Anti Larries Don't Do Masterposts Full Of Stereotypes, Don't Force Them Out Of The Closet, Don't Take

Eleanor goes to public events with Louis to keep up appearances. This has been the case for a long time. 

Eleanor’s purpose as a beard is to be an answer to the question  “Who is Louis dating?” because if there’s a woman he is dating, it shuts down a lot of speculation about his sexuality. If Louis goes alone, then there is no answer to “who did he take as his plus one?” and that invites more speculation. 

Louis also cannot out himself to his friends’ extended families. That would create a great deal of drama. He cannot expect everyone in a wedding party to keep a secret and take no photos of himself with Harry. If Louis were dating a man who was a nobody, he might be able to get away with introducing him as a friend. If Louis were secretly dating Oli, he would already be getting away with it - Oli has gone to weddings with Louis and Eleanor. But Harry and Louis haven’t publicly been close friends for a long time and so the two of them together would attract a lot of attention and gossip, which isn’t really a polite thing to bring to someone else’s wedding.

So can Harry and Louis attend weddings together? Yes. If it’s a small wedding of people they know, trust, and are out to, then they could go as a couple. We would probably never know they were there because they wouldn’t want to risk the public seeing photos and asking questions. But they don’t need to. Busy  people go to weddings without their partner all the time. Closeted people go to weddings without their partner all the time. I know that as a fandom, many would like to see them doing cute, romantic, couple-y things together. But real life isn’t a fairy tale and the older you get, the less big events matter to a relationship. 

Now, why is Louis still doing this if he is “free”? First, let’s be clear: He isn’t fully free. He will never be free of the homophobia that put him in a closet in the first place. He will never be free of his beards because they will always be in his past. And those two things make navigating his future very complicated and very difficult, especially because he is so incredibly famous.

I’ll also add that as long as Louis is with Simon Jones PR, who are connected to 1D, I will have doubt that he is completely free of old contractual obligations regarding his public image. Contracts can and do control public image beyond the duration of someone’s actual work. They can’t control someone’s real life, but they can control what the public sees. (There’s good reason these contracts are heavily criticized. They’re fucking inhumane.) So we don’t know what Louis is actually allowed to do without getting sued into the ground right now. And SJPR isn’t a good sign.

Finally, I have probably said this a million times now, but if I were advising Louis, I would encourage him to use any intended changes in his public dating life strategically to support his career. In other words: stunts are for PR, so use them for PR. And that would mean continuing things as normal until it was time for those changes to happen. Suddenly changing your entire public image and stoking the flames of multiple public scandals, all while having nothing to promote, is a terrible idea for anyone with a career that requires public life. It may hurt, but the best choice in the long run is to make sure everything rolls out in a controlled manner. And we have no idea what issues he may be facing in doing that when it comes to relationships with the media, so it may also take time to keep secrets from people who would sell him out in a heartbeat while finding good people who are willing and able to handle his story.

At the end of the day, though, Harry and Louis have been doing this job for a decade. They grew up together in this bizarre situation. They’ve found ways to stay strong together. While we all want to see good things happen for them, we have to be patient. No one here suffers more from their situation than they do, and I think that’s important to remember. They’re navigating a lot. And for the time being, it’s up to us to see and support them. Our support can change a lot for them, we just have to have the patience to see it through.

Anyway, I was looking for a cute gif to end this with but instead these two came up separately so here, scream with me:

🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻 (source)

Niall Horan Wins a Pop Award for “Nice to Meet Ya” | 2020 BMI London Awards

New Holivia Deuxmoi submission. No pics, of course. Laugh with me.

Ugh, my eyes just rolled back so hard.

This sounds like it’s about last weekend (?) at Soho Farmhouse (?). They’re keeping the “let’s make this super believable” streak. Can this movie come out already so this stunt can be over?

I’m not aware of any Ferraris Harry owns in the UK. Here are his cars.

Harry performing Watermelon Sugar at the Grammys 2021.

