Octiainyourpocket - A Deep-frozen Pocket-worm

ADHD brain be like:

TAKE NOTES AND DONT IGNORE! These are crucial if we are going to continue protests

I'm gonna transcribe this last image because I just can't deal with it:

"Why aren't they calling me back? Was It something I said? Do they take this long to respond to everyone? Why was I not named in that list? Why didn't they tag me in that post? Do they not want to be associated with me? Have they worked out I'm a fraud? OMG, has everyone?!"

on self love + care:

1. "I treat myself like I would my daughter. I brush her hair, wash her laundry, tuck her in goodnight. Most importantly, I feed her. I do not punish her. I do not berate her, leave tears staining her face. I do not leave her alone. I know she deserves more. I know I deserve more." (i know i deserve more, michelle k)

2. “Don’t forget to love her. The little girl you used to be. Perhaps She lies within you. Untucked. Sleeping peacefully.” (nurture, kiana llanos)

3. "These days I wake up crying

holding myself in my arms

rocking myself like a mother

repeating

it's all right- i'm here." (rocking, nuela archer)

4. "There’s a little girl in my head & she screams 'unloved! unloved! unloved!' every moment of my life (@star-eaters)

"There’s a woman in my head now & she holds the little girl and says “I will take care of you and we will be alright” when the little girl screams and together they are learning how to trust each other" (@antidecay)

All you people without ADHD drink caffeine in the mornings? Weak ass, I take meth

Seeing this exchange on Reddit was so sad. Men and boys need love and affection as much as women and girls.

one time this nondescript guy came into my dunkin donuts and ordered a small black coffee with blueberry flavor shot, and for some reason that peculiar order stuck with me so much that when, seven months later, i saw him in the parking lot walking towards the door, i quickly made a small black coffee with blueberry flavor shot. he ordered it and i was already holding it. 

i would describe his demeanor that second time as “incredulous”

Hello Mimzy! Two questions. I have a blind character with magical abilities: He can tell if someone is lying or using illusions (he won't see the illusion, just know it's there.) He needs that skill because he is a judge. Am I good here, or is this a dangerous chliche? Since he is an important official, he has aides who also act as his sighted guides (he has a staff, too). In some scenes, the MCs will act as his guides, so I was wondering what do's and don't's exist for writing sighted guides?

On the topic of his magical ability: sounds great

Tips for sighted guides:

1. Always ask and confirm the blind person’s consent. 

When approaching a blind person you’ve just met, say, “Would you like me to act as your sighted guide? Can I help you in any way?” If they say no, then politely step back and accept that they’ve got it from here. If they have trouble and they want your help, they will ask.

With a friend or co-worker, it’s more like this: “If you ever need a sighted guide, I’m available.”

Because sure in an environment you’re comfortable with you won’t need a sighted guide, but if you and a co-worker are going out for lunch, or to some new venue for a work thing, then knowing they are open to acting as a sighted guide makes it a lot easier to ask for help.

“Could you guide me?”

“Yeah, sure.”

2. How to begin guiding and proper form.

The sighted person will offer their elbow to the blind person. Some people have a preference to which hand they use to hold onto someone’s elbow. I personally to hold on with my left hand to their right elbow, because fifty percent of the time I’m using my cane in my right hand too. If someone has a strong preference for which hand they’d like to hold onto with, they will hold out that hand.

Example when I’m with friends:

I hold out my left hand in their direction. “K, could you guide me?”

He walks up to my left side and it’s easy for me to slip my fingers around the crook of his elbow.

Some blind people prefer to hold onto the back of the elbow and walk a step behind their guide. Personally I prefer to walk side by side, and not because it’s better or easier but because that’s what I got used to when I first started experiencing severe day blindness and before I started watching Molly Burke’s videos. She instructs people to follow the method of letting the blind person hold onto the back of your elbow and walk a step behind.

There are some benefits to doing it her way. If you are a step behind, you know when there is a step up or down because the elbow you’re holding onto is moving a few inches up or down as the guide steps down.

I never learned to do this, I am terrible at change, and this benefit rarely applies because my guides always tell me when we’re approaching a step.

3. Things I like my sighted guides to do

-tell me when we’re about to step up or down and allow me to take the stairs at my own pace. This sometimes means letting go of them and holding onto the rail while I feel my way up with my feet and shoes.

-tell me when we’re stopping to cross the street and when it’s clear and we will cross

-when standing at a cross walk, I like to place the tip of my cane a step ahead of my guide because drivers will see it and realize one person in this duo is blind and to exercise caution.

(It took my mum years to realize I did this on purpose and finally ask me about it, and I always do it at cross walks, even when she’s not my guide)

-Inform me of upcoming obstacles in my path and move so that I have enough room to walk around that obstacle

-Drop casual details of things in the environment that I can’t see, like a building with cool architecture, or pride flags, or an animal on the sidewalk, or if a garden is nice, or if someone on the street is doing performing. These are all things that interest me personally. If your character doesn’t care about architecture, there’s little point in their guides mentioning it. So consider your characters interests and if something might pop up in their environment

4. Never ever do this when acting as a sighted guide

-Never touch their cane! Ever. Don’t kick it, don’t nudge it. Even if you think, “fuck it’s going to hit something and get damaged.” I don’t care. You might as well have kicked me in the face. I want my cane to find everything dangerous for me, that’s why I have it, and any disruption to what it’s doing is annoying and distracting. And canes are durable and we know how to take care of them.

If you must prevent our cane from touching something dangerous or fragile, then inform us verbally.

-Do not jerk them in some direction without a verbal explanation. It undermines the very precious trust we are putting in your hands to safely guide us and respect us as people.

-Do not speak for them. Unless they express to you that they have anxiety that stops them from advocating for themselves sometimes and they want you to step in if it’s obvious their rights are being violated or they’re being harassed and too afraid or stunned to say anything. And if they give you that permission and then later revoke it, you must respect it. If they give you that permission but are clearly going to advocate for themselves this time, then do not speak over them.

-Do not just leave them somewhere and walk away. If you must walk away, tell them where you’re going, regardless of whether it is to the bathroom, to throw something away in the trashcan across the room, or if you need to leave the even. Do not just leave them with someone else and assume that’s okay for all parties involved. You’ve just told the blind person you can’t be trusted to stick around if they need you.

What being a sighted guide means and What I am telling you when I ask you to be a guide:

I am in a position where my safety depends on having a sighted guide with me. Please stay with me. I am showing you a lot of trust by asking for this in the first place. Treat me like a person capable of making my own decisions, I am not helpless, this environment just did not consider blind people during its construction and planning and is inaccessible to me. If this place or event was accessible then I would not need a guide, but here we are. I am not helpless.

That is all I can think of at this hour, but anon, I greatly appreciate you asking how to write a good sighted guide because this is something I rarely touch on but a post that benefits both writers and any person interacting with a blind person in real life.