Such A Slut For Bruce Calling His Kids Pet Names Regardless Of Where They Are. He Called A Fully Grown

Hades/Pluto kids headcannons

Stay up till midnight every night, sometimes accidentally.

Not morning people. At all.

Breakfast is from 8-9 (idk about CJ), and they usually show with five minutes to eat, and usually just have a banana or something. They do have a stash of mini cereal box’s and mini milk cartons in case they sleep through breakfast, in which case they sleep until Will and/or Percy wake them up (Reyna/Frank at CJ)

They are total bitches until 11 everyday, and if you piss them off… let’s just say it took Chiron three hours to convince them to shadow travel that Ares kid back from Russia.

Whenever one of them is sad, the other gets blankets, make a fort over the couch and tv, buys ice cream from the camp store, and gets a sad movie.

Disney. Movie. Marathons. Usually with Reyna, Frank, and Percy (sometimes more). Hazel knows everyword to every song of every disney movie that was ever written, so movie night basically turns into karaoke at some point.

Extremely protective. Will punch anyone who disses the other, will also punch anyone who disses friends.

Reyna and Percy are their big siblings. They all argue and fight all the time, and when one is angry, ALL of them are angry. There is absolutely NO privacy between the girls, but Nico’s still really awkward with Percy, and once Nico walked in on Percy shirtless and started hyperventilating.

Hades decides he wants to be a good dad, so he invites (forces) Hazel and Nico to go to the underworld for monthly family dinners (also holidays.)

Extremely forgetful. Neither of them can remember their anniversarys, or friends birthdays, or holidays. Etc. (Hazel can’t even remember her own birthday) however, they can remember exactly what someone said in an argument on June 17th at 4:47pm.

Whenever Nico stays at CJ, he hates the guys room in the 5th cohort, and usually sleeps on the couch in the main room. Oscassionally Hazel will join him and they’ll stay up talking or playing games.

Please feel free to add on! 😊 sorry they’re not very good.

I think it needs to become common knowledge that "inability to read social cues" can show up as overcompensating.

You don't know how much misbehaviour is allowed, so you become the perfect child who never tests rules.

You don't know if someone is irritated with you, so you'll be extra generous and self-effacing.

You don't know how much is expected of you at work so you'll kill yourself in a minimum-wage job and not notice that nobody else is working like this.

"Hardworking and quiet" should be as much of an autism red flag as "ignores rules and doesn't know when to stop talking". Or why don't we just start using words to communicate so i can stop tracking everybody's eyebrow twitches, that would be great.

the problem with reading and writing leading to a strong vocabulary is that you tend to know the vibe of words instead of their meanings.

if I used this word in a sentence, would it make sense? absolutely. if you asked me what it meant, could I tell you? absolutely not.

there's a bit of a language barrier there I think I just wanted a excuse to use this headcanon, but the dudes! the guys be vibin! did have another three pages planed for this, never got around to it though,,,

transcript and extras below the cut!

Cleo: What do you mean maybe? Zed, You always talk about how well you understand Galactic??

Zedaph: Hey! I can Read galactic very well, yes! ,,,spoken is, a different story however,,, Gem: yea, spoken galactic is honestly a struggle to learn,,,

Zedaph: Hey! I can Read galactic very well, yes! ,,,spoken is, a different story however,,, Gem: yea, spoken galactic is honestly a struggle to learn,,,

Scar: what's with X trying to egg Grian into starting the                        another war over there Cleo:,,,Scar

Scar: hmm? Cleo: Scar, last week you said you didn't know any galactic.

Scar: oh, no no, I don't, why?

Zedaph/Gem/Cleo:,,, Scar: ,,, OH! Is that what that language is????

and here's the unused part of the script + my thumbnails! if any place deserved this part of the script, it'd be Tumblr <3

listen listen listen

the thing is

the THING IS

clareyna deserves more traction it really does. i understand we all read the “no demigod will make you whole blah blah blah” bs i get it okay. but the daughter of the roman war god and the greek war god, both their parents have either passively blessed them (reyna) or actively been an asshole to them (clarisse) and they feel they have this impossible standard to live up to as the children of their parents. you’re telling me the ace lesbian and the disaster bi aren’t going to fall in love??? you’re telling me they will never sit down and share a meal together and talk about the pressure they feel in their roles as respective leaders of their camps??? (admittedly reyna does have a larger and more central role + more responsibilities but to say that clarisse isn’t a leader in her own right is to completely ignore the depth of her character but anyway-)

all this is to say that these 2 characters are far too similar to not have an innate understanding of one another. their characterization alone is like. the daughter of the war god who is fierce and strong and tough and shoulders the responsibilities of their camp but on the inside they are just kids who are so tired and want rest but they can never truly have it because they’ll constantly be living in the shadow/expectations of their parents and constantly be viewed as these Strong Women with impenetrable emotional armor. they have both known losses for their camps and fought in the same wars and have lost people they love in one way or another and it’s like. it’s delicious. it’s heartbreaking. it’s what the people (me) deserve.

anyway clareyna is fucking immaculate and if you’re not careful one day i’m gonna write a multi-chapter fic dedicated to them and only them watch yourselves

I love the bit and we’re Morgan just kind of forgets that Alex is an option  and how each and every single time without fail Alex his feelings get hurt

And the fact that I’m pretty sure a good majority of the times that this has happened. It was purely by accident like Morgan just genuinely forgot that Alex was an option. .

