Some DID Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me Sooner

just gonna leave this here…

it was never really about health

Okay in my house we have a strange tradition. My mother builds this beautiful Christmas village.

It wraps all around our house through the rooms and under the trees and it’s wonderful.

Every year she hides the Christmas Vampire

This started when I was a very small got child and spread to all of my friends, including my best friend from elementary school who I just so happened to grow up and marry. Now that we have grown up and moved nearly 600 miles away we still always go home for a week at Christmas for multiple reasons, including the Christmas Vampire.

Needless to say we still partake and things have gotten heated.

Stay tuned for the epic conclusion and to see my husband and father in Lin-Manuel Miranda’s sooty costume when I find the Christmas Vampire First!

Happy Haunting!

Now that his saga has come to a close with How to Train Your Dragon 3, I gotta give appreciation to Toothless being one of my most favorite characters of all. It was love at first sight when I saw the original movie in theaters in 2010. I love characters who have strong personalities and definable traits without needing language, and Toothless is one of the best examples of this: his expressions, movements, all the little nuances in his growls and gazes and subtle body gestures - honestly, sometimes it’s hard to believe he’s not a real animal. The folks at Dreamworks did amazing work giving him such realistic creature qualities, and the amount of animation detail in the texture of his scales, the depth of his eyes, and just everything about him is full of the wonder and cuteness of any real animal. Although his story is finished, I’ll never get tired of seeings his adorable mug~!

I’m so glad my favorite boy got to end his journey on a high note. It’s been a great 9 years of following his development and I look forward to watching his movies again and again!

The Spider Queen

They were the one thing her mother hated and her father loved, the three tarantulas that had come to visit the little girl with the pink toy teapot that poured out real tea. She was always happy to see them, would get out her mismatched teaset and hand out cups - light pink for Jer, hot pink for Kei, and yellow for Mey. 

She had always been a rather odd child. Her mother a bitter human and her father an elven druid in search of knowledge, and herself a half-elf. She had a proficiency for accidental magic, even before the expected age. Yet no one could explain how she conjured tea into her little pink teapot, fresh and steaming. She refused to say, simply smiling and saying that the spiders had taught her. 

When she started school, both parents were relieved, hoping their daughter would begin to make friends with other elves or humans, or half-elves. For a bit, they thought it was working. Their daughter spoke of three little ones that she enjoyed spending time with, named Jer, Kei, and Mey. She came home with various gifts gift from the three, from a beautifully and expertly crafted white silk hair tie to a dress woven in patterns that even the most professional seamstress hadn’t seen before to a simple black friendship bracelet woven from what looked hair. Her parents were willing to ignore these strange gifts in favor of being happy that their child was interacting with other humans. 

Then, of course, the school sent a letter telling them to visit the school while the children were at lunch. The teacher sat them down, explaining that the girl didn’t interact with other children, and at recess sat beside a tree and talked to three large, alarming spiders. No matter how hard the school had tried, they were unable to either get the tarantulas off of the premises nor were they able to convince her to get them to leave. Her parents were disappointed, watching throughout recess as their daughter ran off from the group of children heading for the playground to sit beside a tree and talk to the spiders that had grown exponentially. They were now half the size that she was, and clicking their pincers excitedly. 

The parents could do nothing, no matter what they tried - banishing spells, fire, forbidding her to ever see the spiders again. They watched as their daughter grew up, hitting puberty and pimples breaking out along her face, her insecurities arising, the spiders following her nearly everywhere; her first heartbreak, and the ensuing hug(?) that lasted forever; when she graduated, they were waiting offstage for her and clicking their pincers along with the rest of the crowd’s applause. By that time, they were as large as she was. 

She got all A’s in her classes, excelling most in nature magic, a battered little pink teapot in her backpack always. When she went off to college, they went too, and her parents frowned in disapproval at it, but said nothing. She studied history, memorizing tales of the Spider Queen, an evil woman taught and mentored by three spiders who influenced her to take over the world. 

It made her think of herself, to an extent, but never once had Jer, Kae, or Mey ever tried to tell her to take over the world. Instead, they told her that she could accomplish her goals, she was better than she believed herself to be, and listening to the bullies of her school was a bad idea. She trusted them, after they had kept her from losing herself to her own low self-esteem. So, when they told her that she was who she read about, she trusted them. She refused however, to do as her previous self had done, and rule the world. 

Instead, she pursued a career as a Shaman, a helper and selfless person who didn’t worry for herself and instead helped maintain the balance of light at dark, knowing that without one there couldn’t be the other. Her career led to her own writings, published works that gave her a name in the history books, one her past life had already had. The Spider Queen. 

Image Prompt

Rules For Ghost Hunting and Such For People Who Do Not Normally See Them

1. As someone who sees ghosts, I advise you to completely cover your skin, including ankles, hands, and your face. Except for your ears and eyes.

