Bittern At The Grocery Store

You know for a fact that I'm abandoning ship, see ya 🚣‍♂️

Japanese tea bag maker Ocean-Teabag has been making waves by creating little parcels of aroma in the shape of marine animals. Luckily for us, their wide range of tea bags are available at online Japanese novelty retailer Village Vanguard, maker of such fine products as Space Tea and cat-shaped kitchen utensils.

Ocean-Teabag’s earliest designs included beautiful dolphin tea bags filled with blue mallow tea leaves. Steeping them turns your otherwise normal pot of water into a tranquil ocean. Proving to be a hit among tea lovers, Ocean-Teabag expanded their repertoire to many other sea creatures including the sea turtle (butterfly pea jasmine tea)…

the distinctive ocean sunfish (Japanese hojicha — roasted green tea)…

the graceful manta ray (tropical mango tea)…

and even a blood-thirsty shark (blended herb tea).

The newest addition to their robust series of marine creatures is a tea bag shaped like an innocuous sea cucumber. This little parcel is filled with jasmine tea, as well as a smidgen of sea cucumber powder to lend some authenticity. Ocean-Teabag warns that some people who have a sensitive tongue may find it tasting a little fishy.

The company also crafted a deep sea series that will satisfy even the most adventurous of tea drinkers out there. A few such examples are the anglerfish (earl grey tea)…

the creepy giant isopod (Eastern Beauty oolong tea)…

the horseshoe crab (white apricot tea)…

…and lastly the king of them all, the enormous giant oarfish. ( Delicious Assam tea of epic proportions! ) Just like its namesake, it measures a whopping 19 centimeters (7.5 inches). Drinking tea becomes an art when half of your tea bag hangs out of your cup.

 While the notion of turning your cup of tea into fish-inhabiting waters is not new, these tea bags will hopefully conjure up images of gentle ocean waves in your mind. 

WHERE TO FIND THE TEA

Woe, aberrations be upon ye.

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