jeanette-luminia

Latest Posts by jeanette-luminia

YOU DID THIS FOR WHAT??? WHILE I WAS LISTENING TO PARTY 4 YOU BY CHARLI XCX????

so this one post right, which OW...

but also i watched X2 yesterday, this hurts even more with context but also feeds into deadclaws so !??!?

tldr OUGH HE STICKS AROUND...

(edit by @wadewilsonhowlett heart emoji <3)

𝐇𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬, "𝑩𝒂𝒃𝒆, 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒔𝒐 𝒄𝒐𝒐𝒍." || 𝑩𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒚 𝑩𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒆𝒔

Synopsis: When Bucky heard your voice for the very first time on stage, everything became quiet. The mumbling screams echoed through his ears, but he didn’t pay attention to any of them—he only paid attention to you. Your voice. You stood in front, at the center, taking all the attention away from him being the Winter Soldier. No one batted an eye at whoever he was. All eyes were on you.

His eyes were on you.

Song Recommendation: Robbers by The 1975

Warnings: Bucky Barnes (He's a warning, alright), fluff, self-deprecating thoughts, a smidge of angst if you squint.

A/N: I have come back from the dead! It's been like... 2 years now? I've been busy with school for the past 2 years and now I'm back! kind of. I'm not sure if I will be writing regularly but I am very active on my other blog @luminialib which is my fic rec blogs where I just reblog a lot of fanfictions I read here. Enjoy!

P.S - This may be inaccurate, and I do apologize. I work on my limited knowledge.

When Bucky heard your voice for the very first time on stage, the world became quiet. The mumbling screams echoed through his ears, but he didn’t pay attention to any of them — he only paid attention to you. Your voice. Something in him snapped, like a piece of thread tied down to something heavy, something pressuring, something too deep, and he let loose. His heart stuttered from the way your voice wrapped itself around the air like silk and smoke, soft and devastating, like it knew every scar buried inside him. You stood in front, at the center, taking all the attention away from him being the Winter Soldier. No one batted an eye at whoever he was. All eyes were on you.

His eyes were on you.

Earlier that day, Natasha had entered the compound with a smile as the three men, who were sitting on the couch, now grew curious. She had snagged some concert tickets downtown from a singer he can’t seem to remember.

“Come on. The others are out, so I have enough for the four of us.” She grinned as she waved the ticket like money.

Sam, like the lightbulb on the top of his head flickered, perked up. “God, is that who I think it is?”

“Who?” Steve asked.

“Yes, it is.” 

Sam practically leaped off from his seat before confirming the concert ticket. “We have to go.”

Steve, still confused, asked another question. “Who are we seeing?”

“Remember the singer I recommended to you and Bucky before?” Steve nodded, seemingly following along, remembering the singer. “They are currently holding a concert. I remember seeing that on their socials but forgot about it."

Nat smirked, seemingly proud of herself. “Well, I snagged us a ticket, and their concert is tonight. So… what do you say?”

Steve thought about it for a moment before smiling. He closed the book he was reading and looked at them. “Why not. We have nothing planned. They’re a good singer too.”

Sam beamed at him, then said, “Right?”

A certain super soldier, however, did not want to come. A concert means a crowd. And a crowd means a high chance for someone to recognize them, especially him. While he was pardoned by the government, the people never forgot his mistakes, the death, and the blood on his hands. They never forget. And they never failed to remind him. In each corner he goes, whether it is in Brooklyn or New York, there are stares following him. Daggers pierce his body, not deep enough, but enough for him to feel the blood trickling down the wound. Even if he had saved a person, made amends, or become a US citizen, the people never forget. To them, he was, and always will be, the Winter Soldier.

So no, he did not want to come. “You guys go ahead. I’d rather stay inside.”

“Bucky,” Natasha started. “You’re coming.”

“No.”

“Come on, Buck. It’s a good opportunity for you to have a new environment,” Steve reasoned. What he said was the truth. He hasn’t left the compound for at least a month now. The only time he left the compound was for a mission, but those don’t count. He grumbled something under his breath as they stared at him.

Sam sighed. “You have nothing better to do; you might as well come.”

“I have better things to do.”

Sam laughed, “Oh yeah? Like what, being grumpy all night?”

He, once again, grumbled under his breath. It’s not like he doesn’t want to hang out with them; he just doesn’t know how to be… fun anymore. It wasn’t like before — before the fall, before HYDRA, before everything. He has long forgotten how to be a good company, a good friend. He tries. He desperately tries to be like before. But no matter how hard he tries, he is reminded of who he once was. They argued for a moment, but Natasha left no room for him to deny the invitation. Additionally, Sam and Steve inevitably helped Natasha to convince him to join them as well, wanting him to have a different environment for once aside from the corners of the compound. Bucky, exasperated, but there was no room for arguments. Maybe he was due to see the outside world for once. Maybe… it's okay.

So, reluctantly, he agrees. “Fine.” He stood up from his side of the couch. “Only because you’re forcing me to.”

“Oh, come on, you’ll love it,” Sam said with confidence. “I have great music taste.”

The cold breeze blew around as the audience was buzzing with excitement. The crowd was smaller than he thought; the venue wasn’t that big but big enough for maybe a thousand audience members to be in. He was surprised how close they were to the stage, seeing all the action. He had forgotten that he had super hearing (no thanks to the super soldier serum) and with all the blaring lights, speakers, and screams of the audience, he began rethinking his choices and why he tagged along. Maybe he should have convinced the three of them to let him stay at the compound, where it was quiet, safe, secure, and isolating. 

Before he could grasp anything else, the concert had begun.

Spotlights shined, moving rapidly to the audience before pointing at the center of the stage. Smoke emerged from each side of the stage, then the band slowly appeared behind the smoke, making an entrance of themselves. Before he knew it, a sweet melodic voice wrapped itself through the air of the people. The audience screamed in awe as, slowly, you appeared behind the fog, electric guitar in hand and a mic in the other. 

And just like that, he was never the same. Your smile filled the audience with glee, screaming on top of their lungs as you hung your guitar around your shoulder. You had welcomed your audience in this concert, thanking them for showing up, yet he didn’t move — all he did was stare at you. He wasn’t sure what he was seeing, but it felt like you were an angel. Maybe it was all the light behind you, or the fog machine spewing out smoke, or the fact that your voice wrapped him in an embrace. He was entranced with your voice, the way it was freely, utterly, astonishingly woven. You were like a siren — casting a spell he can’t break; cannot, won’t– whatever it is, he was enchanted. James Buchanan Barnes was, and now is, utterly hopeless.

You made him hopeless.

He watches, observes, or whatever you want to call it. He watched as your fingers strummed the guitar you wielded, as if it were your soul. He could tell that each beat felt as if you bled for it, broke for it, and healed, only to break harder. Each yearned for something more — something to have. In a moment, he wanted to memorize each beat, each strum of strings, each time you managed to put him in a trance. It wasn’t the guitar, or the song, but you. It felt like each strum kept you from falling apart completely. Lights flickered across your skin — each color complimented the aura you emit.

Finishing the song you are currently playing, he hadn’t realized that it was nearly ending. Your concert was nearly ending. He didn’t want to end. He wants you to keep going — to keep singing until each word snaps his already disoriented reality.

You take a breath, exhaustion evident from the sweat building up on your forehead. Yet, despite it, you manage to smile so widely, so genuinely, that he is in awe. You announced your final song as the crowd went wild before picking up your guitar once again.

He hears the buildup, the subtle beat of the drums before you entered with your solo. It started slow, like words slowly being unraveled. It felt familiar, almost nostalgic, yet dangerous, hurt, missing the pain.

She had a face straight out a magazine God only knows, but you'll never leave her Her balaclava is starting to chafe

It sent shivers down his spine. He has been on many missions, as the Winter Soldier and as Bucky Barnes — but this was the first time in a while that he had this kind of feeling. Excitement. 

And when she gets his gun, he's begging, "Babe, stay, stay Stay, stay, stay."

For a moment, you locked eyes with Bucky. A small millisecond. But still, in that moment, he belonged to your voice. Completely. He was latched, entangled by you, and you didn’t even know.

"I'll give you one more time We'll give you one more fight Said one more line Will I know you?"

He watched you, holding yourself like a storm whose singing kept you from falling, breaking apart. He felt like he didn’t belong in a moment, that was not meant for anyone else to hear, but he couldn’t look away. Couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t do anything except stand there, a prisoner to your gravity.

Now if you never shoot, you'll never know And if you never eat, you'll never grow You got a pretty kind of dirty face And when she's leaving your home, she's begging you to stay, stay Stay, stay, stay

Each emphasis, somehow, struck deep inside him. A calling. It made him more alive. He felt his heart stutter beneath his chest. It was aching for you.

"I'll give you one more time We'll give you one more fight Said one more line There'll be a riot 'cause I know you"

He wanted to cry, scream, or do anything that would get your attention. Yet he was stuck, unmoving, mesmerized. While he hears Sam in the background screaming for you, he only manages to watch.

Well, now that you've got your gun It's much harder now the police have come And I'll shoot him if it's what you ask

There was a switch. A subtle thing he caught on as he watched. There was something in you that changed completely; it became more… you. Like it was digging from your roots, your past. There was a shake in your breath before you continued.

But if you just take off your mask You'd find out everything's gone

You paused, looking up to be greeted by the sea of crowds.

Wrong

Then, he catches it. Your glance, the stare you gave him, and the smile — oh, the smile you gave him. The way your lips curled as he met your gaze.

Now everybody's dead And they're driving past my old school

Your voice's jolt slammed through his nerves. When he stared at your eyes, he swore that you weren’t just simply singing — you were bleeding it, straight from your chest, raw and exposed. Every bit of emotion burst, leaving him stranded, anchored in his place, forced to stare yet refuse to move.

And he's got his gun And he's got his suit on And she says, "Babe, you look so cool”

You had him. Completely. Entirely. It was useless. You had him wrapped around your fingers, and you don’t even know it. Maybe you did — maybe you saw his stare, the way he looked at you. Maybe there was a part of you that played harder for him. Only him. He was, incredibly and utterly, helpless. Every goddamn note. Every flick of your wrist. Every breath between verses. Everything.

"Babe, you look so cool," he muttered under his breath. He thanked the noise, the cheers between yelling that no one heard him. Not even Steve heard him. It was like his secret. A sacred moment he will keep to himself, a fleeting fragment of honesty tucked between the pulse of the music and the rise of his heartbeat.

In a brief moment, your eyes met, once again. But only this time, you stared at him for what seemed like a long time. He let it happen. He stared back, softer, more gentle. In that moment, everything went quiet. It was like you two were the only ones left in the venue. He didn’t know what this was. A new profound obsession? Reverence? Something between his broken mind and soul? Maybe love?

But he knew, as his heart dropped in the pit of his stomach, that whatever you are doing to him, this feeling? Wasn’t leaving so soon. Not tonight. Not ever.

© 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐀 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my work.

A/N: Haven't written anything for 3 months(?) now, so this is very scrappy :)

If you were a second late, he wouldn’t be here now—sitting in front of you as you frantically try to bandage the best you can with limited resources. He sees your worry, your tears forming in the corner of your eyes, your trembling hands, and the way your lips quiver. He sees it—yet doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t dare to say anything in this state, it was his fault anyway. He can live that up.

He tried to reach for you, but the severe burn on his arm didn’t help. Each second, it felt like he was still burning from the fire that the curse made. Nonetheless, he reached for your wrist.

“Dear…”

No. You can’t stop now, he has to live, he has to. Everyone needs him, Yuuji needs him, Gojo needs him, You need him. 

You ignore his voice, focusing on amplifying your reverse technique on him. “No, shut up.”