I can imagine Reyna working herself to death, like not eating and sleeping properly.

I also believe that if many legionares are too injured to fight, she would fight alone in a different way(like the pirates or something else she picked up)

Imagine if there was a tip to both camps that a massive army if monsters were going to attack Camp Half-blood, so most Romans go to help, leaving Reyna as the only defence( ik they wouldn't but Imagine)

Instead, imagine the army of monsters stormed Camp Jupiter, and Reyna having to hold them off until the legion returns, using magic from Circe's Island and fighting like the pirates.

The legion only returning at the end of the fight in time to see Reyna, broken and bleeding but victorious, having destroyed most of the army and passing out due to injury.

Reyna would then sleep for days, weeks even. Much longer than needed to heal from the fight due to lack of sleep and food. The whole legion in panic that Reyna may not wake up when she's just catching up on missing sleep.

Her just waking up like 3 weeks later confused as everyone is celebrating, not realising how long it's been

Imagine that one scene from that animated series justice league where Batman reveals everyone's secret identity(like a badass) then takes off his cowl and they're all in shocked confusion. I mean that's baby girl Bruce Wayne, sunshine of Gotham as The Dark Knight. Then they all get really protective of him. They might've feared him before but now they know he's just baby. It doesn't matter that he can beat them all, he's baby... Idk I find the idea cute

Okay, so I love that scene dearly, but my heart screams for something more personal? If that makes sense? I'll take inspiration from one of my favorite Spider-Man identity revels.

Let's imagine this; The city, Gotham or Metropolis or just an unlucky piece of land that had a really bad day. Hal saw the building collapse first, coming down on them like an avalanche of death.

Hal isn't very good at brain work; He's not like Flash, who can map out an entire route in his mind in a blink, calculating escape routes, and distances, and lengths, and how fast he can run without injuring anyone.

He's not strategic like Wonder Woman, or pragmatic like Batman, or sensible like Superman. He's not the brainpower; But he's pretty damn good at acting like he's okay.

And withstanding that building because Superman got Injured, well.

He can do so with sweat raining down his temple and pain screaming in his system and a smile on his lips, "This is a really good arm work out, guys,"

" Hang in there, Lantern,"

He hears that you're doing great, Hal just well under his hero moniker from Barry. It's a good power up, if nothing else.

Wonder Woman rubs his shoulders before attending to the injured, helping them dig a way out before the oxygen dries out.

Another thing he's not good at is comforting people; He's lost to crying kids. Especially crying kids whose parents are paste under rubble and hubris.

His back is arching, his fire's going out. All he knows is that those little sniffles and whimpers in the hissing silence hurts worse.

The only person he can think would be worse than him at it is Batman; Stone masked, more shadow than person, a labyrinth of a man.

But Hal isn't paid to think for a reason, because Batman kneels by that kid, and places a fatherly hold on his shoulders, just like Hal's father used to do when he bruised his knees climbing trees.

He doesn't say anything, because there's nothing to say. Words aren't medicine, after all. He's just waiting, it seems like, until the kid speaks first, " My daddy's dead."

"...Yes. I'm sorry."

"But, -- but you were here. You're the justice league! No one dies when you're around! You're supposed to save everybody! So why-- why not him?!"

The weight gets heavier.

" Your father asked us to take care of you first. He protected you."

" You should've left me, then! What am I going to do now? I'm just, -- I'm just...A human."

" So am I."

" No, you're Batman. That's, -- That's not the same. You don't understand. "

Hal's vision is blurry and pained, bordering dangerously close to the deep dark void of unconsciousness, -- but he can't, he can't, God damn it Hal, be useful for once in your entire life, -- but he makes out a shadow moving.

He makes out the shape of Bruce's cowl, an armor, a secret, a mystery with no epilogue. Then he sees pale. Two dots of blue, sparkling from dark grey smudge.

When his vision sharpens, so does the tired face of Bruce Wayne.

"...Oh, holy shit."

" I do, " his voice changes, too, thought that may be just Hal's pumping eardrums playing tricks on him. He goes from grainy and rough to rain soft and porcelain. " I do know. Our pain isn't the same. But the way we can get through it, is. Together."

The kid falls in his arms. For just a moment, it seems like death won when the ring powers out.

"Shazam!"

" Hey guys," Shazam's pretty wheezy for a tank made of beef and godly hands, " Sorry for the hold up. Got stuck in traffic."

They make it out. They use the picture of Wonder Woman carrying him out on her back, and Green Arrow shoves it in his face at the first opportunity.

He doesn't expect them to stick around in the hospital. But he does need to know, " Okay, so, hopefully that wasn't a near death fever dream. But are you Bruce Wayne?"

