Life Goes On

Pure Gold

You mend the cracks

In my weathered roads

With pure gold

You make me feel

Like a pharaoh

Of my world

In this danger

Of a world

you make me feel safe

It seems like you will still love me after anything

You are

The kind of sweet

That doesn’t give you cavities

Too good to be true

Which is why

I physically cannot stop smiling when I’m with you

I’m just a warm blooded oaf

Turned out

To be fools gold

The Reason Why I Fell

The reason why I'm about to fall

Is because I once stood tall

Just as quick and graceful as a fawn

You are gone

‘Twas all but a dream

You secretly made me beam

Even though I shuddered

And muttered

You were so patient like the paper I leak ink on

You are gone

Big sister

Now you're a big blister

That I will never fully comprehend

A message I might send

But I know I will slip away like sand

In your pretty young hands

I felt so safe

But now I feel the chafe

We had fun

What's done is done

‘Twas all but a silly nightmare

‘Twas just a tear,

In the page,

Of a script who’s fate was to drift off stage

And that was the reason why I fell

Into this well

At dark dawn

I am gone...

Dreams

The boat left without you, you were too late

What would you do?

Just to chase your dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you jump into the water?

Would you do that even if you risked the chance of hypothermia, and just swim?

Does your dream fill you to the brim?

The bus left without you

What would you do?

Just to chase an easily broken dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you start running?

Would you do that with hurting side stitches?

Dreams can be b*tches

The train left without you

What would you do?

Just to chase your dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you try to follow the train tracks?

You’d never be able to keep up with the train

Dreams can take away your spoons, and drain

The plane left without you

What would you do?

Just to chase your already pulverized dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you drive?

You’d be late

Someone could steal your shattered fate

The team left without you

What would you do?

Just to chase you nearly impossible dream

Would you go to the extremes?

Would you push too hard and make yourself sick

Dreams can be d*cks

So what you missed your dream?, find a new one!

What do you think is fun?

Find one that you’re not too late for

Open your eyes there’s many doors

Protect you dream with your life, with the fire in your eyes, you’ll never get stuck

To life’s troubles you can just say f*ck!

Ends Are Beginnings

Ends are sometimes beginnings I need to get myself out of here Ends are the reflections of beginnings, it’s a simple mirror Is everything the same? Dead in the hall of lame Right now you and I are in between the beginning and the middle My bones are snapping, crackling and are brittle I need to know, what’s on the other side? For now I’ll let it slide Slide down my back, off my feet What is complete? Is it fullness of the heart? Or a lucky throw of the dart This reflection is not me, I’m lost But life is still well worth it’s cost So here I go and venture into the middle Me myself and I; piano, guitar and fiddle My one and only crew Some find me and my inanimate, music playing objects, infectious like the flu Just a lucky throw of the dart Is it fullness of the heart? My one and only crew Some find me and my inanimate music playing objects infectious like the flu Then on some days I find myself in between the middle and the end At writing I’m not that great, not to offend But life is still well worth it’s cost This reflection is not me, I’m lost I need a lucky throw of the dart Is it fullness of the heart? What is complete? Slide down my back, off my feet For now I’ll let it slide I need to know, what’s on the other side? Then I find myself in the end Things don’t always break sometimes they bend Dead in the hall of lame Is everything the same? Beginnings are the reflections of ends, it’s a simple mirror I need to get myself out of here Beginnings are sometimes ends

I’m In For The Ride

I find it funny that

White roses tarnish with age

I'm scared my love

Will have wrinkles the next time I will meet

Will it be you or me at the welcome mat?