“Sensei…” You averted your attention away from Nanami for a moment and focused on the two students before you. It shows that you weren’t keeping your act together, regarding the concerned faces they gave you. But, you smiled. There was nothing else to reassure them in this chaos.

“Go to Shoko, both of you.”

“But–” Before Nobara protested, you cut her off.

“That is an order. You need proper treatment.” Your glare gave them goosebumps, thus, they had no other choice but to obey. “...Okay, but be careful, Nanamin, Sensei.”

Be careful.

“We will.”

If only that was the case. You hoped this was just a huge nightmare—and that once you woke up, it would be your day off, laying in bed till noon with him, or maybe even going on a date. Maybe, maybe, maybe—

These emotions appeared slow and controlled. Then suddenly, you find yourself in the eye of the whirlpool, consuming all at once. Your breath becomes rigid, the tears in your eyes start to fall, and you cannot control your curse energy at the moment. Everything felt so hazy. Your throat began to close off, and you felt like someone had your nose clogged as you couldn’t breathe properly, and you couldn’t see anything with all the tears falling.

Then suddenly, you were hit with the realization. If you were a second late, the man you desperately love will be gone right before your eyes.

…athe

Bre—

“Darling, look at me.” you felt the ringing in your head, yet his voice was heard. As you looked at him, even with how bruised he was, he still carried that… expression in him. That soft expression as if—as if he wasn’t about to die.

You covered your face. “You’re being unfair.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I hate you. You were supposed to ask for help if it’s too much, but you didn’t.” you gasped for air, feeling your heart breaking every second as you spoke. “You could have yelled like Yuuji did. I could have been there for you. I could have fought alongside you. You wouldn’t have suffered this much.”

Nanami leaned against the wall but never left his eyes on your figure as you cried your heart out. He allows you to. Because if it was you in this situation, he would have done the same.

“You promised you’d stay alive. Yet you nearly died if I was a second late!” 

Nanami, who was quick to grab your wrist, pulled you onto his chest. “S-stop! Let go. It’s painful!”

Hearing your words, he only strengthened his grip. “It’s not as painful as you crying knowing I can’t do anything.” This pain he can tolerate. Yet somehow, he can never tolerate your anguished cry, knowing he was the cause of it. He can’t do anything about it, because what is done, is done.

He can only do now to hold his dear beloved, hoping to tell you that he is alive. He survived—thanks to you. 

Nanami Kento then realized that he would rather be selfish than live in a world where you aren’t here anymore.

© 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐀 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my work.

to everyone! this is me! I'm gonna be offline on this account to focus on my studies.

𝑻𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔...

╰➤ I hope this finds you well ◞ ꙳ ๋࣭ ⭑ `

I. ABOUT

Hello! My name is Blu, I'm 15 years old—turning 16 this September. You might know me from studytwt months ago. I stopped posting and migrated here! I'm a newly senior-year student taking the HUMSS strand for future Psychology. I occasionally post my studies, and channel my inner food blogger in the time of need. (Everyday)

II. PLANS & GOALS

I plan to pass all my subjects with ease. With a new school this year, I would also love to be welcomed by my classmates. As any student would, my goal is to graduate with honors (maybe high honors too) and with other awards I may get.

III. STATUS & MORE INFO

Active status: Online

Currently Watching: N/A

Current Reads: N/A

Playing: Minecraft (add me! luvistrd)

I am a Virgo sun, Aries moon, and rising Libra! I like to procrastinate till I fear sleeping and wake up with anxiety– kidding! (not really) I like to watch K-drama, anime, and I like to read books, novels, manga, and manhwa/manhua. Although I haven't read nor watched that much, I would appreciate recommendations from you!

I'm not trying to be photogenic or have an aesthetic setup; as long as I can be realistic within my studies and through you and study as much as I can, I'm fine.

P.S!! I took the first and third photos! 📍Location: Lucky Chinatown. Binondo, Manila.

𝑩𝒆𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒊𝒇𝒖𝒍? 𝑵𝒐.

He wanted to say that you’re beautiful. But he can’t. He simply can’t. Because the word beautiful doesn’t describe what you are right now. It doesn’t justify how you look, the way you smile, your eyes, lips, nose, body, figure—nothing can justify the way you look.

Nanami was the kind of man that had words to say. He was rarely speechless. He can be blunt, honest, and criticizing, yet he spoke nothing about you. No words made by man can satisfy him. He can compliment you, but to him—it wasn’t enough. You were someone blessed with looks.

It was as if you were a painting in the art museum, and he was a visitor. You were far more from the word perfection. It was inconceivable that a human being would be blessed with such looks. A pair of eyes are like the sacred gem that holds every secret in this world. Every feature of you was unfathomable perfection, from head to toe, inside and outside.

He wonders how he manages to get a grasp on you, how he manages to be well entangled in your soul.

If someone saw those features and did not get drawn immediately by them, then something is wrong with that person. Because even he, a man who is known to show little to no emotions, was enchanted by you.

You were an unexpected surprise, a moment he had yet to plan. A collision of stars hit him unimaginably and his life was never the same as before. He never expected to be you, you know? But it’s you, always have been, always will be. It was never like that. Now he was bound by you. He promises to never let go.

© 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐀 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my work.

HALA KA. FILIPINO KA???

bat🤸malungkot🤸ang🤸beshy🤸ko 🤸

Satoru: kasi masaya na yung ex ko.

dapat ako lang kasi masaya 🙃

NAUUUURRRR IM CRYING NONNIE 😭 (it's a filipino tiktok meme)

SEE??? THIS IS WHY I'M IN LOVE WITH HIM. I have never replaced him with other men.

A friendly reminder:

No need to simp for Toji - we've had a good man in front of our noses the entire time

I got lost in the Larissa Weems fandom since everything I saw was smut and smut. it's like the only genre is smut. I barely see fluff, angst, or hurt/comfort fics from her to the point I lost interest in writing for her.

There should be a balance between genres, not just smut.

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞? || 𝑵𝑨𝑵𝑨𝑴𝑰 𝑲𝑬𝑵𝑻𝑶

Synopsis: You smiled and said, “Love is…” you paused, looking up to the moon, then to his eyes. “The person you want to be human with.” You smiled. “That’s how I viewed it though.”

Prompt: Love is... the person you want to be human with.

A/N: I have been unmotivated for the past few days so I browsed through my writing inspo on ig and found this post by @artbyastronoht and it made me think of Nanami. No use of Y/N.

The simple, bare minimum thing makes love humane.

“What is love?”

It was a stupid question, He thought. Everyone knows what love is. Love is something deeper than everything. Love is something that you’d sacrifice to get it. It was something more that people cannot explain in words alone. They express it in different ways that feel almost normal—yet it has different meanings.

He doesn’t know why.

He doesn’t know how to approach this topic to anyone, so he kept it. Years have passed, and many have professed their love to him—yet he didn’t feel indifferent to it. Entering a relationship, in hopes that he’d understand what it means; what love means.

He stopped looking for it. It was a waste of time. In this society, money is the only thing you need to survive, love is just a benefit of it. So, he decided to forget about it. He spends his time working, earning money to live. He wakes up, eats, works, and sleeps. The cycle continues for years.

But, whenever he sees a couple, high school sweethearts, or a family passing by—something in him provokes him. The question he long asked himself lingered again. What is love?

The work was shit. Being a Jujutsu sorcerer is shit. Die with regret, and there is a chance that you can become a curse. Being a sorcerer does not benefit anyone. You die with your comrades, you get hurt on a mission, you fail to save people, and you’ll feel like your youth is robbed.

But, the more he thought about it, the more he saved innocent people, it allowed him to build up small bits of appreciation from innocent people. It was enough to die without regrets.

So he came back.

And there you were. As if you’d been waiting for him this entire time. He’s happy to see you, always has been. You’re still the kind person he knew. You were still the same person all those years ago. You greeted him with a smile—You weren’t mad that he left the Jujutsu world. If anything, you understand him more than anyone.

That's what he loves about you—

Love?

Is this love?

It felt different from all the love he has received. It felt warm and right. It felt like love. It radiates between them. The aura was seen in others' eyes. Yet he wasn’t sure if it was love, maybe it was his thoughts messing with him. He’s been deprived of the thought of love that he thinks that this feeling is love.

You can see something bothering him. He was a reserved man, but this is something you can’t shake off. You asked him what was bothering him.

Naturally, he was surprised. People around him couldn’t see if something was bothering him. Or if he’s having trouble over something. Though some do notice, they usually brush it off. Nanami is a reliable guy, he’s smart. He Can figure it out on his own. He knows everything, he can do it.

It was always “He can do it” but never “Let me help you.”

For him, it was weird. He wasn’t used to it. The care, the way you notice him. It made his heart leap. This feeling is new to him, he was 24 for god sake. Feelings shouldn’t be a problem for him. It shouldn’t bother him, especially now he has returned to become a Jujutsu sorcerer.

The more he stayed silent, you just stayed by his side. Waiting patiently for an answer that may satisfy both of you. You heard him sigh, and he looked up and stared at the moon that shines above. 

He finally said it. “What is love?”

Saying it felt a sort of relief, yet nervousness. Are you gonna laugh at him? It was all unfamiliar to him. He wasn’t the one to be desperate, but he was getting impatient at this point. Soft breaths filled the air of November, soft dim light from the lamp post. Autumn has been getting chilly, it was the evidence of winter once again.

He heard a soft hum, then he turned around to look at you. He stared at you for a while, he stared as you thought of an answer. He can hear the thud of his heart, his nose was starting to flare with pink, along with his ear. He was embarrassed. Rightfully so, he thinks.

You fluttered your eyes open, feeling the cold wind hit you.

You smiled and said, “Love is…” you paused, looking up to the moon, then to his eyes. And he swears something happened. Something definitely happened. His heart couldn’t stop beating. There was a lump in his throat. In this cold November, his hands begin to sweat. This wasn’t him.  What is this feeling?

“The person you want to be human with.” You smiled. “That’s how I viewed it though.”

To be human with. Was it that simple? He wasn’t disappointed by your answer. He was more surprised that he didn’t even give it a thought. To be human is to do mundane routines. Groceries every Sunday. Baking pastries with your beloved. Embracing them in bed. Waking up in their arms. Coming home with your other person, hugging them, and exchanging “I'm home” and Welcome home.” The I love yous every time you’ll leave the house. Cooking each other food. Taking care of each other when one of you is sick. Sleeping in on weekends because both of you miss each other. Enjoying each other’s company.

To be human is to embrace the emotion inside you. Being happy when little things happen. Getting upset over small yet significant things. The feel of anger bubbling inside you. The way jealousy feels. Whenever you felt your heart drop. Feeling every significant feeling that a person can feel. Joy, sadness, love, hate, envy, lust, jealousy; and much more.

That is what it means to be human. The simple, bare minimum thing makes love humane.

All of the things he feels, it was love towards you. It was the love he wants to experience with you. He wants to experience things he hasn’t experienced with you by his side. He wants to be with you.

All the things he have been feeling when you were around, was love. It all makes sense. He wants to spend his lifetime with you. That was love. This is love.

© 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐀 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my work.

A/N: A Short Drabble based on I've Got a Crush on You (And I like-)!

Satoru looked at you, then at Nanami. Then again. And again. And again for the fifth time. You can tell that Kento was getting agitated by his antics. “Can you stop this, Gojo?”

Satoru stood straight up, closed his eyes, and put his finger on his chin—as if he was thinking. Ieiri and Suguru are in the background, laughing at the whole situation. “How come you didn’t know?” Ieiri snickered.

Then, Satoru turned and pointed at her, “How come you never told me when I talked to you? You witch!”

Shoko only gave a smug face. “You could have asked us.” Suguru butted in.

“Why not help me earlier?!”

