disgusted face at his sister who was practically naked, straddling her boyfriend/his best friend who was also half naked.

Izzy laughed upon seeing Duff’s expression remaining calm and in no hurry to cover up but I immediately jumped off him rushing to grab my panties and ran to my room.

“I’m going to tell mom! I cannot believe I had to see this.” Duff whined stomping his foot like a big baby as he grabbed a pillow and threw it out Izzy who didn’t seem to give any shit about being caught.

“And you!” he said pointing a finger at Izzy.

“You owe me for having to witness this shit. I want to barf right now.” he groaned kicking the couch with his feet to which Izzy thought was hilarious.

“I’m going for a run now. I need it.” Duff yelled slamming the door shut.

Izzy came into my room shortly after and pulled me up to straddle his waist.

“No Izzy I’m not in the mood anymore.” I whispered, avoiding his face.

“Okay fair enough. But were you serious about going back so soon?” he asked burying his face in the nook of my neck.

“Yes. I need to get away from you and from this place.” I sighed tugging at his arms to let me down.

He let me down onto the bed and ran a hand through his hair, staring at me baffled.

“So you’re just gonna leave us behind? I made one mistake for fucks sake!” he grunted pulling out his favorite anxiety medication, a pack of cigarettes.

“That doesn’t matter, why did you let that groupie give you a blow!” I shouted scrunching my face in anger.

“She doesn’t mean anything to me. It was just a blowjob and not even a good one.” he scoffed, blowing out the smoke.

“How would you feel if I got on my knees for Axl!” I retorted hoping he understood how I was feeling right now.

“I’d fucking kill him.”

“Exactly.”

“No. This is different because I barely knew the girl. Holy shit.” he huffed getting frustrated with my constant bickering.

“Get out.”

“Fine. Fuck this. I don’t need you when I have multiple girls who line up for us after every show.” he shouted on his way out.

I heard the door slam and buried myself into my bed, letting out a deep exhale as I looked out the window, wondering if I should leave sooner than later.

Just when I was about to grab my suitcase I got a call and got up to answer it.

“Duff’s not home-

“Maddy. I wanted to talk to you actually.” a deep voice spoke from the other side of the phone.

“Axl?”

“Yeah. Listen I know Izzy loves you and you love him but I have to tell you this to get it off my chest.”

“What is it?…”

“I think I’m in love with you and I was wondering if you would be willing to give us a chance?”

This had to be a dream….

Conflicted Pt:16🎀

Izzy P.O.V

Things were great between Axl and I. We had been talking again like old times and I had been staying with him,since Duff wouldn’t answer my calls.

I tried to call Maddy as well but I got no answer and it went to voicemail everytime.

Axl told me to give her some space and that she would come around but she never ignored me this much and I was started to feel uneasy about our relationship going forward.

“I think I’m going to go over there.” I told Axl, feeling confident enough to show my face to Maddy in an effort to save our relationship.

“Are you sure?”

“I don’t know how she’ll feel about seeing your face right now especially Duff. Y’know how overprotective he is when it comes to Maddy.” Axl snorted remembering the time that Duff almost knocked him out for misinterpreting the day he took Maddy out for a hookup.

“It doesn’t matter what Duff thinks. Maddy can think for herself, screw him for not answering my calls.” I spit, getting up from the couch to grab my jacket and keys.

“Just be careful of what you say to her. She’s probably overly sensitive right now.” Axl told me before I left out the door and to Duff’s place.

… … …

I knocked on the door for what felt like forever when the door suddenly opened to a stern faced Duff.

“Iz you need to leave now.” he spat not giving me a chance to reply as he started to shut the door on me, which I stopped with my foot.

“Duff please let me explain. I really love your sister and I fucked up but I can’t fucking live without her.” I begged, which was weird since I never thought I would have to beg Duff for anything.

“I knew you would pull some shit like this. I even warned her.” he lashed out,pointing an accusatory finger at my face.

“It’s not my fault! Axl was the one who tried seducing her and I found them both together at the Troubadour.” I spewed not thinking twice about the consequences it would have on Axl.

All I was thinking about was saving myself and looking good in front of him to get through to Maddy.

“What do you mean Axl and Maddy were together?” he asked this time directing his anger towards Axl instead of me.

“I saw them both, they were like leaning into each other or some shit.” I muttered, all of a sudden remembering why I was mad at Maddy at the first place.

“Y’know what, I shouldn’t have come. I’m sorry for bothering you.” I sighed feeling that aching pain I felt when I caught Axl and Maddy together that day.

“Wait. I know she would want to see you, after all she was crying for you last night anyways.” Duff sighed putting his hand on my shoulder to give it a tight squeeze.

“And I know you didn’t mean to hurt her. I guess sometimes I forget that we are rockstars and having a relationship can be pretty tough a lot of the times.” he added,letting out a deep breath as he suddenly remembered about Axl.

“So wants the deal with Ax. Does he have feelings for her?”

“Yeah. But don’t tell him I said anything. He gave me shit for how I treated Maddy last night and seemed genuinely hurt that she was upset. I wouldn’t take him as a threat.” I told Duff to let him know not to attack Axl just because of some things I might have let slip out.

“Yeah I guess you’re right. The poor guy hasn’t been very lucky with Erin recently either so I guess he’s just trying to find his place again.”

“Well anyways. Maddy’s in her room. I’ll give you both some privacy.” he said as he walked off to his room closing the door shut.

I suddenly felt these weird butterflies in my stomach.

Something I hadn’t felt since middle school.

Usually I never had butterflies because all I did were one night stands,hookups or quick blowjobs after our shows with endless groupies lined up to our pleasure.

It never once occurred to me that I would be nervous for a girl, ever in my life until now.

That feeling was for Maddy.

I twisted the knob slowly and opened the door finding her chest moving up and down softly, she wasn’t snoring but she was asleep for sure.

As I came closer I saw her sprawled across her bed, her comforter bunched up around her feet and her pink babydoll nightdress was bunched around her waist while she cuddled a stuffed bunny.

I came and sat next to her on the bed stroking her hair softly,away from her face as I watched her small body moving up and down with every breath she took, stirring a bit in her sleep when she felt my hand.

She reached up to grab it to which I assumed she thought was Duff because when she opened her eyes and saw me she immediately sat up almost banging her head on her bed frame.

“What are you doing in my bed?” she softly whispered, tugging her nightdress down from her waist to cover herself.

“I’m sorry.”

She looked up at me when I said that and I caught her eyes sparkling as her fairy lights shined down in the room, dimly lighting our figures amongst the darkness of the night.

I could see how puffy her eyes were and it hurt me to know that I was the cause of that.

I reached out to stoke her cheek but she swiftly moved away rejecting my touch.

“When I saw you and Axl together, I saw the way you both looked at each other. You lost your virginity to him so it makes sense that you feel different with him than me.”

“He really cares about you for some odd reason. I guess ever since you slept with him he’s had this soft spot for you in his heart.”

She was silently listening, not replying but instead analyzing everything I said, in her head, by herself.

“And I kissed that girl to make you jealous, when I came back to the dressing room Axl almost killed me because he said that you left crying.”

I saw her twitch when I mentioned Axl and how he almost tried to kill me.

“Which made me realize he might love you and that scares me because you’re supposed to be mine and the thought of him taking you away from me is something I’m not ready to accept.”

She still wasn’t saying anything which was getting on my nerves since I came here and tried to explain to her why I made a mistake.

“Are you just gonna sit there and not say anything Maddy?” I spat getting uncomfortable with the silence she had going on.

“I accept your apology Izzy. But I don’t want to get back together with you.” she croaked turning around to lie down, nestled, with her stuffed bunny.

I could hear her silent sniffles and didn’t want to bother her anymore, so I didn’t have to hear her crying.

Not because it was annoying, but because hearing her cry was the worst, knowing I caused it.