THIS HURT ME

i WILL cry about it

The shirtless selfies with bed head hair, and then later Louis confirms that he sleeps either in boxers or naked didn't help. I mean, were the selfies for us, or to tease the curly one?

A post about jealous Harry

Alternatively: In which Louis’ husband morphs into an actual murderer upon feeling jealous

But why have I taken so long to decide on making a jealous harry post i mean like the distinct brow furrow annihilates my soul 

followed by that reassured *squeeze* and *pat* *pat* though

like we get it Harry, he’s yours

AU: Where Aiden playfully pecks Louis’ neck whilst embracing

and Harry get’s jeal- oh

never mind.

That thigh tap is only necessary if you’re one of those jealous boyfriends……and Harry is DEFINITELY one of those people.

How to Make: Harry Styles mentally plot a successful murder against Liam Payne

Step 1: Hold Louis Tomlinson’s hand. Step 2: Wait for Harry to plot and carry out the murder.

Now this is debatable, but Harry says “stop it” to Zayn ????????

I mean a human being and Louis cannot even so much as socialise without Harry stepping forth to break it up.

Self-explanatory: Harry will have no wieners (other than his own) invading within Louis’ personal space 

If one was to stumble across Harry’s assassination list, the first five dot points would look a lil’ somethin’ like:

Zayn Malik

zayn

ZAYN

ZaYN MALIK

Malik, Zayn

Then the next five points would be Liam

Harry

needs

to

chill

When u anticipate inevitable cock-blockage;

My god, that eyebrow crease could kill the poor man

But Corden should have known; I mean he’s playing on Harry’s turf, he should have seen it coming

Niall didn’t see it coming

Damn Harry’s face drops from 100 to 0 real quick

Louis coped it that night let me tell you

Harry’s internal thoughts: I think there’s a serrated butter knife in the dressing room backstage..

Most of you don’t know this -it’s kept under heavy wraps-, but Harry actually brutally murdered Liam that night, it’s true. The Liam Payne we see today is a mere holographic image now.

Oh, and Zayn didn’t leave by choice, but by threatened force from Louis’ husband.

I think we can all accept this is some low-key jealously but it’s not the reason I’m adding this at all tbh.

I’m adding this because I find it interesting how its almost Harry’s life duty to personally witness and note every single mere contraction of a limb and/or muscle, along with each tendon that moves in Louis’ body; Like even a fucking eyelash twitch you look over and yep Harry saw the lash convulsion

Now this is just getting too comical because I bet you after this interview, Harry gathered the band in a room and explained the guidelines and conditions one must always follow during their wake. The first rule was probably, ‘one must never sit on Louis’ lap if they wish to keep their kneecaps in order to sit again’, Or you know, something along those lines.

Remember the lovebite interview where the interviewer asks if they give each other them “from within the band?” and Liam immediately steps in to avert potential Larry-ness from happening by stuttering out, “Louis gives me these” but then Harry kind of 

It’s a wonder how after all these years, Harry still hasn’t popped a nerve from all that facial straining like w o w

Can we top it off with this because thumb signs are important and Harry’s kitten fond kills me and Louis’ serious and in-loveness kills me too

I hate married couples.

Hope!! Tell us what this means! 😩😂

Hi!!!! okay so i’m incredibly happy with this decision for him to sign with BMG. and honestly it makes a lot of sense as that label is built off the foundation of a lot of his beliefs regarding artists and the music industry. they have pretty well known artists atop their roster such as john legend, lewis capaldi, blink-182, bruno mars, bring me the horizon, run the jewels etc., etc. and they have a reputation of helping their artists flourish in ways that give the artist a sense of control and direction. yes, a record label is a record label, but there’s a few who actually feel like they work alongside their artists instead of over them and BMG is one of those.

he publicly isnt tied to any sony branch anymore under his solo career/name and every music/creative project going forward will be devoid of any sony affiliations.

also if you want to understand more of the mantra BMG stands behind this is how they describe themselves on their website ✨