They bickered in the background as you watched their antics. You occasionally laughed at the sight while your cousin watched you.

“Seriously, what do you see in him?” Kento muttered under his breath. You just laughed at him—okay maybe not him. Yes, your boyfriend teases everyone a lot, energetic, stubborn, a man-child, and a huge flirt—but there is something beyond that act of his, something vulnerable and kind.

And you want to see every part of him.

“Sure, he’s a bit too much. But, I like him that way.”

Kento can see the way you love him. The way your eyes shine whenever you see him. Your eyes go big whenever he comes back from a mission. The way he has his infinity off whenever with you, at all times. The way you have heart eyes when you stare at him.

He sees the way his upperclassman looks at you too. It was the look of love.

He sighed for the final time, but this time—with a smile on his face.

“Okay. But I'll kick his ass if he hurt you.”

You giggled, “Okay.”

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐟... || 𝐆𝐨𝐣𝐨 𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮 + 𝐍𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢 𝐊𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐨

Warning: Shibuya Arc Spoilers, Recent Manga Spoilers, heavy(?) angst, major death???

A/N: I heard "Scott Street" by Phoebe Bridgers from my sister's phone, and suddenly, it sparked something in me. I had to write angst. wrote this in one sitting today so it is not proofread!!

𝐍𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢 𝐊𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐨

What if It was you instead of him who died by Mahito?

No. It was supposed to be him, not you. It shouldn’t be you. You stood in front of Mahito as his hand stretched into your chest. You were unresponsive, and he couldn’t move. He can’t bring himself to take a step. Take a step. Move. they’ll die. 

Nothing. He studies your beat-up feature. Blood is trickling down your left hand as your right has been cut off. He notices your heavy breathing, yet no emotion can be seen in you. You stand in a pool of blood and multiple dead curses. Is this it? No. God, please don’t. You and Kento have been planning your wedding for months. Both of you were excited about the wedding, dreaming of the day that would come when he proposed to you. This shouldn’t end here.

Are you scared? It’s okay to be scared. I get scared too. But with you, I’m less scared. So– you can trust me. If you’re scared, run to him—He’ll make sure he’ll protect you. So, come to him, run to him. Please. He’ll promise to get you out of this hell hole alive—together. 

“Y/N…” He sounds pathetic. His lips are trembling, tears threatening to leave his eyes. His grip was lost, trembling at the sight.

Then, you turned to him. He is a man who understands many things. He understands things easily. But this. His strained voice only manages to utter a single word. Why?

Why are you not scared? Why are you just standing there? Why aren’t you doing anything? Why are you smiling at him? Why? Why so suddenly? Why now? Why does it have to be you? Why are you smiling in the face of death? Stop it. Don’t smile. Run to him. You can rest. Rest with him.

Go to Malaysia with him. Live with him. You both planned to live in Malaysia after this. He suggested Kautan. Building a house on a secluded beach. Wake up early in the morning and stroll around the shore as the sun come up. Reading those book that has been collecting dust on the shelf. Cooking together, maybe even baking. Maybe in the holidays, you’d invite Yuuji and the others, even if he doesn’t want to.

Then maybe, if you want to, start a family. Maybe two kids, a girl, and a boy. Then, maybe adopt a dog—or a cat. He would love to see them grow up. Have their own lives, and not following the path you and Kento took. 

The voice of Yuuji made him realize that this was the cruel reality he’s gonna live in, from now on. A life that isn’t worth living. He watched as you send him your final smile. Closing your eyes as you accepted your faith. He saw the tears. The tears you desperately hide. They flow without him wiping them away.

“Don’t be a stranger.”

Why does it have you? He wants you back. He doesn’t want to live in a cruel world where you aren’t here. It was simply worth living anymore.

𝐆𝐨𝐣𝐨 𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮

What if It was you Instead of Megumi who was taken by Sukuna?

He thought that after he left the prison realm, you were the first one to greet him. He thought that you’d be running into his arms, crying in his shirt, and punching him slightly for leaving you alone. He thought that you’d be smiling, saying “Welcome Back, Satoru.”

He thought that… you’d be safe.

He only then realizes the twisted and cruel reality he lives in as he teleported to where Kenjaku is, he saw you beside him. His six eyes already told him that Sukuna is possessing your body—but he didn’t want to believe it.

You were dressed in a robe that you never wore before. Your hair wasn’t in the style he is used to. Your nails suddenly have gotten sharper. Your eyes were now different. It wasn’t the same eyes that he grow to love. It wasn’t the same eyes that he love to stare at. It wasn’t the same. You weren’t there anymore. Behind those eyes, he can’t see a glimpse of you. 

He pretended that he wasn’t affected by it. I didn’t care about them. It was a bitter lie that he want to throw up. Why did this happen?

He came back. He couldn’t stay looking at you— at least not right now.

Shoko, Ijichi, and Utahime stared at him as he sat on the hospital bed. They couldn’t help but sympathize with him, especially Shoko. He looks lost, almost as if he has hit rock bottom.

“...Why.”

None of them know why. But they knew you didn't deserve it. It shouldn’t be you. It was unfair to everyone. To him. To you. 

The day that Satoru has to fight you– Sukuna, he pushed the thought away. This isn’t you right now. It’s Sukuna. He can save you. Of course, he can. He is the strongest anyway. Right?

Right?

Fighting you was hard, his emotions keep bubbling to the surface. He kept reminding himself that it wasn’t you. His sweet Y/N isn’t here right now, only Sukuna—

Just before he can make another Domain, he notices a stop in Sukuna. Sukuna gripped his head, groaning. As if he’s losing control. Immense curse energy leaked out. Suddenly, shadows appeared out of nowhere. Those shadows turned into hands and manage to cease Sukuna from moving.

“God damn it, Woman!”

He perked up. “Y/N?”

Then, another shadow appeared on Sukuna’s back. His eyes widen as he watched you appear in the shadow. He sees how exhausted you are. You are pushing your limit too much. He wished he wasn’t trapped in that stupid prison realm.

“I told you, didn’t I? I won’t let you win.”

“You aren’t strong enough.”

You turned to Satoru. And you smiled. Why? What are you planning? Why are you smiling? This isn’t good. He should do something—anything. What are you doing?

“Don’t be a stranger.”

Light overcomes his vision. Once he opened his vision. You weren’t there anymore. Sukuna wasn’t there anymore. No one was in front of him anymore but cherry blossom petals fell from the sky in the middle of November. 

His heart hurts. why?

© 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐀 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my work.

Am I supposed to write my scenario when someone else hasn't written it?!

Hehehe, originally I thought about making her into nanami's sister, but gojo's not stupid, he would have known. ◜◡◝

repost cuz I accidentally posted it on my other blog. TwT

𝐈 𝐆𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐂𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡 𝐨𝐧 𝐘𝐨𝐮 (𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮-) || 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔

Summary: He doesn't know about love. He gets these weird feelings whenever you're around him. And seeing you with Nanami together irks him. So, he went to his trusted friend, Shoko to see what's sickness he have gotten from you.

prompt: "I got a crush on you. And I like you. I like-" call abruptly ends

A/N: I had this idea since last year😭 And now I decided to write it again because of JJK season two! I don't know if I'm gonna write regularly. I'll throw some poems here and there, some blurbs. Since it's summer, maybe I'll write more.

Gojo wasn’t the type of person to be vulnerable. He does not like intimacy. He does not like the idea of being in a relationship, especially with his status in the Jujutsu world. He has a gift. A gift that can also bring a curse onto his life. He was the strongest out of everyone. No one can touch him. No one can hurt him.

Or so he thought. Gojo doesn’t understand this feeling—and it infuriates him. It was like punching him in the guts. He doesn’t understand the sudden heat that always appears on his face. The feeling like you’re gonna get a heart attack. When you feel your legs give out. He doesn’t understand anything; he wants to—but he’s afraid to come to you.

Because you were the cause of it. You.

You were a year older than him—the only second year in Jujutsu tech at that time when he was a first year. The first thing he noticed about you was your face. Your face is almost like silk, stern yet radiates kindness—warmth. It glows under the sun and moonlight. Then, you’re elegant. You walk elegantly, act elegantly, and talk elegantly; everything about you is elegant. It frustrates him. He cannot come up with a single word to describe you poorly, to tease you with, because in his six eyes—you were already perfect. 

You seemingly have been oblivious to the special treatment he gives you, yet others noticed. He wasn’t as annoying as he was with others. He didn’t show off that he was the strongest out of everyone. He wasn’t that egotistical, cocky bastard that everyone knew he was. To you? He was willing to behave.

But he couldn’t hold back these feelings anymore. Seeing you with Nanami together, talking or laughing, he feels his heart fall into the bottom pit of his stomach. Every part of his body burns from this pain he hasn’t yet familiarized himself with. But who was he to interfere? Why was he feeling like this? Maybe he’s sick? He should go to Shoko asap.

“Shoko! Help me!” he burst to open her door as flopped himself into her bed and rolled around with his hand covering his face.

“Can’t you knock?” she gave him an exasperated sigh.

He sits up, holding himself together as his hands are on his thigh, fisted like a ball. “Listen! I might be sick, and I know who caused it.”

She raised a brow. “Oh really? Who is it?” she said as she proceeds to drink from her cup.

“Y/N-Senpai.”

That effectively made Shoko spit all her drink onto the floor. “God damn it, Gojo!”

“What!?”

“Are you serious?”

“Well… yeah. I can’t think of anything.” his body deflated, back hunched back, and he had that annoying pout on his lips.

She sighed, fighting back the urge to smack him in the head for being this oblivious. She grabbed a table napkin and decided to listen to him. “Why do you think so?”

“Whenever I look at her, or when she’s near, it’s like someone is punching my gut. And I always feel like I’m having a heart attack! That’s serious, right? And I feel like my knees will give up on me!” He emphasized every word for her to understand what he was saying—and feeling. “And get this, I saw her and Nanami together, and I felt like my heart dropped! And my body– hey! Listen to me, Shoko! This is serious!” He pouted as he had to watch her laugh hysterically, gripping her stomach.

“I might die from this illness! You don’t wanna see your friend die!”

“God, how can you be so oblivious?” She wiped her tears from laughing. “Wait– you know what I’m talking about! Tell me what’s the problem!”

“The problem is that you’re in love. If you’ll consider it a problem.”

In love. Was he… in love? With you? No, no, no. He was not. He is not in love with you. “Think about it; you felt something when she’s together with Nanami, right?” Shoko asked.

Gojo only then nodded his head. “You were jealous. It took you long enough to notice. Everyone practically knew about it.”

“Ha?!” 

No, no way he was in love with you. After that interaction with that witch (Shoko), he unconsciously began to ignore you. Your greetings were returned as empty hello’s. Occasional ‘How are you’ was thrown at the conversation but never lasted more than two minutes. He was gathering his thoughts—but being away from you hurts like hell. It hurts more than seeing you and Nanami together. It hurts more than being around you.

He wants to be around you. Forever.

It was late at night, lights all off, yet he was awake. He was contemplating whether he should call you or just sleep with this feeling. He buried his head in his pillow and sighed as he held out his phone. Then, a caller ID appeared. He jumped at the sudden interruption of his peaceful time, looking up to see who called and—

It’s you. Okay, okay, okay. Do not fuck this up, Gojo Satoru.

He picked up. “Hello?”

“Gojo! Oh good, you’re awake– or did I wake you up?”

“No, no, you’re good. What’s up?” He could feel his palm beginning to sweat, his heart beating like crazy.

“Um. Did I do something?”

His eyes widen at the question, and he then realizes wow distance he has been. Shit. I’m fucked. “N-no! What made you say that?”

“You’ve just been distant. I don’t know.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry; it’s my fault.”

“Mhmm, You probably have something going on. I’m sorry for assuming.” he can practically hear your thoughts running wild.