It made me feel bad for her.

“Maddy come on. I don’t want you to cry anymore. I love you, y’know that right?” I whispered laying down to pull her close to my body, putting an arm around her waist.

She didn’t move away from my touch but kept her head down in the stuffed bunny she was cuddling.

Her sniffles eventually slowed as she stopped crying and fell asleep with calm breaths.

I moved her hair out of her face and wiped off the tears that stained it, giving her soft plushy cheek some kisses before taking off my jacket and tucking us both into her blanket.

A rockstar couldn’t possibly fall in love, unless the right girl came along.

Conflicted Pt:15🎀

Maddy P.O.V :

I didn’t bother Izzy any more than I already had that night.

Despite what occurred between Axl and Izzy they both did an exceptionally well job on stage and even shared the mic quite often to sing a number of songs together.

It seemed like when it came down to being a band,they were really close and it showed in their amazing performances.

It bothered me that I was driving a wedge between them both because I knew they had a long history, since they had known each other from Indiana.

Izzy told me all about Axl’s troubled childhood and how he felt bad for him, and would be there for him as much as he could despite Axl’s erratic behavior.

I felt as though I was messing around with their feelings too much and most importantly,wanted to make things right between Izzy and I.

But first I wanted to talk to Axl about everything that had transpired between us.

… … …

“You guys were awesome!” I squealed running up to my brother to congratulate him.

“Thanks sis. I appreciate it.” he said giving me a kiss on the cheek.

“Ew Duff. You’re all sweaty.” I scoffed wiping my cheek with the back of my hand.

“Where’s my kiss Duff?” Slash grinned moving his sunglasses down to peek at him.

“You’re definitely wasted.” Duff groaned heading back to the dressing rooms with Slash and Axl.

“How did you like the drums Maddy!” a rather hyper Steven asked, practically bouncing towards me with the adrenaline running though his system.

“It was great Stevie. I loved it all.” I nodded, to which he gave me his iconic grin before heading off in the same direction the others went.

I saw Izzy standing near the stage talking to some girls who were giggling and asking for his autograph.

So I made my way over there to introduce myself and let the girls back off or maybe make new friends.

“Hi everyone!” I grinned waving at the girls who didn’t seem to be any older than my age.

They looked at each other and then back towards me with an unpleasant look on their faces, practically sour.

“Who are you?” one of them spat chewing some mint gum furiously as she looked me up and down, judging my black dress.

They were wearing black ripped jeans with crop tops accessorized with chunky heels and paired with silver hoops and a bold red lip.

“I’m actually Duff’s little sister.” I replied with a warm smile in contrast to their nasty behavior.

“So you aren’t his girlfriend?” the same bratty girl asked now smirking at Izzy who was ogling her.

“N-No I mean y-yes I am.” I spewed feeling my cheeks get hot as soon as it came out of my mouth.

I didn’t dare turn around to face Izzy knowing well that he wouldn’t be feeling the same way.

“When were you gonna tell me you had a girlfriend Iz!” the girl whined like she had been waiting to spend the rest of the evening with him and her plans just got ruined.

“I never said I did.” he shrugged putting his hands up in the air before reaching down in his pocket to light up a cigarette, blowing the smoke towards my way deliberately.

I was caught off guard by the big cloud of smoke he released that I let out a few coughs causing the girls to laugh at me.

“Fucking virgin.” some girl snorted from behind the main girl.

Izzy laughed behind me like it was some funny joke.

“What’s so funny?” I asked abruptly turning around to face him.

I could feel how hot my face was from just turning around and trying to defend myself from Izzy.

“She’s kind of right. You are a virgin in a lot of ways maybe not sexually.” he snorted causing the girl who was vowing for his attention to burst out laughing.

I felt the sting of hot tears about to spill down my face and felt my breath increasing, trying my hardest not to let him see me cry.

“Aw are you gonna cry Maddy. Who fucking gives a shit.” he spat rolling his eyes at me and gesturing towards the girl to come to him.

She giggled and trotted over to where he was and right when I was just about to walk away, Izzy caught my wrist in a tight grip.

He looked me right in the eyes while giving the girl in front of him a big sloppy open mouthed tongue kiss.

“Izzy!” I screamed pushing the girl away from him to slap him across the face but he caught my hand and looked at me very aggressively with this fire in his eyes.

“Don’t fucking come near me.” he shouted making me flinch before he grabbed the girl’s hand again and disappeared down the hallway with her.

I ran off to the first room I could find in the empty backstage area and locked myself in there, bawling my eyes out as I sunk to the floor burying my face in my knees.

I understand that he was mad at Axl and I but I didn’t even let Axl kiss me.

I quickly adopted a raging headache from my tearful breakdown forcing myself to get up from the ground and wipe off my tears.

The dressing room was only a few doors down and I had to tell Duff I wanted to get out of here as soon as possible and without Izzy.

But when I went to open the door of which I thought would be the dressing room the girl from earlier opened it, in a now disheveled state, her hair was knotted and her mascara ran down her face as she wiped the corner of her mouth attempting to fix the smeared lipstick.

I looked over at Izzy who was pulling his pants up, attempting to find his belt in the mess of supplies that was in the janitor’s closet.

He saw me and didn’t say a word much to my dismay as I slammed the door shut not caring if I slammed it on the girl’s hand, wishing I had and broken her finger for being such a whore.

And felt the tears starting to pour dramatically again, this time without any control in the near future as my eyes got puffier by the minute, swollen by how much I had cried already.

I found the GNR manager leaving a room to which I assumed was it and ran towards it not caring who saw me in such a state because it couldn’t be worse than what I had just witnessed.

“Duff I w-wanna g-go NOW.” I wailed, embarrassingly loud for everyone in the dressing room to go silent and stare at me in shock.

“Maddy stop your scaring me. What happened?!?” Duff exclaimed rushing over to me with his brows furrowed.

“Iz-zy…I can’t I wa-na go now please.” I hiccuped, a mess with my tear stained face and throbbing head causing me more pain.

“Okay okay let’s go.” my brother said grabbing my hand and leading me towards the exit with our belongings.

I couldn’t see anything through my blurred vision as I hoped into the vehicle that would wait for Gun N Roses after every show, well now it was mine for the night as Duff and I drove back to his place safe and soundly.

I hugged my brother as I drifted off to sleep in his arms wishing nothing more than this to be a bad dream and that when I woke up, everything was back to normal.

Izzy P.O.V

“Can you fuck me now?” the girl asked looking at me with seductive eyes, or I guess that’s what she thought.

I didn’t even remember the girls name.

“No. I have a girlfriend.” I told her before I found my belt and made my way towards the door to get the fuck away from her before she asked for anything else.

“B—But I thought-

I let the door slam in her face not giving a damn what else she had to say, fishing in my pocket for another cigarette.

Maddy had given me some major fucking anxiety a few minutes ago when she caught the girl giving me a blowjob.

The only thing that was gonna help me right now was some fucking nicotine,booze and heroin.

I needed to get fucked up tonight to forget about all of this and her, for good.

I wasn’t the ideal guy for her and she was too much of a good girl for me to the point where I questioned my own morality sometimes.

She was better off with someone like Axl.

I sighed and opened the door of the dressing room when all of a sudden Axl pushed me up against the wall roughly and held me to it.

“The fuck did you do Stradlin.” he barked holding me tighter to which I pushed him harshly causing him to stumble.

“What are you talking about.”

“She left here fucking hysterical because of something you did. She wouldn’t even tell us because she was too busy sobbing.” he said putting his hands on his hips as Slash and Steven both shot me disapproving looks.

“I didn’t do shit! You guys are the ones who would’ve fucked if it wasn’t for me going to check on Maddy when she was trying to find the restrooms!” I shouted frowning st Axl.