He asks Batman, and Bruce answers, a tone of shyness not unlikely a new kid introducing himself to the class, " ...Yes. and you're Hal Jordan."

"...Was it the biceps that gave it away?"

He doesn't smile, but Hal doesn't expect him to.

" Well, I mean...I'm in for the long run with you guys," Barry offers them a dorky smile before taking off his mask, too. " My name is Barry Allen. And I'm the fastest man alive...Also a bit of a science nut. I need to see your gadgets, by the way. Your Kevlar durability is just amazing, I mean the way you somehow altered the material,--"

" Oh," Apparently, Batman can blush. It's pretty addictive.

One by one, they follow, all easy smiles, all trust.

" My name is Diana. Princess of Themyscaria. I enjoy ice cream and swords."

" My name is Oliver Queen, and if you want to make a gay joke, don't bother. I said them all and I'm getter at it. And you!" He points directly at Bruce with an arrow, " You're in so much trouble for not telling me about this!"

" You didn't tell me either."

" What kind of detective can't explain the white, blonde, rich, good looking guy apart from Green Arrow? Come on."

Hal has a suspicion Bruce already knew, but said nothing out of courtesy.

" Hal Jordan. I almost broke my spine for you, so, you're welcome for That."

Superman strokes the back of his neck and hunches his shoulders, " I'm, uh, Clark Kent. I'm a journalist for the Daily Planet. I, uh...Make a mean apple pie. Which I could really go for right now."

" Hey, you punched Lex Luthor in the face! Good on you, man."

Diana chuckles, " You'll have to make your famous apple pie for us some time."

" Sure. I like eating with friends."

Hal and Oliver are definetly discussing that blush on Bruce later.

They all turn to Shazam, who's been listening, quiet for once, before he blows a laugh, "Uh, yeah, pass. You guys are nice and all, but I'm more than fine with this. Just me. Good old Shazam."

Crack.

" Is that...Is that a fucking 10 year old?!"

" I'm eleven!"

" What the FUCK,--"

" Don't curse in front of the 9 year old!"

" Again, I am eleven!"

" Who let the 8 year old in!?"

" Wow. Adults really don't listen, huh."

Bruce quite literally shakes on one place, " Are, um, are your parents deceased by chance?" He sounds hopeful about it, too.

" So. A handsome pilot. The fastest dork alive. A badass princess. A good guy who punches hard. A bow and arrow. A weirdo. And a 5 year old. We're quite the group, huh?"

" Again. I'm 11."

" Until you don't bring me some pizza and a bear, you're nothing."

hey if u can’t drive/are a slow learner due to a disability or mental illness, just picture historical figures like pirates or the founding fathers trying to operate a car.

it’s only “easy” bc we’ve normalized it.

fem bruce ideas?

Gosh, it's so hard to like. Translate how a simple gender shift would change a character. Because on one hand I wanna be like, " nothing would be different. Why does it have to be different?"

But on another, sadder hand, it's everything. Everything would be different.

This might be kinda controversial, but I genuinely think fem Bruce would simply know, like Monday follows sunday: she wanted motherhood. That's just something she wanted. Maybe something she excluded from the realm of possibility, discarded in the trash when Batman crawled to life, but it was wanted.

EVERY Robin was wanted. Every single one.

Thomas and Alfred would put bee hairclips in her hair, because she wouldn't brush it otherwise. "The comb feels weird, dads!"

I'm melting at these two calling her "honeybee." Martha loved to let her daughter's pudgy hands paint her face clown white and give her cherry lipstick kisses.

Bryce wears the pearl necklace. Everywhere. It was her mother's favorite gift, from her mother, and many mothers before her. Why does a weak man decide what it means?

Listen. There's beauty, and there's Wayne beauty.

All I'm saying is; Dick learned very quickly to "accidentally" spill his drinks on people at gala. To "faint out of nowhere. Oh gosh, I seem to be struck by illness!"

I think it'd be absolutely adorable if Ollie and Bryce had a casual affection for eachother. Ollie fixes her hair in a braid, in rare moments where it sneaks out of the cowl. He can still recreate Thomas' patterns.

Alfred is the shotgun father but only in a hilarious way. I want him to pull a 47 on Pa Kent and Ra's Al Ghul for trying to adopt his beloved daughter.

Jason is the first batkid who calls her mom. It's hard and difficult and foreign for him. She say he doesn't have to, and he says, " well, you don't leave me much of a choice."

"I'm sorry if you feel forced."

"No, I mean, - that's how I know you are. I could do everything to you and you could do everything to me. We're going to destroy eachother. You'll forgive me for it. How can I not call you mom?"

She packs everyone lunches; Even Justice League members. Especially Clark. Even if he can't string two words together in front of her.

I think she wouldn't get lifts or voice alternators or try to appear more masculine to be intimidating. I simply think she'd be an intimidating woman, and that's it

Harvey never really falls for it.

To him, she's always going to be the girl he married drunk at 18, wasted on tequila and love, and never quite left