“Other than that, why are you still awake?” this effectively made you pause. The line was silent for a moment. It’s now or never. He hears your breathing in the other line, patiently waiting for an answer. “Gojo.”

“...Yeah?”

“I got a crush on you.” Wait. What?

“And I like you. I like–” Suddenly, the line was cut off. He quickly checked his phone, only to realize his phone shut down. “No, no, no, no!” Damn it! He forgot to charge it! He quickly grabbed his charger and rushed to the nearest outlet around him. Fuck! He was cut off in the middle of your talking—

Wait. he thinks for a moment. On the other end of the line, it’ll look like he just hung up on her. No! That’s not what happened. He bolted out of his dorm and made his way to yours. In the dead of night, he rushed through your dorm building as fast as he could. Gojo could have teleported, but he didn’t want to invade your privacy by appearing all of a sudden. And, he didn’t think of it in the state of panic he was in.

Finally, he managed to burst into your dorm, panting. He noticed the phone with his contact was displayed on your phone. He also noticed your surprised look as you whipped your head towards him with tears in your eyes.

“I’m sorry! The line suddenly cut off; my phone died!” he heard your sniffles, and he was convinced that you weren’t convinced.

“I know that’s stupid, but it’s true! Believe me, Y/N.” he looked at you intensely. Your eyes bore into his. Without his glasses, you can see how blue it is in this dark room of yours. You wiped your tears and tear your gaze away from him and focus on your lap.

“What’s your answer?”

“What?”

“I said that I like you. What is your answer?” you looked away. Even in the dark room, he noticed a pink hue on your ear. He walked closer to your bed, kneeling beside you. He takes you by the hand. “Can you look at me?”

Hesitantly, you looked at him. He was flustered and a blushing mess.

“I like you too. More than you know. I hate seeing you together with Nanami. I want to be the only person who can make you smile and laugh genuinely. I want to be the only person for you. I want to be the person who you can call at three in the morning when something happened. Let me be the person who can lend you a blazer when you are cold. Lend you a shoulder to cry on. Lend you help with it’s too much.”

Tears start to pick up from the corner of your eyes again. Gojo’s hands were shaking as he wiped the tears from your eyes. “I will become stronger in order for me to protect you. I like you too, Y/N. I have for a while.”

You let your tears flow as you smiled. Smiled turned into giggles as you wiped your tears. “I’ve never heard confession like that.”

He then whipped his head away from you. “S-so what!”

“Satoru.”

He perked up hearing his first name being called between your lips.

“I like you.” you smiled, ruffling his hair before moving away from his bangs and kissing his forehead. Gojo just plopped himself onto your thigh, too flustered to meet your eyes right now. “Finally.”

You just giggled at his childlike antics. Brushing your fingertips onto his hair, massaging his scalp in the process. “I’m happy.”

He smiled, meeting your gaze. His smile was genuine, the one you love. “Me too.”

He’s happy, he finally got her.

“But Satoru…” Gojo only hummed, content with what he got right now.

“Kento is my cousin.” What. WHAT?

© 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐀 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my work.

𝐈 𝐆𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐂𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡 𝐨𝐧 𝐘𝐨𝐮 (𝐀𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮-) || 𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔

Summary: He doesn't know about love. He gets these weird feelings whenever you're around him. And seeing you with Nanami together irks him. So, he went to his trusted friend, Shoko to see what's sickness he have gotten from you.

prompt: "I got a crush on you. And I like you. I like-" call abruptly ends

A/N: I had this idea since last year😭 And now I decided to write it again because of JJK season two! I don't know if I'm gonna write regularly. I'll throw some poems here and there, some blurbs. Since it's summer, maybe I'll write more.

Gojo wasn’t the type of person to be vulnerable. He does not like intimacy. He does not like the idea of being in a relationship, especially with his status in the Jujutsu world. He has a gift. A gift that can also bring a curse onto his life. He was the strongest out of everyone. No one can touch him. No one can hurt him.

Or so he thought. Gojo doesn’t understand this feeling—and it infuriates him. It was like punching him in the guts. He doesn’t understand the sudden heat that always appears on his face. The feeling like you’re gonna get a heart attack. When you feel your legs give out. He doesn’t understand anything; he wants to—but he’s afraid to come to you.

Because you were the cause of it. You.

You were a year older than him—the only second year in Jujutsu tech at that time when he was a first year. The first thing he noticed about you was your face. Your face is almost like silk, stern yet radiates kindness—warmth. It glows under the sun and moonlight. Then, you’re elegant. You walk elegantly, act elegantly, and talk elegantly; everything about you is elegant. It frustrates him. He cannot come up with a single word to describe you poorly, to tease you with, because in his six eyes—you were already perfect. 

You seemingly have been oblivious to the special treatment he gives you, yet others noticed. He wasn’t as annoying as he was with others. He didn’t show off that he was the strongest out of everyone. He wasn’t that egotistical, cocky bastard that everyone knew he was. To you? He was willing to behave.

But he couldn’t hold back these feelings anymore. Seeing you with Nanami together, talking or laughing, he feels his heart fall into the bottom pit of his stomach. Every part of his body burns from this pain he hasn’t yet familiarized himself with. But who was he to interfere? Why was he feeling like this? Maybe he’s sick? He should go to Shoko asap.

“Shoko! Help me!” he burst to open her door as flopped himself into her bed and rolled around with his hand covering his face.

“Can’t you knock?” she gave him an exasperated sigh.

He sits up, holding himself together as his hands are on his thigh, fisted like a ball. “Listen! I might be sick, and I know who caused it.”

She raised a brow. “Oh really? Who is it?” she said as she proceeds to drink from her cup.

“Y/N-Senpai.”

That effectively made Shoko spit all her drink onto the floor. “God damn it, Gojo!”

“What!?”

“Are you serious?”

“Well… yeah. I can’t think of anything.” his body deflated, back hunched back, and he had that annoying pout on his lips.

She sighed, fighting back the urge to smack him in the head for being this oblivious. She grabbed a table napkin and decided to listen to him. “Why do you think so?”

“Whenever I look at her, or when she’s near, it’s like someone is punching my gut. And I always feel like I’m having a heart attack! That’s serious, right? And I feel like my knees will give up on me!” He emphasized every word for her to understand what he was saying—and feeling. “And get this, I saw her and Nanami together, and I felt like my heart dropped! And my body– hey! Listen to me, Shoko! This is serious!” He pouted as he had to watch her laugh hysterically, gripping her stomach.

“I might die from this illness! You don’t wanna see your friend die!”

“God, how can you be so oblivious?” She wiped her tears from laughing. “Wait– you know what I’m talking about! Tell me what’s the problem!”

“The problem is that you’re in love. If you’ll consider it a problem.”

In love. Was he… in love? With you? No, no, no. He was not. He is not in love with you. “Think about it; you felt something when she’s together with Nanami, right?” Shoko asked.

Gojo only then nodded his head. “You were jealous. It took you long enough to notice. Everyone practically knew about it.”

“Ha?!” 

No, no way he was in love with you. After that interaction with that witch (Shoko), he unconsciously began to ignore you. Your greetings were returned as empty hello’s. Occasional ‘How are you’ was thrown at the conversation but never lasted more than two minutes. He was gathering his thoughts—but being away from you hurts like hell. It hurts more than seeing you and Nanami together. It hurts more than being around you.

He wants to be around you. Forever.

It was late at night, lights all off, yet he was awake. He was contemplating whether he should call you or just sleep with this feeling. He buried his head in his pillow and sighed as he held out his phone. Then, a caller ID appeared. He jumped at the sudden interruption of his peaceful time, looking up to see who called and—

It’s you. Okay, okay, okay. Do not fuck this up, Gojo Satoru.

He picked up. “Hello?”

“Gojo! Oh good, you’re awake– or did I wake you up?”

“No, no, you’re good. What’s up?” He could feel his palm beginning to sweat, his heart beating like crazy.

“Um. Did I do something?”

His eyes widen at the question, and he then realizes wow distance he has been. Shit. I’m fucked. “N-no! What made you say that?”

“You’ve just been distant. I don’t know.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry; it’s my fault.”

“Mhmm, You probably have something going on. I’m sorry for assuming.” he can practically hear your thoughts running wild.

“Other than that, why are you still awake?” this effectively made you pause. The line was silent for a moment. It’s now or never. He hears your breathing in the other line, patiently waiting for an answer. “Gojo.”

“...Yeah?”

“I got a crush on you.” Wait. What?

“And I like you. I like–” Suddenly, the line was cut off. He quickly checked his phone, only to realize his phone shut down. “No, no, no, no!” Damn it! He forgot to charge it! He quickly grabbed his charger and rushed to the nearest outlet around him. Fuck! He was cut off in the middle of your talking—

Wait. he thinks for a moment. On the other end of the line, it’ll look like he just hung up on her. No! That’s not what happened. He bolted out of his dorm and made his way to yours. In the dead of night, he rushed through your dorm building as fast as he could. Gojo could have teleported, but he didn’t want to invade your privacy by appearing all of a sudden. And, he didn’t think of it in the state of panic he was in.

Finally, he managed to burst into your dorm, panting. He noticed the phone with his contact was displayed on your phone. He also noticed your surprised look as you whipped your head towards him with tears in your eyes.

“I’m sorry! The line suddenly cut off; my phone died!” he heard your sniffles, and he was convinced that you weren’t convinced.

“I know that’s stupid, but it’s true! Believe me, Y/N.” he looked at you intensely. Your eyes bore into his. Without his glasses, you can see how blue it is in this dark room of yours. You wiped your tears and tear your gaze away from him and focus on your lap.

“What’s your answer?”

“What?”

“I said that I like you. What is your answer?” you looked away. Even in the dark room, he noticed a pink hue on your ear. He walked closer to your bed, kneeling beside you. He takes you by the hand. “Can you look at me?”

Hesitantly, you looked at him. He was flustered and a blushing mess.

“I like you too. More than you know. I hate seeing you together with Nanami. I want to be the only person who can make you smile and laugh genuinely. I want to be the only person for you. I want to be the person who you can call at three in the morning when something happened. Let me be the person who can lend you a blazer when you are cold. Lend you a shoulder to cry on. Lend you help with it’s too much.”

Tears start to pick up from the corner of your eyes again. Gojo’s hands were shaking as he wiped the tears from your eyes. “I will become stronger in order for me to protect you. I like you too, Y/N. I have for a while.”

You let your tears flow as you smiled. Smiled turned into giggles as you wiped your tears. “I’ve never heard confession like that.”

He then whipped his head away from you. “S-so what!”

“Satoru.”

He perked up hearing his first name being called between your lips.

“I like you.” you smiled, ruffling his hair before moving away from his bangs and kissing his forehead. Gojo just plopped himself onto your thigh, too flustered to meet your eyes right now. “Finally.”

You just giggled at his childlike antics. Brushing your fingertips onto his hair, massaging his scalp in the process. “I’m happy.”

He smiled, meeting your gaze. His smile was genuine, the one you love. “Me too.”

He’s happy, he finally got her.

“But Satoru…” Gojo only hummed, content with what he got right now.

“Kento is my cousin.” What. WHAT?

© 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐀 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my work.

Username change!!!

luv-astrd > jeanette-luminia

Jeanette Luminia is at your service! it'll take me some time to update every link but I will soon!

Edit: 6 days later, I now updated every link in my masterlist.

A heart like hers did not deserve to be in my world. Her smile is contagious. A small sight of it and the world seems to revolve around her. Once I hear her laughter—I’d want to hear it every time my brain forgets your voice. Though I do not wish for that to happen.

I want to remember every detail. Memorize every habit. I want to be the one to ask you first what you feel—whenever you feel blue. I want to be the one to lend you a shoulder to rest upon, to cry on, and to hide too.