“Dude! She’s fucking in love with you. She literally pushed me off and told me she loves you.” he sighed sitting down with a smack to his forehead with his palm.

“Okay well how was I supposed to know Axl!” I grumbled looking at him as more than a band mate but as a good friend for the first time in awhile.

It seemed like he genuinely wanted to help me out here.

“Look I’m sorry for going after her. I know how much you care about Maddy. And so now that you have her I need you to go and fucking find her and fix things. Make it right.”

“You’re right Ax. I gotta find her.” I spewed rushing to grab my things and jogging outside to one of our loading vans.

I hope it wasn’t too late….I just wished she knew how much she really meant to me.

She was the best thing to ever happen to me in awhile and I didn’t want to give her up.

Not for fucking anything.

Conflicted Pt: 14 🎀

Izzy P.O.V

Our band received the best selling album label by the time our tour had ended, but our manager scheduled us to perform a gig at the Troubadour for old times sake.

We agreed to it, of course, it was nostalgic for us too, to see how far we had come since the last time we were at the Troubadour.

I was also excited for Maddy to come and see us perform since she’d never seen me play live.

“Izzy do you think your groupies will show up tonight.” she scoffed looking through her pile of clothes, scattered everywhere in the closet.

“Can’t say they won’t but I don’t care about them when I have you.” I cooed pulling her in from behind, so her body was pressed against mine.

She looked into the standing mirror that was in her closet and sighed.

“I wish you would hug me like this in front of them to show them your mine.”

“Baby-

“I know I know, it would ruin your playboy imagine.” she muttered pulling away to bend down at the black dress that was peeking out of the pile.

“You are not wearing that.” I laughed grabbing the flimsy material and throwing it at the top of her shelf.

“I am! If you don’t want us to be seen together then I don’t have to dress like I’m in a relationship.” Maddy retorted fisting her hands at her sides and stomping her foot down.

“I’m not letting you around the guys with this dress.” I told her imagining what would happen if she wore the tiny fabric.

I know Axl would love it.

“You’re not the boss of me.” she said attempting to grab at the shelf with her 5’6 frame.

“If you can grab it. You can wear it…I guess.” I replied rolling my eyes at her persistence to wear the tiny piece of clothing.

Did she have any idea what Axl would do if he saw her in the dress?

All of his self control would go out the door and into Maddy’s panties.

… … …

We all arrived an hour late to the gig since Duff got into an argument with Maddy over the tiny black dress and threatened her to change but Maddy didn’t budge so they went at it for another 20 minutes.

I intervened and told Maddy to just wear my jean jacket over it to which Duff agreed and said was a great solution.

“Maddy I better not see you without that jacket at the venue. I’m just trying to protect you from the guys y’know.” Duff sighed, looking at his younger sister who was currently ignoring him at the moment.

“It’s okay man. I’ll look at her.” I said giving Duff a reassuring nod before we all hopped into his car and made our way to the venue.

Slash,Axl and Steven all came together since they lived closer than Duff.

And obviously I didn’t have a place at the moment so I technically lived with Duff.

“I’m so excited to play this gig!” Steven exclaimed twisting his drumsticks in between his fingers and kicking his feet at the table which was provided in the backstage room.

“Same.” Slash replied chugging down the bottle of Jack Daniel while taking a few drags of his cigarette.

I couldn’t tell where he was looking since his shades were completely covering his eyes and his hat hid most of his upper forehead, hiding any expressions.

But I could see him smiling and giggling to Axl about something, and Axl was looking directly towards Maddy.

“Is something the matter guys?” I asked, my tone visibly bitter as I give Axl a stern look.

Axl then turned towards me with the opposite expression of which he displayed just a few seconds ago and raised his eyebrows a bit.

“Why?” he rudely asked smoking his cigarette and blowing the smoke in my face.

“Fuck off with that shit.” I told him, mostly annoyed by the smoke in my face but also wanting him to back off from Maddy who was completely clueless in what was going on.

“You’re not her daddy Izzy. She can do as she pleases.” Axl smirked getting up from the couch to give some stray groupies autographs.

Maddy sat at the floor since we all took up the couch, I had insisted for her to sit on my lap but she said she was more comfortable on the floor at my knees, I didn’t mind since I got to play with her hair while we did interviews.

Which was a big stress reliever.

I loved having her around during press interviews since I hated fucking speaking to them because all they wanted to know was bullshit personal questions instead of the real discussion, which was music.

“Iz. I have to pee.” Maddy whispered getting up slowly so her dress didn’t ride up.

I was still kind of mad at her for wearing the dress but when she stood up the dress straightened out enough for the jean jacket to cover her ass.

“Will you be okay alone baby?” I asked, since she hadn’t been to the Troubadour before, I wanted to make sure she was comfortable because there were always creeps at some of our shows who preyed on the girls that would come.

She softly declined and gave me a peck on the cheek as I snuck in a quick ass grab when she was bended over to which Duff gave me a sour look.

“Sorry man. Your sis is hot.” I shrugged lighting up a cigarette.

“Gross dude! Just do that shit when I’m not around.” Duff frowned.

“BOYS! WE ARE ON IN 10 MINUTES!” our manager yelled repeatedly slapping his wrist with his pointer finger.

“Can you yell any louder.” Slash mumbled slumping down into the couch with his bottle of Jack Daniel’s which was now empty.

“You didn’t save any for me. Fuck you man!” I whined grabbing the empty bottle and throwing it at the floor.

Slash and Steven burst out laughing while our manager came to calm their drunk asses down.

… … …

Maddy P.O.V

I swerved through the crowd of people who were starting to gather in clusters backstage.

And weaved my way out, desperately trying to locate the women’s room when I ran into Axl with his arm around some random girl.

“Maddy?” he called out,looking at me rather confused.

“I- I’m looking for the bathroom. Have you seen it?” I asked looking both at him and the girl.

“Yeah. I’ll show you.” he replied shrugging off the girl and walking me towards the restrooms.

“Who was that?” I asked looking at him with curious eyes.

I always heard stories about the groupies and how they played with different bands but it was pretty surreal to see it happen in real life.

“Just some girl who likes our music.” he smirked stopping right besides the door to the women’s room.

He walked me into the back of the wall and put his arm up to lean in front of my body.

“I’d like this dress much better without Izzy’s jacket.” he whispered tugging the jean jacket off one shoulder, leaving my right collarbone exposed.

I was wearing an off the shoulder black dress that stopped right below my ass.

It wasn’t something I would ever wear but I found it when I was cleaning and I figured it was left behind by some groupie so I washed it and wore it to look grown up since all the dresses I brought from home were frilly and floral.

And the girls here dressed so different so when I saw the dress it immediately screamed L.A.

“What if I took it off.” he said, not giving me a chance to think, swiftly pulling the jacket off and onto the floor exposing my figure.

“You look so good. Better than all of the girls here.” he gently murmured placing his pointer finger under my chin to direct my gaze on his eyes instead of his feet.

“Stop it Axl. I’m with Izzy.” I mumbled breathing with how close he was to me.

It was almost uncomfortable knowing he could see all of me, since my jacket wasn’t covering me anymore.

He reached for my thigh and started tracing small circles on it, inching closer towards the end of my dress, tugging it up lightly until he exposed half of my panties which were black to match my dress.

“W-wait stop. I can’t I love-

“Izzy. Yeah I get it.” he huffed letting go of me.

“Maddy?”

“Izzy?” I squinted wondering if it was really him or if I was hallucinating.

“I go to look for you to make sure you’re safe and I find you with him.And my jacket is around your feet?” he hissed grabbing his jacket with such force I almost stumbled on my heels.

“It’s not what it looks like I swear. H-he was just helping me found the restroom Iz!” I cried pushing Axl out of the way and following Izzy like a lost puppy.