Maybe I will keep your coat hanger for my rage

Like Cinderella shoe, or someone’s glove

I keep your writing as a treat

I'm in need of a deep conversation

And I think you'd be perfection

I wonder your thoughts on bottling up fear

And using the pressure like a Coke and Mentos rocket

Blast off with irritation

And safety goggles for protection

We could talk about what we think of Shakespeare

And girls pockets

When it comes to talking

I just don’t know how or where to start

Maybe I'm in need of a brave summer vacation

I have don’t have many ideas though

I just have to keep a rolling and a rocking

I also have to learn how to part

With hesitation

Learn how to jump head first into something when people are saying no

I have to learn to not think, just do

Every time I go around I want to reach for the gold rings

And see everything I can see before I can’t see

I want to know that if I failed, at least I tried

I find it funny how we all do the same motions but are different each time we carry them through

How we change slowly and want and need different things

I'm scared and I want to break free to be me

Lets see where life will show me and take me to, I'm in for the ride

Stop Pushing

I need a break

I need to break

I'm going to break

If you don’t let me have a break

I have been trained

To do what is best for me

No matter what

And I am allowed to do anything to keep myself okay

Okay

I'm currently not okay

Someone would make this okay

If they were around I think I would be o.k.

Nothing is holding me over

This is looking like a sleepless night

And not for partying reasons

Unless being burned out was a party

You don’t listen

So listen

Don’t push to the point that I don’t want to listen

Superfluous words you say and yet I continue to listen

So many words, my oh my oh me

You cant fix my life anymore, my oh my oh me

Let me handle how much I push myself, my oh my oh me

I know how much I can take without doing too much, my oh my oh me

18

The age of adulthood

And as my birthday makes its arrival

I wish you would I am scared for the future

The one that doesn’t include you

Coming undone is my suture I don’t know how long I can dream

It seems like a waste of time

When I’m oh so close to breaking at the seams 0 to 18

So far it’s been mostly pain, anxiety and depression

I’m so sorry babe, that your face is turning green A simple question, yes or no?

I shall never dare to be rude and just simply ask

Either stay or go I’m not an adult yet

People do say that I’m really mature

But I don’t even have a set I’m scared but full of grit

And yet I sit

Never quit I don’t know why

But sometimes I wish I wasn’t born

And other times I wish to die I don’t know why

I almost forgot my birthday for once

Babe, you shouldn’t fly with that sty in your poor, blue, eye Swollen, bloodshot eyes

That have been accused of not working hard enough, after an all-nighter

Babe don’t believe the lies Happy birthday

To the one with the story of bad gut and disease

Baby please, you made it all this way

I Got Worried

You should be worried about yourself

And yet you're worried about me

Even though you were in the ER the other day and still don't feel good

You worry about me staying up too late

And tell me, before you go to bed

To make sure that I don't stay up too late

When you're the one who is cold

You come to me with a pile of blankets

Even though it is you who is cold

And the same for when you're hungry

You come to me to ask if I'm hungry

Even if you know that I just ate

You worry about me choosing to walk alone

At night and in the dark

And you make me carry a flashlight because it makes you feel somewhat better

You turn the lights on

So that when I get home late from school

I am welcomed by light

And when I found out with morning confusion

That you were in the ER

That was when I got worried about you

Lonesome

The word “I” is pretty lonesome

The word lonesome is not as lonely as I

I am lonely with myself

I lost myself again, I see…

I might have just have been lost at sea

Where will I find me?

Do you ever think about me?

Did you erase me from your memory because it was too painful?

I still miss what you threw away

I took the trash out Tuesday night

And I missed you Wednesday morning

I found a song that reeks of you

I almost went to the dump to look

All I found was a clean brook

I don’t think I knew you, before you turned into a sad crook

In that brook, I tried to baptized myself in the cleanliness and got a little lost

And sometimes I have a hard time putting on my holey socks

And sometimes I forget about the locks

I is lonesome

I need guidance; I can’t learn from trash

I'm better off lonesome

The English

Streetlights changing

Shooting me into the past

Watching small raindrops collect

While I cannot collect my thoughts

Making it look like the glass is chipping

Until the windshield glasses over in a mosaic

Feeling the cold slipping in but I don’t mind

Feeling a shiver creep up my back

Reminding me of you

I take a breath

And I grab my bag and pretend that I'm putting on my armor

Suiting up

To go riding on a drunken horse, slipping on mud

While holding my breath underwater

And the English have longbows

It’s raining arrows that point me in the wrong direction

This is night

This is what I wanted

Now that I have it

I miss the struggle