And in case my body forgets her touch, or my memory forgets her face, the way she smiles, her laugh, her habits, everything. My soul will remember everything. For all I know—my soul lives on. The way I feel will keep my soul from remembering everything about her. And this love will never run out—even at the end of time.

hello !! how are you? it’s been so long :<

- @daylightsana

OMG HII!!! HOW ARE YOU???

I've been good. The school has been hectic and I haven't written anything for 2 months now, but I've been doing well so far! It's been so long. :(

Hi hi! Don't worry, I think I only recently sent you this ask. I'm sorry to hear that you've been struggling but I hope it ends well! Good luck on your studies and I wish you well!!

Uyy bebs, how are you?? You've been gone for a month, I hope you're doing well!!

hi love! i am not sure when you sent this, but I've been well??

things have been...interesting on my end, both good and bad. i think right now i am just hunkered down with studies, so i have been stressed about that. but i am entering my third year of my degree, and it will be a little easier compared to my second year. I'm hoping to get back into writing soon cause i miss it so much T^T

but thank you for checking up on me! it's nice to know that some people still remember me haha

𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 (𝐈 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮) || 𝐋𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐀 𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐌𝐒

PART TWO OF WOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONE

TW: Abuse, stalking? manipulative, controlling, swearing, hurt, heavy angst<3

A/N: taking a break after this, requests will be on the waitlist. this is a full 5.7k words and my whole left arm hurts. Can be read as a solo fic? I'm not sure. tell me if there's more to add in tw!

A perfect marriage was all you asked for. Being married to now your so-called husband, Desmond, you thought it would make you forget about the things from the past, more specifically, someone from your past.

But of course, love is cruel, your fate is cruel.

You gather the courage to leave the house as he asked. Well… more like demanded. You wore a long sleeve turtleneck to cover up the bruises and marks that your so-called husband had left. Grabbing a jacket on the way and stepping out of the house for the first time in a while. It almost made you squint with the amount of sunlight shining through your vision. You hesitated to step out of his house — you were too afraid. He has eyes everywhere. Everywhere you go, he will follow you.

But you perceived it. Put your hands in your pocket before going to Weathervane for coffee. Oh, how you’ve missed their coffee. The smell of freshly brewed coffee immediately made you feel homey. You waited for your coffee to be done, the usual coffee you used to have ever since before being married. The thought of you flew by. What if you hadn’t married him? You’ve imagined each scenario carefully, what would your day be like, or if you’d be with someone again.

Of course, it wasn’t possible.

You were pulled out of your reverie when a ding from a bell rang through your ear, indicating that your order is done. You politely thanked the barista and picked up the coffee from the counter and sipped through it. It's almost like your whole problem vanished away. To others, it’s a simple coffee to go by, yet to you, it feels like you were living once again.

Heading out of Wethervane, you almost forgot that someone could be watching you. Everything felt like it was normal. You thought about going to a flower shop nearby. The vases you have at home feel a little lonely and lifeless. Yes, there were flowers there, but it was always those plastic flowers that brought no life into your home whatsoever. A thought pulled you away when someone called you.

Your blood ran cold, thinking it was one of your husband’s henchmen or whatnot. Turning around, it was a friend you haven’t seen in a while. Aera.

“Y/N! Oh my gosh, I can’t believe it is you.” She held her hand out, emphasizing her words. While her face is practically beaming with excitement, almost as if she has been longing to see you. You can’t remember the last time you did see her, the past few years have been a blur. You were happy for a moment, but in the corner of your eye, you see someone staring at you. It was almost innocent. It made you sick. Desmond was a powerful man, a controlling one. Defying him would cause catastrophe in your life. 

You hated the man.

Aera stopped, noticing your distant daze. “Y/N?”

“It’s great to see you, but I have to go. I can’t talk to you, I’m sorry,” you said almost too quickly. You didn’t give her a chance to respond to what you just said before running in fear. It was a mistake going out. You should have never gone out of the house. You go away from the scene realizing you had dropped your coffee. Damn it.

You stayed in the study, reading a book you have yet to finish to distract you from the event that occurred earlier. How you wished you could stay, and catch up on how she’s been, even a hug would be nice. You have been longing for a touch that screams love. If a person asked what you wished for right now, you’d wish for a pair of arms to hold you close, and love you.

You have been daydreaming that you didn’t even realize you’ve stopped marking the book where you’ve left off.

However, your butler, Simon, had interrupted your quiet time with a piece of horrendous news you wished to not hear. “Mrs. Salvatore, your husband has arrived.” his flat tone didn’t hide the fact that he is worried for you. The staff has been fond of you ever since you arrived. It was like a sun had shone through the endless void of this horrible house. You always wondered how much they’d endured Desmond’s wrath before you came into the picture.

Before you could reply to Simon, the door opened. Your hands become clammy, trembling a little at the sight of him. He closed the door gently, and it scared you. He never closed the door gently, he usually slammed the door. He slowly loosens his tie before grabbing a whiskey bottle and a glass as you watch him pour the whiskey without saying anything. you silently signaled Simon to leave you two be, but he hesitated before granting your wishes. When he set down his glass too roughly, you knew he was mad.

“I heard you met up with Aera.” He kept his flat tone.

You tried your hardest to be composed. “Yes.” Matching his tone, you almost surprised yourself. The lack of emotions scares you.

"I also heard you left in a frantic, panicking even." He slowly rolled up his sleeves before you heard the heel of his shoes gradually come closer to you. you kept your head low, clutching the book in hand. you feared the way he looked at you.

His finger made an appearance in your vision, grabbing your chin harshly, and forcing you to look at him. "I never said you can't talk to her, now did it?"

you simply nod, afraid that your voice will betray you. He wasn't satisfied, he needed a verbal answer.

"Use your words, woman."

"Yes." Your voice cracked, tears gathering in the corner of your eye. He smiled.

"Good, I was beginning to think that it was because you feared me." he chuckled, letting go of your chin. You quickly hung my head low, slipping a few tears before wiping them away. God, how could someone be cruel?

"Well, Of course, you should fear me." he paused, drinking his whiskey from the glass he once set earlier. "After all, you are indebted to me." His cold tone made you shiver, effectively making you freeze.

You could feel his eyes boring into you. "Remember who you should fear." you didn't want to look at him. No, you could never look at him, especially in this state. He will use your fear against you, to manipulate you. That's the kind of man Desmond is. 

This was a loveless marriage you wished to get away from.

You heard his shoe clank on the floor, before hearing the door open and shut. Upon looking around the study, you took a breath you once held. Your hands are now sweaty with anxiety, and your forehead has a thin layer of sweat. You allowed yourself to slouch onto the chair, putting your hands on your face, masking away the tears forming in your eyes.

You hated this.

Aera didn’t think she could do it. It honestly surprised her that she managed to drag her feet willingly to Larissa’s house. She was initially thinking about going through her office, but making a scene will cause her trouble.

Her fingertip came in contact with the doorbell and patiently waited for the older woman to show up. As soon as she heard the rattling sound of the door hinge, she braced herself for her appearance. They haven't seen each other for four years, ever since you and Larissa broke up. Seeing her again brought back a bittersweet taste on her tongue.

When Larissa opened the door, she saw Aera standing there, clutching the strap of her bag so hard that it’ll leave a wrinkle. She hasn’t had visitors in a while, and her appearance didn’t suit her liking. She knows that she holds a grudge for what she did, she couldn’t blame her. She would too if she were in her position.

“Aera.” She stated.

“We need to discuss something.” She said, narrowing her eyes at her. “Can I come in?”

“Of course.” she stepped aside, letting the shorter woman enter her home before closing the doors. “Do you want coffee or tea?” She offered. She knew she was still mad at her, but she at least wanted her to feel comfortable, even for a moment.

“No thanks, I don’t plan to stay for long.” She said it sternly, but her actions hinted that she was getting impatient and wanted to get straight to the point. She made herself comfortable on the couch as Larissa followed her, sitting across the agitated woman.

“Okay then, What do you want to talk about?” She shifted in her seat, trying to find a comfortable position for her. Larissa’s head hung low, keeping her eyes on her hands as she fiddled with them.

Aera noticed. The way she fidgets with her hands, the way she looks more tired and frail over the years, the bags under her eyes become visible, the way that stupid necklace is still locked inside her neck with that stupid ring of hers. Not wanting to beat around the bush, she cleared her throat.

“Help Y/N.” As soon as she heard your name, she perked up. She wishes she didn’t but her body betrayed her will. “What do you mean?”

“Help Y/N get out of that loveless marriage she is having with that bastard.” she gritted her teeth, gripping the cushion she is sitting on right now. She didn’t want to ask for her help, but she knew Desmond is a powerful man, and between him and her, she could end up losing the life she had built for herself. While she was powerless, she knew Larissa had some power in her status. She hated herself for reaching out, but she had no choice. The way you looked afraid after meeting up with her, afraid of his wrath. She had no choice but to seek help.

Hearing her words, her head snapped forward, finally facing Aera. A sea of emotions flood through her. She thought you were finally happy with someone, and that you finally found someone to love. Her heart breaks, never in those four years of being separated removed you from her mind. Every day, she had always thought of you. Think about what you are doing, how have you been, or if you already have a child. She didn’t expect you to get hurt again, not after she had hurt you. She felt her eyes swell up with tears.

“Ever since she’s been married to Desmond Salvatore, Desmond practically isolated her in his home. He manipulated her to push everyone — even me.” Her eyes stung with tears as she pointed at herself. “It’s been almost a year since I last saw her. And upon seeing her again today, she was beyond scared, almost as if Desmond is following every step she makes.” She wiped the tears she shed as she hid in her hand.

“So for the love of God, help her then maybe it’ll atone for the pain you’ve caused.” she flinched at the harsh tone she used. Deep down, she desperately wants to see you, to know if you are still okay.

“I will.” Larissa narrowed her eyes at her, keeping an uncomfortable time staring at each other. She was determined to save you from that jerk, the jerk she believed will treat you with everything you deserve. She hated herself for putting you in this situation. Because to be frank, it was her fault for neglecting you and driving you away.

“Where does she live?”

She’ll make things right. She promised.

You heard the doorbell ring, you looked up curiously. It was unusual to receive visitors, especially since your husband is away. Pushing away the thought one of the maids ran to the door and opened it to see who it was. 

As the maid opened the door, she was met with an unfamiliar yet familiar woman. She knew her as the Headmistress of the Nevermore Academy, but she knew the Man in the house did not have any business with an outcast like her. She also familiarizes her with one of the stories you’ve told, about a particularly tall woman with blonde, almost white hair and that charming smile. 

“Can I help you with anything?” she asked cautiously.

Larissa tensely smiled. “Yes, I believe Y/N Salvatore lives here?” She asked, even though she knew the answer. 

You got curious, wondering why the maid is taking so long. Curiosity gets the best of you, it gets you in a lot of trouble. Upon close inspection, you saw the maid in front of the door. The familiar dress made you pause, hoping this isn’t true, wishing that this is just a dream. This is a dream. This. Is. A. Dream.

You finally looked up at the person, and you finally saw her. After years without seeing each other, it made you yearn for her. You hated how much she still affects you, you hated how much she could just show up after the torment she had put you. You hated how beautiful she is after all these years. You wanted to scream, to throw a tantrum at her. You wanted to hurt her. You want to hurt her as she hurt you. This is unfair.

“Y/N…” Her voice is laced with concern, seeing you again made her feel something, something familiar. 

“Y/N, can we talk?” She asked.

The maid in the middle of the both of you debated whether she should get rid of the woman, or let her in. she looked at you, practically asking you to give her some sort of order. You stood still, this is now a one-time opportunity that you worry if you reject, you’d regret for the rest of your life. You sighed deeply, finally looking at the maid.