“I can’t do this right now. Not when I’m about to preform with him.” he spat walking away from me briskly.

I looked back at Axl who was quiet, almost like he was still processing the situation.

“We can’t be together-

“Why. Why not?” he asked walking up to me with wide eyes.

“I-I can’t answer that.”

Conflicted : Pt. 13🎀

Maddy P.O.V

I spent the day alone at the apartment.

Duff said I was allowed to go and enjoy L.A. by myself if I wished but I declined. I wasn’t in the mood to go out. All I wanted to do was rot in bed and keep the sunlight out.

Izzy didn’t know about Axl and I’s encounter at the movie theater and I intended to keep it that way. I most definitely didn’t need Izzy riled up anymore than he already was when he left here last night.

He was mad at me because Axl kissed me but I don’t think he knew how much I cared about him. I would never let Axl do that but he did it out of nowhere.

But I felt as if Izzy was overreacting a bit about the whole thing.

Ever since I slept with Axl, I’ve noticed both of them are a little more stand-off ish than usual.

But today wasn’t the day to worry about that. I stayed home so I could relax and have sometime to think about what I wanted to do.

Should I just come clean about the Axl encounter with Izzy or hide it forever? Or should I tell Axl to back off and that I don’t like him even though I do?

I felt like such a bad person for feeling like this towards Axl but I knew that my feelings for him were just like a mere crush compared to Izzy.

Izzy was the one who had my heart and so, maybe it was better off leaving everything the way it was.

.

.

.

“Maddy! We’re home.” my older brother yelled, letting the door slam behind him.

“That was loud.” I mumbled, staring at my brother and Izzy who were sitting on the couch now, facing towards me.

Izzy was staring right at me with an uneasy attitude while Duff was too wasted to notice anything unusual was going on between the both of us.

“Come sit.” my brother slurred, scooting over so that there was an empty spot in between him and Izzy.

I hesitated before slowly trudging to the empty spot hoping my brother would all of a sudden change his mind or drunkenly fall asleep,landing right on the empty spot.

But unfortunately none of that happened and I was now lodged between the two with little to no room to scoot over and stretch my legs out.

“My two best friends. I hope one day you’ll be my brother in law Iz! As much as you get on my nerves, I can tolerate you the most, out of all the guys.” Duff sputtered on the brink of passing out due to the heavy alcohol consumption he had done earlier.

“Okay man. I think you should take a nap or something.” Izzy scoffed acting as if Duff had just told him the worst possible thing ever.

“What’s wrong with what he said?” I asked, shifting in between the two of them to face Iz with my nose scrunched.

“I sure as hell wouldn’t want to be Duff’s brother in law.” he spat slumping back into the couch.

“I-f you need m-me I’ll be in my room.” my brother hiccuped while stumbling into his room.

“If you’re mad at me about Axl then you need to quit it already.” I huffed stomping my feet on the ground, annoyed at Izzy’s constant bullying.

“I’m not mad.” he shrugged, pulling out his guitar from the case.

I abruptly grabbed the guitar and placed it on the other side of the couch where Duff was sitting before he left and crawled into his lap, facing him.

“Please talk to me. M’ sorry.” I whispered, stroking his hair away from his face so I could see his eyes clearly.

“I’m not mad at you Maddy. It’s just, I see the way he looks at you and I can tell he likes you.”

“Well, you have nothing to worry about, because I’m in love with you.” I said, giving him a reassuring peck on the lips.

“I love you a lot.”

“I love you too.” he replied leaning forward to french kiss me.

“Show me.” I breathed out,feeling him grind up against my thin layer of shorts.

He tossed me down on the couch and climbed on top of me, pushing my hair away from my neck to leave glistening wet kisses all the way down to my breasts.

“Have you ever been eaten out?” he asked, looking up from my breasts on which he was sucking on with his swollen lips.

“N-no.” I whispered suddenly feeling small underneath him knowing he had years of experience, ever since he had joined Guns N’ Roses, women would just flock to the guys naturally.

Offering whatever they had which usually included blowjobs, tits and pussy.

He tugged on my shorts, pulling them off and throwing them somewhere across the room and placing a kiss to my panties which didn’t have a bow on them this time but instead a nice lace trim across the top.

I stared at the ceiling the whole time he was taking my panties off, feeling really nervous because I had never done this before and I didn’t know how exactly it was going to feel.

“Baby it’s okay. I’ll take care of you.” Izzy cooed gently grabbing my hand to give it a quick kiss.

I sat up on my elbows to see his mouth attacking me with kisses, that were so slow that I could feel the suction of my pussy every-time he let go of the kiss.

It felt foreign at first, since it was my first time having someone basically make out with my pussy but as he started to fuck my hole with his tongue, the sensation turned into ecstasy.

“Izzy!” I whimpered feeling his nose bump into my clit, making me gush out my gooey wetness even more, spilling onto my thighs.

“Fuck- get up.” Iz demanded sitting me upright.

“O-Okay.” I mumbled, drunk on whatever he had just done to my lower region.

He lied on the couch with his back down, asking me to sit on his face.

“I’ve never done that.” I muttered, feeling too shy to muster any confidence to do what he said.

“Come on baby. I’ll make you feel so good.” he encouraged, tugging on my hand to pull myself towards him.

I still didn’t feel confident enough but the ache between my thighs was slowly dying, after feeling the cold breeze of the apartment slowly diminish the arousal surrounding my bare pussy.

So I slowly swung my leg around Izzy’s face when all of a sudden he pushed me down onto his face and brought his arms around my inner thighs, locking me in place as he got to work.

“Taste so good.” he mumbled, sucking and licking all over my pussy.

I grinded back onto his face loving the feeling of hearing the lewd noises of his slurping and the kisses being placed all over my inner lips.

“Uh.” I moaned, taking off my top, leaving me completely naked for his pleasure.

He grabbed onto my breasts kneading them roughly, making me grab onto his hair to push his nose harder against my clit, feeling my orgasm coming closer.

“You like it when I eat your pussy huh.” Izzy groaned slapping my ass, making me buck my hips.

“Uh-huh.” I blubbered unable to speak properly as I felt his tongue trace my pussy up and down, side to side and in circles.

“So fucking sexy making all those noises for me.” he grunted palming himself through his jeans.

I whimpered uncontrollably as he suctioned his mouth over my clit, letting his finger slip into my dripping wet hole, in and out causing me to break down into tears over the pleasure.

“Iz- I’m cumming-“ I whined, feeling everything go black and arching my back as my legs shook uncontrollably with my orgasm pouring down on me.

I whimpered Izzy’s name over and over again riding out my high until it was too much and his touch hurt making my pussy overly sensitive.

I rolled off of him completely naked and exhausted as I lied down on the other side of the couch with my legs stretched out on Iz.

My eyes fluttered as I caught my breath from my intense orgasm reaching out for Izzy with shaky hands.

He climbed on top of me again but this time to give me a kiss on the cheek and cuddle with me.

“That was so hot baby.” he smirked kissing down my neck.

“I can help you if you want.” I told him, running my hands through his hair.

“It’s okay baby. You can do it another night. Let’s go to sleep for now.” he said cuddling into my naked body like I was his favorite stuffed animal.

“Izzy I have to put some clothes on.” I giggled pushing him away to grab my clothes from the floor.

“Alright.” he groaned, slightly smirking at what he had just done to me earlier as he tossed the blanket over both of us.

I felt happy with him.

I just hoped he wouldn’t want to break up with me when I left for Seattle after summer was over.

Conflicted : Pt 12🎀

Maddy P.O.V

Izzy and I slipped back into the theatre without Duff looking at us twice.

Axl noticed though. He nudged me a bit and looked at me with a questioned look over his face.

“What?” I asked, not able to hide the wide grin that was apparent on my face.

“You guys fucked for sure.” he laughed causing Slash and Duff to look our way.