2. Do not ever cover your ears. You will need them to hear.

3. Do not speak aloud. Instead, focus on a mental connection. Ghost don’t like voices, and some latch onto you this way.

4. Always remember Rule 2.

5. Once they are open to you, you are open to them.

6. Experiences tend to be few and far in between. My first visual was at five, then ten, and then an unsettling amount of presences and mishaps at 15. If you are constantly seeing one, it is most likely tracking you.

7. If you have read this guide in the hopes of figuring out how to permanently get rid of a ghost, sorry. The most I know to tell you is to very clearly and loudly state they are not welcome here. This is most effective if you’ve never spoken to them before. Watch out for more tailing behind.

8. If you see a young girl named Victoria with a mangled leg, get the hell out of there and get a friend to tell her to leave. A tall man with no face may come for revenge. Prepare yourself. 

9. Always be prepared. 

10. A phone is more effective than a radio or walkie talkies if you want a buffer or distraction.

11. Stay calm and be firm. Fear is easily manipulated.

12. Your feet are the most vulnerable part of you. Make sure you can run fast and move nimbly.

13. Developing ghost tend to hide under things and in shadows. Avoid that.

14. You really shouldn’t be ghost hunting. 

15. Remember Rule 5. It is the most vital thing to know.

16. It is not always plausible to close yourself from the supernatural once you are open to it. Most chose to open themselves. Ones like me are born without a choice.

17. Do not imagine anything in particular about a ghost. You will warp the connection.

18. Stay focused on your objective.

19. Everything has an objective and a personality. Observe it.

20. Do not let them touch you. You may feel them, but if you see them attempting to touch you, break the connection. They may touch you before you see them and that is less dangerous.

21. Breaking a connection is not easy without another person who doesn’t feel it. Screaming and motion can help.

22. Footsteps when you are alone is not something to be ignored.

23. The best protection is a non-believer, or someone the ghost has decided Unnecessary.

24. Avoid anything that feels off or malicious.

25. If you saw something, you most definitely saw something. Don’t disregard it. 

26. Under no circumstances, should you panic. Period.

27. Do not expect a ghost to deem you Necessary. It is usually better to be left alone.

28. Ghost mostly appear in white and black. Watch out for colors. 

29. If you’re colorblind, do not go alone.

30. Going alone makes you both more vulnerable and more open.

31. Most ghost will stare at you. If you can’t feel that, leave. Just leave.

32. You can always move. Even when you are frozen in fear. Do not allow them to render you motionless.

33. Most ghosts are tied to a location, usually a house.

34. Trust your instincts. The connection generally defies logical thinking and the ghost will attempt to push you towards certain decisions.

35. Do not let fear taint you.

36. Banging, footsteps, scuttling, and whispering are common noises for ghosts and such.

37. Avoid small areas. 

38. Avoid rooms with too many dangerous or sharp objects.

39. Bullets do not work.

40. Do not bring any weapons beyond a heavy stick. Even that can be ill-advised.

41. Make sure clothing is form fitting. No holes, no gaps, no open zippers. Jackets are a good idea.

42. If you find yourself in a verbal conversation with a ghost, be prepared for anything. Even death. Most will not speak.

43. Powerful ones can bounce thoughts back and forth through the connection. The best thing to do is to project your thoughts at the ghost and narrate the situation. 

44. Remain in control. If a ghost attempts to take control, sever the connection.

45. The more stuff you meddle in, the more stuff that can come at you. Everything is complicated and most likely, harmful. Do not strike deals or make promises.

46. Staircases are very vulnerable. Avoid ones without handrails. You will eventually have to go down if you go up and ghost can make sure you fall.

47. Remember Rule 24, Rule 25, and Rule 34.

48. Windows and doors can be locked. I advise smashing windows if locked in and avoid rooms without them.

49. Not once I have ever encountered a ghost where it was above a cool temperature.

50. Do not follow a ghost anywhere. Water, ice, underground, forest, and anything above the first floor or flammable is a trap. Do not allow them to herd you into one either.

More guides

Surviving a Desert 

How to Befriend the Monster Under Your Bed

slowly approaching bear

if I was rich i would absolutely go all out weird. commission books handwritten in a made up language. erect strange black spires in the wood. buy a boat, make it look like a perfect copy of one that was used in an 18th century antarctic expedition, and then let it drift to shore miles away. i want every interaction with me to leave people with a sense of impending cosmic horror.

The massive downside to meaningful action on climate change is that if global warming is false were left with a clean environment and a sustainable economic model. What a bummer

reblog if AAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

given that it’s possible to defeat him by just relentlessly bullying the shit out of him until he’s too small to be a threat, there’s absolutely no way pennywise would survive in this day and age. the existence of fast, accessible internet and social media would end that clown’s entire career.