“Please leave us be, Bella.” You gave the older woman a tired smile. You could tell she was conflicted, you walked over to her and placed your hand on top of hers before nodding slightly. It gave enough reassurance before leaving the both of you.

When the maid left, your eyes were now glued to the floor. “Come in.” your voice was a mere whisper and insisted she follows you. She gently closes the door and soon follows you into the corridor. She looked around the walls, the picture frames, and the paintings. She noticed the states that the maids had given her, it was like they were judging her severely.

Once both of you entered the study, her eyes fell on the big picture frame in the middle above the fireplace. It was you in one of your fancy dresses, she guessed your Desmond bought it for you. You sat still in the chair while Desmond stood, hand behind your back. It made her sick.

“Why are you here?” Your voice is laced with anger, turning around to the woman who is still staring at the photo that you loathed.

She then looked at you. Seeing what's inside of you, what you hide, what you seek, what you’ve been longing for. That's how she looked at you. It made you feel exposed.

“Leave him.”

“Leave who?”

“Don’t play dumb Y/N. Leave that bastard. That bastard you now call husband.” Her anger is spilling, she looked at you more with determination. You’ve never seen her like this, you’ve never seen her so worked up. She was getting furious, not to you, but to him.

“I cannot leave my husband.” you weakly said, keeping your eyes on her.

She scoffed at your blindness. She knows you can see the terrible things Desmond has done, but she doesn’t understand why you’d choose to stay. Just tell me, she thought. Tell me what you need. 

She hits you with a question that makes you tear up, almost wanting to hunch back and sob. “Do you love him?” she asked.

You do not love him. You would never love him. He loathes you, you hated him. Nothing in this marriage is fair. This is a loveless, hateful marriage. You hated him. You wanted to tell her that you hated him, that you wanted to run away.

“I love him…” Your voice betrayed you, wanting to kick yourself mentally. You never wished to hesitate, but it was all too much. You hated how much you are showing to the woman you once loved. But then again, did you really stop loving her? You wanted to love him, you really tried. But he made it clear from the start. You were nothing but a nuisance.

“You’re lying.”

“I am not.”

“Leave him.” she insists. She never once raised her voice, or accused you of anything, it made you think about what changed her. “I cannot leave.” You emphasized. It was getting harder to breathe. She can see it, the way you clutched your chest, the way she saw the glisten of a thin layer of sweat on your forehead.

“Please tell me why.” She pleads. She wants to hold you, embrace you and protect you. But knowing you, it’ll only feel like she’s caging you.

“Because I am indebted to him.” You silently sobbed, holding everything in was all too much. You sobbed your heart out whilst keeping your voice inside. Ever since being with Desmond, you learned to cry silently. It became a habit.

You hugged yourself as you gripped your shoulders too hard. Surely it’ll leave a mark. “My father loaned money for me to live. Now that he is gone, I am now indebted to him.” You finally meet her gaze, and finally, notice her changes. Her face suddenly got thin, emphasizing the hollow space in her cheeks. Her clothes look slightly bigger to her. The bags under the eyes were now visible. Even her lipstick has changed, going for a darker red rather than the red she usually wore. Your eyes landed on her neck, specifically, the ring on her necklace. You wondered if it had always been there before, or that she found another woman to love. It confused you. You hated how much of an effect she had on you.

“Do you get it now? I cannot leave—”

A beat. It made you freeze. “And you never will.”

You looked at him with wide eyes, fearing him. He heard you, he heard your conversation. What's worse is that he had caught you talking with your ex. “Leave us, Simon.” As much as your butler hated it, he left the three of you to unfold what’s gonna happen.

“Now.” his voice laced with venom, making you flinch. You clenched your fist together and bit your lower lip which will surely bruise later on. “Why on earth are you here, Weems?” Your instinct was said to protect her. You don’t know why. It was like your heart decided for you, and not your head.

“–She was just about to leave!” You interrupted Larissa before she managed to utter a word. Before she can interject, you manage to grab her hand and lead her through the door. You pushed Larissa away from your study, and with your frantic movement and teary gaze, you plead for her to leave. “Leave now. Please leave.” you plead before hearing your husband call your name.

“I need a word with my wife.” He suddenly appeared beside you, hand firmly gripping your waist, making you wince in pain. Avoiding her protest, Desmond roughly guided you back into the study.

She hesitated, before seeing the man called Simon from earlier. She noticed his worried feature. She now noticed how the house seemed tense, almost as if they knew what was gonna happen. He paced around, his hands fiddled in anticipation, but he couldn’t do anything other than hear the moment unfold.

Suddenly, he was broken out of his reverie when the tall woman he once saw beside you walked up to her with haste. He gathered his composure quickly and bowed to the taller woman. “Call the police.” He froze at her words, he looked at her and saw how watery her eyes are. He saw how desperate she was to save the lady in this house. He felt a sense of respect for her.

“Understood.” He quickly fled the corridor, sprinting as he look for a phone to make a call. Larissa stood there, thinking about what she should do next. Should she waits for the police to arrive? Or Should she barge into the doors? Her thoughts racked her mind, standing in the middle of the halls. But the sound of the glass shatter in the study room, where you and Desmond are, made her snap out of her reverie. Without thinking, her feet dragged her towards the study and busted open the door.

She couldn’t forget the look on your face, crawling backward to get away from Desmond. The fear plastered in your eyes was unbearable to look at, the way you shook your head continuously, making up words she can’t even hear anymore. Desmond holds a broken red wine bottle, dripping with leftover red wine. If someone saw this scene, you’d think it's blood. If she was to wait for the police, it would all be too late, and she would break the promise she made to herself.

So, she chose the latter.

“You are a disgrace. Choosing the woman who once hurt you. Are you that much of a whore?” His laughter bombarded the whole study. His voice was loud enough for at least someone to hear him. That was her last straw. She couldn’t take it anymore, the insults, the death stares, and now this. She grabbed the nearby vase on the pedestal and ran toward where Desmond slowly inched away from you. Desmond was too focused on you that he didn’t notice Larissa with a vase in hand.

She lifted the vase. Then, Desmond sensed her presence, she looked behind him. The look she gave him made Desmond… afraid. It made his knees weak, it was a look that no one dared to give him up until now, it almost looks like a killer look. Larissa looked at him with pure spite, pure hatred. She gripped the vase hard, almost cracking it. Before Desmon could even react, Larissa had smashed the vase on his head, breaking it into pieces as he fall onto his knees.

He couldn’t comprehend what happened, his head pounded so loudly, it made his ears bleed. He was on his knees as he gripped his head where he was hit, he felt something wet and thick. Looking at his hand, he saw his own blood painting his hand. While Desmond was preoccupied with himself, Larissa had run onto your shaking figure, whispering nothing but pleas and mercy.

“Darling, come with me, I’ll get you out of here.” She changed her whole demeanor as if she was now a different person to you. You trembled upon seeing that just happened, you were afraid, but not to her. Something about her made you lose your fear, maybe the way she used her voice? The tone? Her gentle eyes? Her soft hands? You don’t know anymore. You don’t want to know anymore.

You want to take her hand, but you were too paralyzed to do so. But she was patient, it was something you were glad she hasn’t changed about herself. You nearly missed the way Desmond picked himself up, grabbing the broken wine bottle beside him. You felt your fear spike up again, the urge to push this woman away from this. This is your problem, she shouldn’t be here, she shouldn’t be in this mess to begin with. This is your problem, yours only.

She should have just left you alone, then maybe, she won’t witness you like this.

You pushed her away, creating a gap between you as Desmond swung the wine bottle in between you. You missed the way your heart skipped a beat, you nearly stopped breathing. You crawled away before he could swing it again, now facing you. But before it could hit you, Simon grabbed his wrist, twisting it at an unusual angle, while he grabbed his other wrist and put it behind his back. Desmond screamed in pain, dropping the wine bottle right before you. 

You heard the siren from the police nearby gradually getting louder and louder. “What is the meaning of this, Simon?” He yelled demandingly, screaming like a maniac. His eyes grew wide. He was livid, mad. You feared that Simon would get hurt, or anyone for that matter. You never want anyone to go through this. “Simon!” You yelled.

“That’s enough torment to lady Y/N.” He said. This was the side you never saw in him. He was kind, always with a smile. This side was something different. Before Desmond could do any more damage, the police finally rounded him. When the police pointed the gun at him, telling him to put his hand up, you felt a wave of relief wash over you. You finally allowed yourself to breathe freely. You know that it is not truly over, but you wanted to feel free, at least for a moment.

“Desmond Salvatore, you are under arrest.” You recognize the voice. Looking up where you sat, Sheriff Galpin emerged through the door, holding his gun up and a handcuff in his other hand. Simon let go of him as the police took over, putting the handcuffs behind Desmond. “No, this isn’t right, the real lunatic here is her!” he pointed at Larissa, who, at the time, was gathering the strength to stand up. She didn’t dare to speak, not because she was guilty of the wound she gave Desmond. She only stared at him, she was calm — almost too calm. It was unsettling, even for you. Desmond clicked his tongue as she stared at Larissa for too long, towering at her height. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he felt intimidated by her.

He snapped his neck toward your frail figure, and he ran toward you but failed to do so. Fortunately, Sheriff Galpin had caught him in the act and pulled him back immediately, not only that, Larissa had stepped between the space you had between him. “Tell them, Y/N! Tell them that she’s the fucking lunatic.” His remarks made you jolt, flinching at his harsh words. The Sheriff had pushed him out of the study, nodding at Larissa before sending Desmond away for a long time. She finally sighed as she felt the room become more spacious, finally able to breathe for a while.

Turning around to see you still on the floor, long lost in your reverie. She hunched down, eyeing your eyes. She only sees fear, it was somehow the same fear you had when she had lashed out four years ago. Using her fingernails to tap on the floor, making her presence noticeable. “Can you stand?” You only shook your head, feeling the adrenaline rush through you, you were afraid that if you tried to stand up, you’d just fall.

“Allow me.” Simon butted in, gently taking your hands and lifting you up. You were shaken up at this point, not knowing what to do. “Let’s take you to your bedroom.” His soft gentle voice made you ease your racing heart, following him as he guided you into your bedroom. Larissa stayed behind, watching closely your interaction with him. She watched in awe, awe at how much people care for you. As soon as the three of you had stepped out of the study, a horde of maids gathered around, checking up on your condition.

“Oh, Mrs. Y/N.” Bella’s voice managed to get through the crowd, looking at the damage that Desmond has caused right before her eyes. “Let her through.” She said irritatedly. Once those words left her mouth, the maid made way for you to get through. You thanked them silently, but you wished you could have worded it better.

Just before Larissa could join you upstairs to your bedroom, Bella had called her in. “Ms. Weems.”

Larissa turned around. She noticed that she held out a tray with the first aid kit box, A jar of water, and a glass. Her expressions were something Larissa couldn’t read. She drew her lips thin as the older woman inched closer the tray towards her, indicating that she should take it. “It seems like Mrs. Y/N needs you more than us.” Then, Larissa saw a small, yet kind smile from the older woman, her worries ease. She slowly took the tray. She glanced at the woman who have this… relief on her face. Or was it something else? She couldn’t decipher.

“Thank you.” She excused herself, making her way up the stairs to go to your room. In the corner of her eye, she saw Simon entering one of the rooms down the hall through the left, she guessed it was your room and headed towards it. The first sight she sees is the big window illuminating the dark red curtains. She noticed how your bed was made, the same way you made your bed every time she visits. She sees you sitting on the edge of the bed, back facing toward her. Simon had draped the curtains on the side, letting the sunlight shines. As Simon turned around, he saw Larissa holding a tray with the first aid kit needed and water.

He smiled in her direction before leaving the room.