“Shut up Axl.” I huffed hitting his shoulder and turning the head away from the two boys.

“Axl your ruining the movie with your laughing.” Slash groaned pushing Axl.

Axl bumped into me causing me to fall on Izzy’s lap.

“Axl!” I yelled getting up from Izzy’s lap and standing in front of him.

“It wasn’t me. It was Slash I swear!” he shrugged putting his hands out to point at Slash who was cluelessly looking around.

“Come on. I’m sorry okay?” he apologized grabbing my hand to give it a kiss.

“Fuck off.” Izzy spat pulling Axl’s hand apart from mine and pulling me into his lap.

“Okay let’s just leave. Since no one wants to watch the movie.” Duff shouted rolling his eyes as he left down the stairs.

We all followed shortly after, deciding that we were all hungry and wanted to go eat at the diner.

.

.

.

Axl had lodged himself right next to me, with Izzy on the other side, growing more irritated by the second of Axl’s growing affection for me.

“Maddy what are you getting?” Izzy asked looking up from the menu.

“Pancakes.” I grinned, looking over at the booth in front of us with a freshly stacked plate of buttermilk pancakes.

I hadn’t eaten this whole day so I was carving up a huge appetite.

“I want pancakes too.” Axl smirked looking at me.

Izzy rolled his eyes at Axl’s innuendo, putting his arm around me to pull me closer towards him.

“What’s the matter Izzy. Scared you’ll loose your girl to me.” Axl joked seeing how Izzy was trying to get me away from him.

“What’s your deal Ax. Why are you up on my girl all of a sudden.” he retorted looking at him stern faced.

“Because I can.” Axl replied pulling me to him.

“I can because I’m Axl Rose and I can do whatever I want, like this.” he said before grabbing my face and planting an open mouthed kiss.

“What the fuck!” Izzy shouted getting up from his seat to push Axl away roughly.

“Get up.”

“Izzy chill I was just messing with you.” Axl shrugged.

Before Axl could think of another snarky remark, Izzy punched him really hard causing his head to snap back.

“Izzy!” I squealed, staring at Axl’s bloody face in shock.

“Maddy why are you defending him.” Izzy spat looking at me with disgust.

“I’m not defending him but you shouldn’t have done that baby.” I said trying to grab his hand, but he pulled it away and excused himself to get up from the booth.

“Fuck him.” I heard Axl mutter as he scrambled to get himself up and grab a bunch of napkins.

“Here.” I said wetting the napkin with some water to get rid of the blood that was now stained and crusting a bit on the side of his face.

“M sorry about Izzy. I don’t know what came over him but you shouldn’t have kissed me Axl.”

“I’m sorry too. I’m just jealous that Izzy has someone like you.”

“What do you mean?” I asked looking up at him.

“You’re so kind, and caring and you’re not like those girls who sleep around. That’s pretty rare if you ask me.” he sighed.

“Thanks Axl. And I’m sure you’ll find someone great very soon. Your not a bad person like everyone thinks your are.”

“Thanks Maddy. That means a lot actually.” he said looking into my eyes.

I didn’t realize that we were both staring into each others eyes when Duff coughed all of a sudden, making us both jump.

“Maddy, Izzy left back home.” Duff said making me get up from the booth.

“Where are you going?” my brother asked grabbing my hand to stop me.

“Back home to Izzy.” I said before I left the diner and called a taxi, leaving the rest behind.

.

.

.

“Izzy!” I shouted as soon as I entered the apartment, looking around for any signs of him.

I checked Duff’s room which was empty and the living room which was also empty of Iz.

“In here.” a voice spoke from inside of my room.

I opened the door to my room and saw Izzy sitting on my bed with the tv on.

He was watching Tommy.

It was one of his favorite movies from his childhood so I had bought it for him during my stay here in L.A. so we could watch it together on nights when we would both stay up late.

I climbed up on the bed and sat next to him, putting an arm around his waist to which he removed.

“Iz. What’s wrong?” I asked cupping his cheeks to face me.

He removed the grasp of his cheeks from my hands and scooted away a bit from me.

“Are you and Ax secretly in love with each other or something?” he spit quietly but harshly.

“Are you mad because I helped him! He was bleeding for god’s sake and I was worried.” I shouted sitting up on my knees to face him.

“I left Maddy and you didn’t even care. You were too busy kissing Axl and making him feel better.” he hissed staring blankly at the television screen.

“I love you.” I told him attempting to grab his face so I could kiss him but he kept moving away from me like I wasn’t his girlfriend and some annoying hooker that wouldn’t leave him alone.

“Izzy please. I love you.” I whined, tears dropping onto my cheeks from frustration.

“No you don’t. Or else you wouldn’t have let Axl kiss you like that in front of everyone.” he scoffed getting up from the bed and throwing the tv remote hard, against the wall.

I jumped a little from his sudden outburst and crawled further into my blanket, covering myself with it to drown out the noises of my sobbing.

I didn’t think that I liked Axl. I really didn’t but after he was treating me so nicely I couldn’t help but feel a little attraction towards him.

There was also the fact that I shared something so special with him like loosing my virginity.

But I loved Izzy there was no changing that. I just didn’t know how to let Axl down easy.

Conflicted: Pt 11🎀

(i rewrote this bcuz the other version of this chapter lowkey didn’t make sense to me!!!)

Maddy P.O.V

The next day I decided to spend the day with Izzy since Duff knew about our relationship now.

I wanted to make the most out of it because I had no idea what I was going to do when I left L.A. after the summer was over.

“Are you ready?” Izzy yelled causing me sped up the rest of my makeup routine.

“Yes!” I replied shoving myself into my sundress and combing my hair.

“Finally. I’ve been waiting for like 30 minutes.”

“Geez. I’m sorry.” I spat grabbing Duff’s keys.

“It’s okay. Next time be quicker or else I’ll leave with Angela.”

“What!” I yelled staring at him with a confused look on my face.

“I’m only kidding Maddy.” he laughed coming up to kiss me.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” I grinned kissing him before we both left to go to the movies.

On the way there I could see the hills in the background of L.A. peek out and it reminded me so much of home but instead of hills we had mountains back in Seattle.

“This reminds me so much of home.” I sighed leaning against the window.

“Your from Seattle right? I’ve heard so many good things about it from Duff.”

“Yeah. I love it there. It’s definitely not as glamorous as L.A. but that’s my home.”

“I feel you. Sometimes I miss Indiana too but then I remember there’s nothing for me over there. My future lies in L.A.”

“Yeah and me of course!” I winked causing him to let out a a little laugh.

“So I wanted to ask you something?”

“Yeah. What?” he asked raising his brow.

“What’s gonna happen to us when I go back to Seattle?” I asked wondering whether or not he would tell me something I wanted to hear or the opposite.

“I don’t know Maddy. I guess time will time.” he sighed shaking his head.

What does he mean by that.

As he turned the corner the movie theatre came into view and on the sign outside in big black bold letters read “BATMAN”.

“HEY GUYS!” I heard as soon as we stepped out of the car.

Oh my god. What was Duff doing here with Slash and Axl?!?!?

“Izzy did you tell them we were coming to watch a movie.” I whined stomping my foot.

“I swear I didn’t say a word.” he shrugged putting his hands in the air.

“Soooo guys what movie are we watching!” Slash grinned with his dark black shades covering his eyes.

“Batman.” Axl replied looking rather angry.

“Hi Axl.” I waved, rather nervously after what had happened between us both.

“Hey.” he harshly replied before walking off with Slash to go get tickets.

“The fuck.” Izzy responded looking off at Axl in confusion.

“I-It’s fine let’s just go.” I said tugging on Izzy’s arm to follow them in line for tickets.

“We’re all going to see Batman. Looks like we’ll be in the same theater room.” Duff grinned holding up all our tickets.

