Do You Ever Eat Popcorn Out Of The Palm Of Your Own Hand With Such Ardent Desperation That You Feel Like

“I want to speak to a manager,” the middle-aged woman said in her stern I-used-to-be-a-soccer-mom-ten-years-ago voice, looking down at me over the top of her Gucci reading glasses.

A wicked grin split across my face and the gates of Hell opened up behind me, releasing a gust of hot wind that whipped my apron around my body and forced the woman to shield her face. Demons came forth, dancing around in flames with songs of, “She wants to speak to a manager. Did you hear that? She wants to speak to a manager!” before erupting into earsplitting shrieks of laughter, none louder than my own cackling.

I took in the woman’s look of utter horror before my eyes rolled back into my head and I growled,

“I am the manager.”

I want a relationship that’s just like super cool friendship with like kissing

Tumblr needs more of this….whatever this is.

reblog if your name isn't Amanda.

2,121,566 people are not Amanda and counting!

We’ll find you Amanda.

i was supposed to go to bed an hour ago dont tell my mom

Remember when they were going to censor the internet?

take me to art museums and make out with me

Go big or go home 

christmas eve what about christmas adam