Larissa slowly made her way toward you, fear and anxiety slowly creeping up on her body. She set the tray on your bedside table and grabbed the nearby chair to face you. “... Can I see your face?” She hesitated, looking into your hands fidgeting. Right before she could say something again, you had shown your face to her, now staring at her eyes. She couldn’t form any words, she only stared at you.

She searched your face, neck, and neck for any clear signs of injury. She did, however, found a few bleeding cuts on your arm and legs, guessing from when Desmond had shattered the glass. She quickly cleaned each cut gently, putting petroleum jelly and covering it with a bandaid whilst looking at you, silently asking for your consent.

She finally looked up, finishing covering the wound you have on your knee when she noticed your eyes drifting away from somewhere, staring at something. She followed your eyes, only to find that you’d been staring at the ring she has on her neck. She felt her shoulder stiff, unconsciously grabbing the right and fiddling with it whilst you continue to stare at it.

“What’s with the ring?” you murmured, pointing out the right from her neck before looking at her with hesitant eyes. Did she really find someone better? But if she did, where are they?

“Your thoughts are quite loud.” She breathlessly chuckled, already knowing what was going through your mind by reading your eyes change. The way your pupils change, or when you subtly bit the bottom lip of yours. You chuckled alongside her, finding it amusing how she can still read you. “This is…” She hesitated before looking at you. Taking a deep breath and gathered the courage to say it.

It’s now or never.

This is supposedly the ring I was gonna propose to you.” She muttered the last part, she thought you didn’t hear it, but the way your eyes widen by surprise, jaw slacked, almost open — she knew you had heard her. “I’m sorry.” She said, taking your hand.

“I’m so sorry that I hurt you.” Her voice cracked, tears gathering in her eyes, and gently caressed your thumb. You had your head low, meaning she couldn’t see your face. Part of her wants to know how you reacted, how you comprehend it. But, another part of her wants to keep your face hidden within her reach, she doesn’t want the same thing to repeat over again. She noticed how your chest rises up rapidly while trying to maintain it at the same time, and your shoulder is rigid, trembling every time you breathe.

“I can’t…” you said. “I can’t trust you anymore.” you cried out, waves of emotions hits you like an ocean, trying to get to the surface to breathe only to be hit with another large wave, pulling you away from the surface. “I just can’t.”

“... Will you let me?”

“Let you what?” You asked, barely a whisper anymore.

“Will you let me show you that you can trust me?” She let her tears slip.

You shook your head, retracting the hand that once held hers, “I don’t trust myself enough to pull away when I needed to.” you explained as best as you can without your hiccups breaking off what you were saying.

She understands. If she was in your shoes, she wouldn’t either. But she was deeply, madly crazy for you. She wanted to try again. She wants to wait for you, at least for you to trust her once more. She will try again and again. She wants to give you the life you have deserved once more. She does not want to fuck up as she did.

“I'm not demanding you to trust me, I am asking you. I want you to know that you have a choice in this. Then, will you let me show you that you can trust me again?”

Maybe some part of you wished she’d keep pushing. Pushing the thought of trusting her again — of course, it’ll take time. She knew that. She knew that there will be a chance when you’d trust her again, and there will be one where you won’t — leaving her. She was willing to make that chance. It was her decision.

You didn’t say anything for the rest of the day. You let Larissa take care of you, nurture you back. You didn’t say anything, you knew deep inside, you were willing you let her show you.

© 𝐋𝐔𝐕-𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐃 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate. please ask me first then credit me once you shared my work to other platforms.

wip for part two of "Would have been the One" !!

That's all <333 (Those are two different screenshots!!)

I'm very happy with my new theme!

𝐋𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐚 𝐖𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

New years Joy : New years are always loud and chaotic, but watching her made it peaceful.

Lie when you Cry : Yoy was getting better, and everything was doing fine. but then it all came crashing down. you broke her promise, is she mad about it?

Different Perspectives : She admired the tattoo you got that was engraved with her initials, she wonders why you would do such a thing. To her, she wasn't the standard of a woman, to you, she was a goddess.

Needed to hear : Your mother's visit was unpleasant. Larissa said the things you have been dreading for your mother to tell you.

There for you : Larissa is a strong woman, adored by everyone, and a role model to young students at nevermore Academy. But every strong woman has a limit, even her.

Bravest thing : "What's the bravest you've ever done?" "Asking for help."

Pretty Girl : She gets flustered seeing your body with only your swing suit on a beach,

I found you : You got lost on the train with Larissa, and when you saw her, she was already staring at you.

Would have been the One : Hey can you do a Larissa x femreader where reader insecurities get the best of her (age gap and how she looks maybe) and Larissa being stressed with work just push her more down to that hole and there's no happy ending...... sorry i just want to have a good cry

Deadlines : Larissa x Autistic reader where they have a meltdown & Larissa finds them & comforts them n just a lot of fluff n kisses

Valentine Kiss : I would like to make a Larissa Weems X Fem reader request where r is a teacher at Nevermore and Larissa just has a huge crush on her (the crush is mutual ofcourse). And she decides to get r a bouquet of flowers and a gift (favourite book, coat to match Larissa, piece of jewelry, anything of that sort) on Valentine's day and asks her out.

Que r getting all mushy and giving Larissa many kisses, maybe even a cuddle scene afterwards if you're up for it!

Malfunction : may i ask for a fic where everytime larissa smiles, whether it be directed to reader or to someone else, reader just... malfunctions. like stopping or forgetting whatever she's doing for a moment and smiling like an idiot, who still does her best to compose herself because she needs to do things but larissa's smile is really making it difficult. so, reader decided to take a breather outside but then larissa followed her. cue to reader saying "one more smile and you'll be the death of me" or something. i just want the fluffiest fluff to ever fluff, if it's okay with you.

Confused Feelings : Okay okay so I just read your most recent Larissa x reader and thought “what if it’s reversed?” Where instead of reader malfunctioning, it’s Larissa and it makes her confused at first because she’s usually so well composed but whenever she sees reader she just turns to mush. She later realizes she has feeling for reader but they’re very clueless and thinks they are doing something wrong because Larissa would avoid them whenever they’re alone. But still fluffy ending. Thank you!!

Second Chance : Hi!! can I request a Larissa x teacher!reader with a really shy reader but is also a people pleaser. Basically reader finally asks Larissa out on a date. Reader wanted it to be the best date ever so they planned a lot but Larissa completely forgets. And I mean like maybe a few days have passed and she still hasn’t remembered because of work. Reader doesn’t want to make a fuss so acts okay but also avoids Larissa a little until one day, Marilyn (just Marilyn) who is reader’s best friend who was maybe away for a conference comes back and asks Larissa how the big date went and Larissa panics and apologizes to reader and asks for a second chance. Fluffy ending please. Thank you!!

A Family : Hello i love your job. My request is could you write a fic where Larissa and reader are dog moms🙏🏻

Tolerate : Hey, i wanna thank you for the "Whould had been the one" fic! Seriously it made me cry!! You took exactly what i was looking for, so thank you!! 💞 and i want to request another one if it's not a problem, Larissa x femreader inspired in tolerate it by taylor swift!

Marry me : Any chance you'd write a super fluffy piece Larissa x fem!reader, Larissa has always wanted to go to a ball and loves the classic piece "on the beautiful blue danube" so reader surprises her with a trip to Vienna (can be anywhere, but Vienna and waltz kinda go together) and they have a super romantic evening and dance until morning? I just have this super soft image of Larissa dancing in a super flowy dress to a classic piece of music being regal and all. Thank you.:) If you're not interested it's also cool, I'll just keep dreaming. :)

Trust me again (I will show you) : After four years of separation, now being married to someone, Larissa finally finds out about your relationship with him. [PART TWO OF "WOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONE."]

Heart like hers.

© 𝐉𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐄 𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐀 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my work.

Any chance you'd write a super fluffy piece Larissa x fem!reader, Larissa has always wanted to go to a ball and loves the classic piece "on the beautiful blue danube" so reader surprises her with a trip to Vienna (can be anywhere, but Vienna and waltz kinda go together) and they have a super romantic evening and dance until morning? I just have this super soft image of Larissa dancing in a super flowy dress to a classic piece of music being regal and all. Thank you.:) If you're not interested it's also cool, I'll just keep dreaming. :)

𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐌𝐞 || 𝐋𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐀 𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐌𝐒

Larissa Weems x French!reader

a/n: Honestly, I didn't really thought about making reader french but as I write this, I started thinking of French pet names and I had to.

edit: Thank you for @alder-saan for correcting me! I hope my changes are better! don't be shy to correct me if I'm still wrong.

“What is something you’ve been longing for a while?” You asked while you gently combed her hair in between your fingers. Her head was on your lap as you both sat in front of the fireplace. Moments like these you wished would stay forever.

She hummed, shifting her body to think more comfortably. “I’ve always wanted to go to a ball. I’ve always imagined myself dancing to a classical piece I love. Maybe dance around till sunrise.” Her tone was almost bittersweet, almost as if she was calling her inner child.

You stopped combing her hair. Instead, you gave her a forehead kiss, and another, and another, until her whole face was covered with your kiss. She giggled, “Darling, what is this?”

“Hm, I just love you.”

“I love you too.”

Ever since she mentioned that to you, you started to look forward to this semester break. Normally, you and Larissa would stay indoors, reading books with each other. Sometimes, go to Weathervane for morning coffee after your walk. There is a rare occasion when you’d travel somewhere for a vacation. But you couldn’t think of a better way to spend a semester break with your wife.

Being stressed out from the recent activities, especially after the Marilyn-Laurel incident, she’s been overworking herself. If she wasn’t behind her desk at night, she’s pace around her office. She buried herself with work, forgetting to take care of herself. It breaks your heart having to watch her in this state.

At the end of the semester, most students were in their dorms, giving you the advantage to go to her office undetected. Students like to tease both of you whenever you visit her office. Not being a teacher at Nevermore, whenever you visit the academy, the students always anticipate their principal being more at ease, and chirpy even.

It gave them a slight advantage to slip away from trouble.

Your knuckles came in contact with the door. The sound of knocking made Larissa perk up and turned her attention through the door. “Come in.”

At the sight of you, she immediately relaxed her once rigid shoulder and let herself breathe for what seemed like forever. “Hello, my dear.” she smiled, leaning against your soft touch.

“Hello, mon ange.” Your French was rich, she mewls over the way your voice manages to send shivers down her spine.

“I have a surprise for you.” You slowly moved away as you approached her desk and placed your bag to search for a specific paper.

“Hm? What is it?” She curiously glanced inside your bag.

You perked up, grabbing the paper and turning in her direction before showing her the plane ticket you had bought. “I believe we deserve our overdue vacation.”

She read the ticket carefully, tracing her fingers against the paper. You pushed yourself onto her desk and sat comfortably, patiently waiting for her reaction.

“I…” She whispered, she looked up to face you. “I don’t deserve this.”

“Yes you do, ma cher. You’ve been stressing and overworking yourself. With the recent events, you haven’t had peace of mind.” She leaned her head on your lap whilst you’ve completely sat on her desk, laptop, and paperwork have been disregarded. “You out of the people need a break.”

She slowly shook her head. You gently grabbed her face and made her look at you. “I bought this ticket for you, just for you, ma chérie fille. Pretty please, come with me to Vienna, I’ll be lonely there.” you plead, giving her a forehead kiss, a kiss on both cheeks, and a deep kiss on her lips.

Her hands roamed around your waist, hips, and thigh before pulling away. Her lipstick smudged your face, it made you more beautiful than ever. “How could I refuse a kiss like that? Hm? Planning to leave me when I refuse.” she smirked.

“Well, I don’t wanna waste money now do we?”