“Did you do this on purpose!” I huffed scrunching my nose in anger at my older brother.

“No Maddy I did not.” he replied rolling his eyes at me before walking off to the ICEE machine.

“Look at my mouth guys!” Slash laughed sticking out his tongue which was now a dark blue color due to the raspberry ICEE he was slurping on.

Axl looked and rolled his eyes at the scene.

I noticed Axl didn’t have anything in his hand so I offered to get him something.

“Axl did you want anything? I was gonna go get some candy?”

“Coming from you. No thanks.” he scoffed crossing his arms.

“Did I do something?” I asked wondering why he had this sudden attitude change.

“Nope. Not at all.” he replied casually walking past me with Duff and Slash to the theatre.

“Forget about him Maddy. He’s not your problem.” Izzy groaned grabbing my hand in his and leading me to our seats.

I squinted my eyes trying to look at the dimly lit theatre to see where exaclty and seat was and you can imagine the shock on my face when I see my seat is right next to Axl.

And Izzy is right next to me. Making me the monkey in the middle.

Great.

“This will be interesting.” Axl smirked shifting in his seat towards me.

Wasn’t he just mad earlier?

“Keep your eyes on the movie Axl.” Izzy threatened giving him a stare.

Axl just rolled his eyes and grabbed a handful of popcorn shoving it in his mouth.

“Hey! That’s my popcorn.” Slash whined grabbing it and putting it away from Axl.

“It’s mine too. I paid half!” Axl argued grabbing it again causing some of the popcorn to go flying in the air.

“Guys! Behave for god’s sake.” Duff shouted as the movie lights became even dimmer and eventually shut off completely, signaling the start of the movie.

Izzy and I got comfortable in our seat and I leaned my head against his shoulder halfway in the movie trying hard not to fall asleep.

I could feel Axl staring at us throughout the movie as we cuddled but I ignored it not thinking too much about it.

“Can you guys move please. I have to pee.” Axl groaned shoving my legs aside to get through to the stairs.

“You could’ve waited.” I thought rolling my eyes as Axl’s childish behavior at times.

“Don’t worry about it. He’s just an ass like that.” Izzy said noticing the look on my face.

“It’s okay.” I said giving him an assuring smile.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” Izzy grinned.

I leaned in and gave him a kiss unable to control myself when he started at me with those soft eyes of his.

He was so handsome.

“Your so handsome Izzy.” I moaned deepening the kiss and grabbing at him to pull him closer towards me.

“Ew!” I heard my older brother spat making me pull away quickly and sheepishly grin.

“I don’t know. I thought it was hot.” Slash smirked giving me a wink.

I blushed and looked away towards the movie screen seeing Izzy with a similar smirk plastered over his face.

“Tell Duff you have to use the restroom.” he whispered as he got up and left quickly so Duff and Slash wouldn’t notice.

“D-Duff. I have to go pee.” I muttered not giving him a chance to reply as I rushed down the stairs and opened the exit door, letting the cool air touch my skin.

I didn’t see Izzy so I continued walking down the narrow corridor of the theatre when I ran into Axl by accident.

“Watch where you’re going sweetie.” he said giving me a tight lipped smile.

“What’s your deal! I haven’t done anything to you today and your being so mean.” I shouted.

He looked rather harshly towards me at my behavior and grabbed my arm really tight to pull me aside.

“Why are you with him?”

“Izzy?”

“Yeah. I thought you two broke up after what happened.” he said referring to what conspired between the both of us.

“I love him. You know that.” I replied stern faced.

“I could treat you way better than Iz.” he whispered twirling a lock of my hair in his finger and caressing my arm with his fingertips.

“Axl stop. I’m with Izzy.”

I pushed him away from me and ran off desperately trying to find Izzy.

“What’s wrong?” Izzy asked catching me at the end of the corridor.

“N-nothing. Was just looking for you.” I lied not wanting to tell him about my encounter with Axl.

“C’mere.” he tugged, taking me to a corner of the corridor where no one could see us.

“You looked so good in this dress. I had to take you out for a bit so I could play with it.” he mumbled playing with the lace fabric on the ends.

I stared up at him with my big brown eyes waiting for him to do something as I had always secretly dreamed about in my bed at night.

He leaned in slowly and brought his lips to mine, capturing them in a french kiss.

“Taste so good. Like strawberries.” he said, licking my lips with his tongue before messily pulling me back into a sloppy kiss.

He ran his hand up my thigh letting go of the lace to slip a finger into my panties testing how much I could take.

“Fuck I wanna take you from behind right here.” he groaned feeling how nicely my pussy sucked in his finger.

“I’ve been waiting for you to fuck the shit out of me from the day I met you.” I whined looking up at him and spewing out all of my dirty thoughts which were coming to mind at a rapid rate everytime his finger curled upwards in my pussy.

I didn’t hold back and he could see it the way I was begging, whining and breathing out for him basically like a bitch in heat.

“I’ve turned you into a bad girl huh. What happened to my innocent little baby” he asked with a smug look on his face.

“I’m still your good girl but I wanna be a dirty girl right now for your cock.” I mumbled looking at him rather seductively as I had seen on television.

“Be quiet or else someone will hear.” he spat, roughly grabbing a handful of my hair and pulling me close to his face so he could swallow all my moans with his lips.

“I don’t care if Duff sees me. I want you.” I moaned feeling myself getting tighter around his fingers.

“Wait don’t cum yet. Get on your knees.” he said pulling on my hair to yank me down.

“You have to suck me off before I fuck you hard or else it’ll hurt.”

“O-okay.” I nodded looking up at him with big doe eyes as I took his jeans off, suddenly feeling a new sense of confidence, wanting nothing more than to please him.

I had no idea what I was doing but I nodded at everything he said wanting to please him as I looked up at him like a deer in headlights.

“Baby just suck on it like a lollipop okay.” he cooed noticing my behavior before he cupped my cheek and rubbed his dick between my lips, slapping it a few times on my cheek.

I let out a big glob of spit and let it run down his dick before rubbing it in with my hand and giving it a few kisses on the tip like I would on his lips.

I slowly stared sucking on it as much as I could fit in my mouth while rubbing off the part that wouldn’t fit.

“Fuck just like that baby. You look so looking sexy like this with my cock in your mouth. Like a dirty little slut.” he groaned bucking his hips forward.

He let me suck on it for a few more seconds before choving my head forward causing me to choke and then letting me up to breathe.

“Turn around baby.”

I lifted up my dress and put my hands on the wall so he could easily take me from behind.

I wiggled my ass for him as the puffy pink lips of my pussy were on display for him and the moment I had been waiting for ever since we met was finally happening.

“I don’t think I can be gentle with you.” he grunted shoving his cock inside me roughly.

Even though I wasn’t a virgin anymore I still felt the occasional pinch whenever he went deeper and I couldn’t help but out let tiny squeals causing him to slow down occasionally.

“Not even a virgin and I still have to fuckin open this pussy up huh?” he said spewing out all these filthy phrases I’d never heard before or experienced, making me go dumb.

“S-so big.” I babbled unable to think straight as I felt his girth stretching me out way more than Axl’s.

“Did Axl fuck you like this?” he asked grabbing my hair in a ponytail and jackhammering into my pussy.

“F-Feels so good I-Iz.” I sobbed hearing the wet sounds of his cock going in and out my pussy.

I could feel my arousal coating my thighs.

“Answer me.”

“N-no no he didn’t. I didn’t get f-fucked this good.” I whined, talking obscenely on the brink of orgasm.

He pulled out abruptly and turned me around to face him before sliding back in.

“Wanna see you when you cum.” he whispered kissing me and letting his tongue mix with mine.

“Faster Izzy. I’m gonna cum.” I whined as my back arched and my eyes rolled back involuntarily.

