I Hate How Much This Made Me Laugh.

Here’s something else I made, Reblog if you are anti maps

Could I request 5 and 19 for Charles and/or Erik? (And could the seat prompt be like, asking to sit on someone’s lap?)

ERIK LEHNSHERR X READER

prompts: “when are you going to quit with the pick-up lines and ask me on a date” and “is this seat free?”

warnings: bad pick up lines and unedited (not actual warnings just be prepared)

-

your relationship with erik was weird.

it was more than known to people that he was an isolated person who didn’t trust easy. even when he met his own son, he was the exact same.

but he never seemed to have that need to be on edge with you. it was always like he had no worries in the world.

not like he would ever admit it, though.

-

“are you a keyboard? because you’re my type.”

erik laughed as you sat down next to him, “you never quit do you?”

“never. also, are you a pack of cards?”

“…no?”

“oh because i’ve pulled out my king.”

“for fucks sa-“

-

and it kept going.

you loved seeing the way he would get ‘aggravated’ at every one of your dumb pick up lines.

“knock knock.”

erik sighed, setting down his book and putting his head in his hands, “who’s there?” he mumbled into his hands.

“when where.”

“when where who?”

“tomorrow, wherever the fuck you want, me and you.”

“the doors over there.” he lifted his head up to point over to the door, making you laugh.

-

it was friday night and charles had arranged a small party for the mansion.

to be honest, it was more of a gathering. just the mutants having a good time for once in their ‘busy’ lives. because it was so undeniably hard living in such a huge mansion.

your eyes settled on the one and only man you ever wanted to see once you walked through the door.

picking up a free drink from the table, you walked over to erik.

“is this seat free?” you asked, pointing to his lap.

he looked down at where you were pointing and looked back up to your eyes, slightly flustered for the ‘majorly serious’ guy.

“is this another one of your pick up lines?” erik groaned.

“nope.”

he was shocked to say the least, “well, it’s always free for you.”

you smiled, trying to fight the light blush that was making its way to your face.

“in that case.” you sat on his lap (this wasn’t as awkward as it sounded i swear).

erik secured his arms around your waist and pulled you flush to him, “when are you going to quit with the pick up lines and ask me on a date?”

you were completely taken aback, “what-“

“do i need to do everything myself?”

“erik, i-“

“are you free tomorrow?”

you took a breath and laughed lightly when you let it out, happily surprised that your dumb lines had made an influence.

“always…for you…” you copied what he said earlier, making him chuckle hoarsely and meet his lips with yours.

you sank into the kiss and it literally felt like a dream.

a dream you didn’t want to wake up from.

-

sorry it’s so late and short i’ve been busy recently 😭

Don’t return ebooks or audiobooks you’ve consumed on Amazon and Audible

Amazon and Audible made it into their policy that you can return ebooks and audiobooks and get a full refund.

They actively promote this, making their book shop into a book lending service, de facto a library you subscribe to. That’s their business plan to encourage subscribtions.

The dirty thing, however, is that Amazon and Audible are making the authors pay for each refunded item. They will detract money, income, royalties, from the authors’ account. They’re not hurting from the refund, the author is.

Look, no-one is saying you’re not allowed to return an item if you’ve read the first 50 pages or listened to the first 45 minutes. Maybe the style is not your thing. Maybe you don’t like the narrator’s voice. Maybe the quality of the writing drops severely after chapter three. Go ahead, if the product is bad, return it.

What I’m talking about is that no one should be able to listen to a ten-hour audiobook or read through nearly an entire novel and still get a refund.

Most of the readers don’t know who’s paying for this business plan. It’s not Amazon and Audible, they’re still keeping your subscription money. It’s the authors.

Spread the word.

quand c’est

instead of killing characters off at random for shock value, may i propose a hip new trend: keeping characters alive at random for shock value. by all logic, this character should be dead. there’s no possible explanation for how they continue to shuffle ‘round this mortal coil. maybe we literally saw them die onscreen back in the passe era of shock value deaths. and yet, there they are. alive before our eyeballs.

50 cliché tropes and prompts

It’s my first prompt list! Thank you to my followers for helping. Credit not needed but please don’t repost. Feel free to link back to the list! These may be cliche but I love them.

There’s people chasing us and I pulled you into the alley with me and wow you’re close

Your shirt/jumper was in the laundry pile and I couldn’t help but steal it

I’m dying and I’m confessing my love for you

Kissing in the rain and getting soaked before running inside laughing

Playing with their hair while their head’s in your lap.

Jolting awake after a nightmare and being comforted

“Good morning, beautiful/handsome”

Hands brushing unexpectedly

There’s only one bed and we sleep as far away as possible from each other but wake up cuddling

You confessed your feelings and we’re about to kiss but we get interrupted

Secret relationship

We dated in high school but then you moved away but now you’re back in town

Both going to grab the same thing and touching hands, then making eye contact.

We’re roommates but we’re falling for each other

Drunkenly confessing feelings

I need a date for this wedding

“I think I’m in love with you.”

Fake dating AU

Blurting out a confession of love

You’re in a coma and I confess all my feelings only for you to wake up

Blind date set up by friends

You’re my new bodyguard and you’re cute.

“Just tell why you did it!” “Because I’m in love with you, okay!”

You’re my ex but I think I still have feelings for you

Wrapping arms around them when they make breakfast

Cuddling in comfortable silence before murmuring “I love you”

Help me I’m being hit on at a bar please be my fake boyfriend for a second

We literally ran into each other

You’re leaving for something dangerous and I can’t help but kiss you

Painting the house that ends in a paint fight and giggles

“You’ve got something on your lip, here let me.”

A soft smile before leaning in for a kiss

Everyone thinks I should stay away from you because you’re dangerous

Spin the bottle

“Do you trust me?”

Friends with benefits and both people catching feelings.

We’re dating and I didn’t know you were a mobster/biker

Everyone thinks we’re already dating, but we’re just best friends- oh wait

Having a bad day and the other noticing

“You saved my life.”

Overhearing they have feelings for you

I’m going to save you from the terrible date you’re having

Taking care of the other when sick or injured

I’m your new neighbour and I got locked out, help!

You took a bullet for me

Argument leading to kissing/sex

“I’ve been in love with you for years.”

I called you at 2am because I need you

You caught me doing something dangerous and flipped out 

I’m scared but won’t admit it so you take my hand 

*oh* Im going to use this.

I think I found my new favorite thing.

strings of fate masterlist

soulmate au – status: finished

pairing: loki x reader

summary: your whole life you’ve been looking for him, your soulmate. but years go by and you loose hope. will you ever find him?

chapters:

- one: strangers

- two: soulmates