The week goes by smoothly, packing the things you need and making sure you’ve booked the right hotel. When you arrive in Vienna, you can practically see her beaming face when she looks out the balcony to see the city lights at night.

“There's a ballroom here, shall we visit?” You asked, containing the excitement in your voice. When she turned around, her eyes were glistening with excitement, barely making the effort to hide it.

“Really?” She asked.

“Yes, but before we go, wear this, Love.” You pulled out a dress from the closet and showed it to her. Her reaction made everything worth it. “Is this…”

“Yes, I commissioned it just for you.” You said, placing the dress on the bed and the heels you bought for her. “Get ready, amour. A surprise will be waiting for you outside the door.” you kissed her forehead before heading out the door.

Watching you leave, she couldn’t believe she had found someone like you to marry. Deciding to not want you to wait any longer, she quickly made her way through the bathroom to change. You made the dress easy to wear, just how she always wanted it. The way their heels were the right amount of height for her. 

You notice every little detail about what she loves and what she does not.

When she was done, she stepped out of the door, hoping to see you. But she was met by a staff member from the hotel. “Ah, Mrs. Weems, follow me, your wife is waiting in the ballroom,” they said as they gently gestured for her to follow them. She bowed her head, silently thanking her as she followed the staff.

She could tell she was getting closer, with the music growing louder and louder until she was in front of the door. The staff opened the door, “I hope you’ll have a wonderful time.” they smiled as Larissa entered the door before shutting it close.

Her eyes admired how spacious it was. The decorations and the art on the ceiling, she spins, admiring the art she can admire right now.

“I knew that dress would suit you.” She stopped, her eyes landing on your figure. She could feel her jaw slacken, heat creeping up to her neck, making her heart beat faster than it ever was. Your dress hugged your figure just right, your hair nicely updo. 

“tu as l'air divine, mi amour.” you walked, opening your arms as you caressed her cheeks. “Darling, you know I can’t speak French.”

“That’s the best part, my darling wife.”

“I can’t believe you did this.” 

“Believe it,” you said, placing a kiss on the corner of her lip. “I’ll make you believe it. You deserve this. You deserve everything. You deserve my love, everyone’s love. You deserve to be spoiled with affection and showered with love. I love you forever. Even when I can’t.” 

“I love you forever. Even when I shouldn’t.” Tears slipped from her eyes. You gently kissed the tears and smiled.

“May I have this dance?” Suddenly, music echoed through the room. She was piqued when she heard a classical piece she loved so much.

You chuckled. “I remember you saying that you wanted to dance to a classical piece you love.” you paused, taking both of her hands and dragging her to the center. “So, let’s dance, beautiful”

You didn’t need to utter any more words, she grabbed your waist and held your hand up, waltzing around the empty room like you own the place. Feeling like a medieval princess dancing with a prince, but it’s not a prince. 

Her dress flows as you sprung her around, a smile you could never forget. Both of you laughed and danced. For once, forgetting that time was against you, that time was ticking. For a moment, you let this scene play out, as it should.

“Marry me.”

“Honey, I’m already married to you.” She chuckled.

“I know, but I wanna marry you again,” you said. “And again, and again, and again. Until we grow old.”

“Okay.”

While everything around her was asleep, this moment feels alive, dancing till the sun has risen.

Translation:

mon ange - My angel

mon cher - My dear

amour - Love

tu as l'air divin, mon amour - You look divine, my love.

© 𝐋𝐔𝐕-𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐃 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate. please ask me first then credit me once you shared my work to other platforms.

I need to remind myself every time I write that the word count doesn't matter. My headspace is always "1,500+ words should be enough to be a good writer."

How I write when I’m not motivated

Want to know the secret to how I continue writing when I’m just not feeling it?

I don't.

You don’t need to be writing every day — you’re still a writer if you don’t!

Everyone has their own routine and their own pace, and in a society where we value productivity over anything else (the biggest side-effect of capitalism!), it’s difficult to EVER feel like you’re doing enough.

Make sure you’re writing enough for YOU, and that you’re doing it when you are feeling well-enough to do so.

You might not need inspiration to write, but what you do need is your well-being.

Repeat after me: Your word count does not reflect your worth as a writer.

I don't even know what to say! I keep missing the big numbers😭 But thank you for following me! I'm so glad you liked my writing enough to follow😭

Honestly in a span of 15 days after getting 200 followers? I'm fucking happy. ❤️

YOU SERIOUSLY ARE THE BEST!!!!! THE "TOLERATE" FIC IS SO GORGEOUS AND SAD!! I LOVED IT, THANK YOU. YOU REALLY CAUGHT WAS I WAS HOPING FOR!! 🥺💕 btw part 2? 👀👀

I'm honestly so fricking glad I've captured what you were hoping for!! I live to impress you and others!

Honestly would love to write a part two cuz I'm thinking of stuff👀 but I'm hitting the procastination pit that I can barely get out so we'll see. 👁️👁️

WHY IS HER VOICE SO SEXY? IT'S TINGLING MY EARS.

Appreciate her voice with me.

Hey, i wanna thank you for the "Whould had been the one" fic! Seriously it made me cry!! You took exactly what i was looking for, so thank you!! 💞 and i want to request another one if it's not a problem, Larissa x femreader inspired in tolerate it by taylor swift!

𝐓𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 || 𝑳𝑨𝑹𝑰𝑺𝑺𝑨 𝑾𝑬𝑬𝑴𝑺

a/n: I'm sorry it took so long! My life is a mess rn. Also I don't know if I interpret the song correctly, this is just from my perspective.

Warning: kinda asshole larissa :( , reader deserves to be loved, arranged marriage.

You stared at her on the other side of the living room, watching her reading with her head low. The way she lets herself relax as she quietly reads next to the fireplace. When falls asleep, you watch her breathing with her eyes closed. Grabbing a blanket and covering her from the cold night.

You noticed everything. Everything she does, everything she doesn't. She was older and wiser while you were just a kid. A kid in her and everyone's eyes.

You hate it. You hate it even more how she tolerates the way you put the effort into your relationship. Waiting every night for her to come home, putting fancy shit on the table. She tolerates everything.

She tolerates you.

It was a matter of arrangement between you and Larissa. An arranged marriage for your father to support the outcast community that you know he doesn't care about. But needed a good reputation, seemingly enough, supporting the outcast was an easier route. The school needed support that time, and with a heavy heart, Larissa agreed to marry you.

She set out one rule for you. Never fall in love with me.

It was her only rule.

You tried your hardest to please her, at least for you to be comfortable with each other's company. You stayed at home, as she said. You would greet her everyday when she comes home. Cleaning the whole house till she likes it.

You became madly in love with her.

You always hope she'd change. That one day, one day, she'd greet you with a smile, kiss your forehead goodbye, and smile as she entered your shared house to see you, to hug you. You longed for her to change.

And loving her hurts so much.

Longing is painful. Keeping your hopes up is painful. Loving Larissa Weems is painful.

"Welcome home, Larissa." you greeted as she walked past you as if you didn't exist. You forxced yourself to smile.

"Have you eaten today? I made your favorite."

"How would you know my favorite?" she bitterly said, taking a glass of water before gulping it.

You clenched your jaw, feeling your heart break. Then, you chuckled, letting a few tears slip by your eyes. "Because I actually make an effort."

"you and I both know this is an arrangement." she sighed. "I don't get why you're still making an effort."

You snapped your eyes towards her. "Because I fell in love with you damn it!" you slammed your hands to the counter.

"And I know you had a rule but god, I still fell for you." Her eyes widened, shocked from that moment. "And It hurts. It hurts loving you because I know you tolerate it, tolerate me."

"Then why don't you leave?"

You sniffled. "because I know how much you care for Nevermore Academy." you straighten your posture, feeling an overwhelming pain wash over you. "The least that I could do is to stay."

You turned to her, eyes puffy and wobbly lips. "If you want me to stop, then I'll stop caring."

She hated it. She hated how she pushed you away.

She hated how you became cold to her. How you manage to make this house empty even with you in it. She hated how lonely it has been.

She hated it. She hated how she managed to love you after she gave you scars that will never heal.

She hated herself. She hated that she loved you too late.

© 𝐋𝐔𝐕-𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐃 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate. please ask me first then credit me once you shared my work to other platforms.

Hello i love your job. My request is could you write a fic where Larissa and reader are dog moms🙏🏻

𝐀 𝐅𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 || 𝑳𝑨𝑹𝑰𝑺𝑺𝑨 𝑾𝑬𝑬𝑴𝑺

A/N: I love my Job as well. Shorter than what I usually write but I hope this is fine!

“I’m home,” Larissa called out as she entered your shared house. As she stepped inside, she noticed that the living room was empty. Usually, you’d be in the living room reading a book or cooking in the kitchen with Hestia.

“In here!” you hushed your voice, enough for her to hear you coming from your shared bedroom. She proceeds to enter as she witnesses something that makes her heart melt. You lay down with Hestia by your side, specifically on Larissa’s side of the bed.

“What is this?” she playfully asked.

“Well, I played with her for too much and now she’s tired.” You gently patted her fur.

Larissa made her way to her side of the closet and picked out her nightgown before stripping down and changing her outfit. When she was ready for bed, she sees that you haven’t woken up Hestia by your side.

“Darling?”

“Can you sleep in the guest bedroom?” you teased. Of course, you weren’t serious, and she knows it. She smirked and playfully pouted and she placed her hand on her chest, indicating she was hurt.

“Dear, you’d choose a dog over me? Your daring wife?” 

“I mean! She’s sleeping so soundly.”

“How am I supposed to sleep like her if I’m not with you.”

“You’ll find a way.” you playfully retorted as you put the covers to cover your body. “Now shoo, I need my beauty sleep.”

As you close your eyes, you feel a pair of arms wrap around your waist as Larissa lifts you up for her to lie on the bed. As the bed shook, Hestia woke up as well.

“Larissa Weems! You put me down this instant!” You laughed, hitting her arm lightly.

“No Y/N Weems, I will sleep with you.”

Both of you laughed whilst Hestia stood up on the bed and started barking as if you were being attacked.

“Hestia save Mama!” You yelled as Hestia sniffled and moved around the bed.

Larissa caged you with her body. “No Hestia! Don’t save Mama!” She snorted. Feeling her stomach tighten from laughing too much, she let you go as Hestia lay down.

“My stomach hurts,” you said.

She smiled, facing your direction. “It's your fault.” 

“‘Tis not.” you mocked, feeling laughter erupt in the room again.

As the laugh settle down, both of you and Larissa heard Hestia whimper. “Poor baby, don’t worry, you can sleep in the bed,” Larissa said.

“Really?”

“Yes really.”

“Hmm.” you snuggled with Larissa, feeling your furry companion snuggle with the both of you as drowsiness overcomes the both of you.

“Good night…” Your voice was merely a whisper, falling asleep afterward.

“Good night, Love. Good night Hestia.” She called out before turning off the lights. Her heart swells from the love of her little family.

© 𝐋𝐔𝐕-𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐃 - all rights reserved. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate. please ask me first then credit me once you shared my work to other platforms.

I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT I LOVE UR FICS SO SO MUCH THEY MAKE ME SOOOO FEEL SO MANY POSITIVE THINGS AND IM SO HAPPY RN CUZ I JUST FOUND OUT THAT UR ALSO FILIPINO 😭 HAJSNXHSN I’m sorry for the all caps im just ahjsbcjsjsndjjd overjoyed, I hope you’re doing well! 💗

OMG, I WAS SUPPOSED TO ANSWER THIS YESTERDAY BUT I FORGOT BECAUSE OF HOMEWORK. 😭

But I'm so flattered that you love my fics!! My goal is to make people feel things! and yes I am Filipino! I'd love to write more filipino!reader but time isn't on my side. 💔