“Fuck yeah take my fucking cock. Cum all over it baby.” he grunted leaving red imprints on my waist from gripping it so tight.

“Uhnnn- I’m cumming.” I squealed before my vision went black and my legs shook rapidly.

“Shit shit shit.” he said before releasing inside me.

He let me down allowing me to fix my dress while he pulled his pants up and grabbed my shaky hand to give it a soft kiss.

“That was so good Iz.” I giggled with my newly flushed face and reddened cheeks, all of a sudden too embarrassed to look him in the eyes after all the dirty things I did.

“Yeah? I’m glad.”

Conflicted : Pt 10🎀

Maddy P.O.V

I didn’t recognize the man in front of me at first but as I adjusted my vision a curly haired man came into view.

“You slept with Axl.” he giggled like a school girl who had just heard her best friends biggest secret.

“Yeah I know.” I sighed afraid of what Izzy was gonna do to Axl.

“Slash I’m scared for Axl. I think Izzy is going to kill him.”

“Nah don’t worry about it. They’ll be fine.” he mumbled struggling to stand upright and tipping backwards onto the hard marble floor.

Great. He’s drunk.

“Urghhh.” I groaned slapping my hand against my forehead at the thought of having to break up Izzy and Axl’s fight.

It wasn’t Axl’s fault at all. It was mine for making such a careless mistake and Axl shouldn’t be punished for it.

I made my way up the stairs slowly, cringing at every step expecting the two of them to come flying out and throwing punches.

But instead I heard them yelling at each other to no end.

“Bro relax. It’s not like she didn’t want it!” I heard Axl argue.

I rounded the corner of the hallway and found the open door to Axl’s room and made my way inside, silencing both of them.

“Maddy tell him you wanted it as much as I did.” Axl said rolling his eyes at Izzy.

“Is this true?” Izzy asked looking over at me with those beautiful eyes of his.

What did I get myself into!

“Y-yes Izzy I did.”

“How could you?”

“How could I? You told me you didn’t love me multiple times and made it clear you didn’t feel anything towards me!” I shouted.

“I didn’t mean to sleep with Axl but it just happened.”

“You slept with him of all people.” Izzy huffed putting his hands on his hips.

“Well I hope you both have a nice life and become boyfriend or girlfriend whatever.” he spat exiting the room leaving both of us without a goodbye.

I followed after him, attempting to stop him but Izzy was too quick and while I tried to grab out to him I ended up tripping over myself and fell.

“Ow.” I muttered holding my foot while on the ground.

Izzy quickly turned around upon hearing my fall and I saw his face soften seeing me hurt but then he rolled his eyes at me.

“Y’know I didn’t really take you for a groupie. But since you slept with Axl, who knows, you’ll probably sleep with him next.” he said pointing to Slash.

“I said I’m sorry! I didn’t even want to sleep with him but I was upset after we had that fight. I even thought of you while he was fucking me.” I told Izzy hoping he’d understand and come around.

But he didn’t.

“You still did it Maddy. It doesn’t matter if you thought about me or not. I thought you were special but you just turned out to be one of those girls who got close to me just for Axl.”

“I am not!” I shouted, having heard enough and pushing past him to get a taxi and go home.

“Maddy you can’t call a taxi at a private property. I’m going to drop you or else Duff will be worried sick.”

“Don’t do me any favors. I don’t want to be in any car with you.” I spat crossing my arms.

“I don’t have a choice. And I’m only doing it for Duff.” he said opening the car and hopping in the front seat.

“Come on. I don’t have all day.”

“Wait what about Slash!” I asked while buckling myself into the passenger seat, wondering if he had woken up by now or not.

“Forget about him.” he aggressively replied slamming on the accelerator and speeding down the road.

“Izzy slow down.”

“Y’know I thought I loved you Maddy. I really did but you just turned out to be like all the other girls.”

“I’m not like other girls and you know that too.” I insisted getting upset over his continuous insults.

“I’m gonna call Angela tonight and sleep with her. How would you feel about that.” he said pushing it in my face.

“I wouldn’t mind.” I mumbled, obviously lying straight through my teeth.

“Okay fine. Then I will!” he yelled pulling into the parking garage for Duff’s apartment.

I saw Duff standing at the elevator waiting for us with his arms crossed against his chest.

He was pissed.

“Wait Izzy. Duff can’t see me like this. Can I borrow your jacket please.” I begged grabbing at his arm.

“Whatever. I’m just doing this so he doesn’t think it was me who you slept with because that would be worse.” he spat shoving his jacket off himself and throwing it towards me.

I quickly put his jacket on and headed towards Duff trying to put a normal face on.

“Duff I’m okay.” I said attempting to calm him down.

“Maddy do you have any idea what went through my head when I woke up and saw you weren’t in your room!” he yelled making me cringe.

“It’s okay man. I found her at Axl-

“Axl’s?!?!?”

“What the hell were you doing over there?” he asked, his eyebrows furrowed with anger.

“I-I was just staying the night there because I was angry at you. I promise I didn’t do anything else.” I shrugged.

He seemed to believe me but I wasn’t entirely sure if he was acting to make this whole thing go by faster or if he was just relieved to see me.

“I just worry about you, y’know. You’re my responsibility and if anything were to happen to you I wouldn’t forgive myself and mom would kill me.” he sighed pushing me into his chest.

I wrapped my arms around my brother and leaned in his hug, feeling very safe all of a sudden and like nothing was gonna hurt me anymore.

A few tears fell down my cheeks but I quickly wiped them away not wanting Duff to see.

“By the way why are you wearing Izzy’s jacket?” Duff asked looking at the both of us.

“She was-

“Cold!” I interrupted pretending to shiver to sell it.

“Yeah okay whatever.”

We walked back to the apartment and I immediately ran to my room jumping on my bed.

I was so happy to be back here and on good terms with my brother.

I guess he forgot about the whole Izzy thing.

“Maddy! We still need to talk y’know about the whole Izzy thing.” he shouted against my closed door.

I rolled my eyes and threw Izzy’s jacket off of me as well as my other clothes escaping to the shower.

“Can’t right now, about to shower Duff. Maybe later.” I yelled shutting my bathroom door.

I wish I could hide in here forever.

Duff P.O.V

“Okay spill it. I know you know what she was doing at Axl’s house.” Duff asked crossing his arms against his chest.

“She was telling the truth man.”

No she wasn’t.

“So are you two like a thing now or what?”’he asked changing the topic.

“I don’t know. I guess.” I shrugged flopping down on the couch, letting out a long sigh.

“What do you mean. Either you do or don’t. There’s no in between with my sis Izzy.”

“Yeah I know.” I replied rolling my eyes at his persistence.

“I really care about Maddy okay. I want to be with her if she wants the same.”

“Okay well then if you’re going to date my little sis you have to treat her with the respect those other girls you mess with deserve.”

“You’re not gonna treat Maddy like some hooker because she’s not. I know the type of girl she is and I’m telling you right now she’s too good for you.” he added mildly annoyed that this was even a conversation he had to have.

“Duff I promise I’ll take care of Maddy very good. She’s not just any girl. I know that too.” I told him, letting him know that I knew Maddy was special and she wasn’t about to get treated like some cheap whore.

“As for other stuff just lay off because she’s sort of a late bloomer if you know what I mean.” he cringed clearing his throat.

Oh I know.

“Yeah yeah okay.” I agreed knowing damn well I was going to do whatever I pleased with Maddy now that I found out she had sex with Axl.

If she wanted to have sex with him then she was going to learn the hard way that she shouldn’t have done it.

As much as I still wanted to get her alone to fuck the shit out of her, she’d have to wait awhile before I even touched her again. Because I couldn’t get the image of Axl and her out of my head just yet.

“Izzy!” Duff shouted catching my attention.

“What.”

“Promise you won’t break her heart . She’s very fragile when it comes to love and that type of shit.”

“I promise.” I told him, very unsure myself if I was going to keep my word.

Conflicted: Pt.9🎀

Maddy P.O.V

“Fuck you Izzy!” I screamed running back to the apartment and slamming the door.

Tears were streaming down my face like a river, and I couldn't even talk to Duff to make things better.

I felt like I had done the worst thing conceivable to my brother, and the guilt was eating away at me as I stared at the ceiling.

I had to get out of here and get some fresh air. But I only knew of one place.

Axl’s.

He showed it to me while giving me the tour of Los Angeles. I actually liked it a lot since he had a house all the way up in the hills. Duff had mentioned something about moving there soon but for now I was glad they didn’t live close.

"Fuck it." I thought as I changed into a cute denim skirt and slipped on my zip up jacket.

I grabbed my sneakers and left the apartment ushering a taxi as soon as I exited the apartment complex.

“Where to miss?” the taxi driver asked me.

“The hills.”

“You got it.” he nodded putting the car into drive and pulling out of the curb.

It wasn’t too far of a drive but a good 15 minutes from where Duff lived.

As soon as I got to his house I quickly ran to the door knocking on it softly.

I didn’t want him to think I was so desperate to come and see him or else that would be embarrassing. Especially since I really had nowhere else to go.

“Coming!” yelled a deep voice from inside.

The door opened abruptly and there was Axl standing before me shirtless and wearing a pair of boxers.

“Maddy?” he smirked.

“Is it o-okay if I stay the night with you? Duff and I got into an argument earlier.”

“Of course. Come in.” he said extending his arm out to usher me inside.

“What happened?”

“He found out about Izzy and I. And then Izzy had an argument with me and stormed off.” I sighed trying my best not to cry in front of Axl.

He sat me down on the couch and comforted me about Duff.

“He’ll come around. He’s your brother y’know he’s just looking out for you.” he stated throwing his arm around me for a tight hug.

“So what’s the deal between you and Iz?” he asked with an eyebrow raised.

“Nothing. I told him I loved him and he ran off telling me I was just a kid and that he didn’t feel the same way.”

Axl laughed before shaking his head.

“Typical. He runs away from true love every chance he gets.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean Izzy’s a fucking dumbass who doesn’t know something good if it hit him in the fucking face.” he snorted rolling his eyes.

Axl scooted closer towards me and looked me in my eyes brushing my hair off my face.

“He wouldn’t know how to treat someone as special as you.” he whispered cupping my cheek in his hand.

“Axl.” I breathed out suddenly realizing how close we were to each others face.

“I’ve wanted you ever since I saw you Maddy.”

Now is the moment. This is what you were waiting for.

Anything to make Izzy jealous right?

I leaned in, softly pressing my lips against Axl’s, signaling consent.

And he responded by grabbing onto the back of my hair and forcefully pressing his lips onto mine.

“Fuck.” he muttered grabbing me and pulling me on his lap.

I continued kissing him as best as I learned from Izzy which was different from Axl’s style.

Axl was more aggressive and loved tongue.

“Have you and Izzy fucked yet?” he asked briefly pulling away from my lips and attacking my neck instead.

“Uhm no.” I whimpered unable to concentrate as he moved my hips back and forth on his hardened member.

He flipped me back down so that he was hovering over me and pulled my skirt down leaving me in my pale pink panties.

“Cute.” he grinned pulling them down harshly and throwing them on the floor somewhere.

He started to peel off his boxers when I stopped him.

“W-wait. I’ve never done this before.”

He stared at me like I had said a funny joke and looked rather amused.

“Your kidding right?” he laughed.

“No.” I whispered looking up at him and hoping he didn’t act weirdly about it.

“Okay well it’ll hurt at first.” he casually shrugged not phased over the fact that I just told him I was a virgin.

I suddenly felt weird knowing he probably did this to a lot of girls and didn’t care about being their first.

He threw his boxers on the floor and unzipped my jacket letting my breasts fall out since I didn’t bother wearing a bra.

“Fuck those tits are hot.” he groaned before putting my leg over his shoulder and gliding his dick back and forth over the strings of wetness that were connecting my pussy to his dick.

“C-can you go slow please?” I mumbled, suddenly feeling way too nervous about the whole situation.

“Yes baby. I’ll go slow.” Axl said leaning forward to pull me into a kiss.

I placed both of my hands on either side of his face so I could kiss him throughout the whole process hoping it would make me feel better but most importantly go by faster.

He pulled away for a brief moment to look down at his dick going inside my pussy when I thought of Izzy and how I wanted him to be my first.

But it was too late because all of a sudden I felt the worse pain I’ve ever felt in my life and saw Axl’s dick wasn’t even halfway in.

“Ow ow!” I squealed crunching my face in pain.

“It’s gonna hurt at first but it’ll feel way better after you get used to it.” he cooed planting his lips back on mine to help distract me from the pain.

He eventually bottomed out and started moving a little while later.

“Shit your so fucking tight.”

He took his dick out of my pussy before slamming into it roughly and pounded it relentlessly.

“Axl s-slow down please. It hurts.” I mumbled as he left large purple hickeys on my neck and titties.

“I am but I can’t help that your pussy is just fucking sucking me in.” he said lusting over how wet and tight my pussy was.

“Mmpph that feels good.” I whined feeling his dick hit a spot inside my pussy that felt so good.

He kept fucking me roughly as I felt my pussy clench around him rather tightly, feeling like I was going to explode.

“Are you gonna cum baby?” Axl asked pulling out quickly to spit on my clit and rub it in with his dick before sliding back in with a squelching noise.

“Y-Yeah ’m gonna cum all over your dick.” I stuttered with lust ridden eyes.

“Fuck yeah talk dirty to me Maddy. Such a fucking good girl for Iz but a total slut on my cock.” he moaned feeling himself twitch inside me.

“Cum inside me.” I whimpered grabbing onto his hand as mine shook uncontrollably from my orgasm.

“Yeah baby you want my kids. Fuck stay still.” he grunted blowing his hot load inside of me, filling me up.

He rode out his orgasm before flopping down on the other side of the couch and grabbing a cigarette.

As I came down from my rush I quickly felt a huge sense of guilt wash through me.

“What’s wrong baby?” Axl asked noticing discomfort.

“Nothing. I need to go home now.” I meekly responded as I grabbed my clothes suddenly feeling as though they were too small and I was too exposed.

“You’re not going anywhere Maddy. It’s like 3 in the morning and I don’t want you going in a taxi alone at this time.” he argued grabbing my hand.

I shoved my hand away from his grasp and scooted closer to the end of the couch where he wasn’t.

“Okay I’ll sleep here then.” I harshly respond.

“Did I do something?” Axl asked wondering why I was acting so weird all of a sudden.

“No I just-….I’m tired is all.” I replied with a forced smile.

He nodded in response and left me alone as I soon fell deep into sleep forgetting about Duff and how I was going to explain to him why I was gone the whole night.

………

The next morning I woke up to a loud pounding on the door and a familiar voice.

I wasn’t exactly fully awake to comprehend who’s voice it was but went to open it anyways expecting it to be one of Axl’s house workers.

“Izzy?” I squinted rubbing my eyes.

“Maddy baby where did you go.” he frantically asked pushing my hair back to cup my cheeks accidentally revealing the dark purple bruises littered across my breast.

Izzy backed away from me for a bit analyzing my current state and my messed up clothing before gripping my wrist rather harshly, leaving a ring of redness around it.

“I fucking knew you would go to him after we argued.”

“Did you sleep with him?” he asked, nostrils flared as he felt sudden rage imagining Axl taking my virginity.

“Yes.” I replied bursting into tears.

“Fuck you.” he growled shoving past me to go find Axl.

“I can’t believe this.” a voice spoke from where Izzy was just standing.

Duff?