Googling Shit Like "why Do I Feel Bad After Hanging Out With My Friends" And All Of The Answers Are Either

googling shit like "why do i feel bad after hanging out with my friends" and all of the answers are either "you need better friends" (i don't; my friends are wonderful) or "your social battery is drained, you need to rest and regain your energy levels" (i don't; i've got tons of energy, it's just manifesting as over-the-top neurotic mania). why is this even happening. it's like some stupid toll i have to pay as a punishment for enjoying myself too much

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i-would-like-to-leave

2 months ago

ur first and last recent emojis are ur gender now. mine is 🅱👨‍❤‍💋‍👨

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never could have anticipated this what even am I

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i-would-like-to-leave

3 months ago

put three f/f ships you like in the tags. doesnt matter how obscure or embarrassing the media, go for it. and no, your m/m ship doesnt count as women

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franmaya JuniThena heesoo

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i-would-like-to-leave

2 months ago

DELETE THIS POST

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i-would-like-to-leave

4 months ago

Digital fanart for Omniscient reader's viewpoint. It's a series of black and white illustrations making out a single monologue through their accompanying text.
"I suppose, in a sense".
Kim Dokja looking at something under his feet. His face is hidden under a heavy shadow with only a single eye and a crack running across his face visible. Behind his head there's a disc of a halo crumbling away on a background of pitch black sky.

"I'm also a writer"
A shot of Kim Dokja from the back. He is standing on a path made out of screens-tiles, each depicting a scene. Closest to him are a scene of his companions calling out to him and a scene of unconcious Yoo Joonghyuk sleeping somewhere. Further aways, disappearing in the dark, are two female silhouettes, possibly Lee Sookyung and Han Sooyoung back on Earth.

"Worse than a proper one"
Two bright white parallel lines - two bridges extend into the dark, never getting close. Kim Dokja stands close to the lower edge of the art, watching someone standing on the other path far away, also wearing a white coat.

"With my hands accustomed to turning pages"
The text sits in the screen of Kim Dokja's phone held by his crumbling hands.

"Not filling them"
That text, in contrast, is printed on a stack of pages held by different hands, with painted black nails and different type of scars.

"My heart as well"
A close up of Kim Dokja's face, looking down. There is no heavy shadow over his face, yet his mouth are not drawn. Despite that, his eyes look dull, sad.

"Accustomed to seeing"
A reflection of younger Kim Dokja in an old pc screen. He looks down, just as sad and disheartened as his older self. There are pages visible on the screen.

"But not participating"
A shot from inside the train carrier. Hands claw at the closed doors, leaving bloody traces on the glass. It's Kim Dokja's crumbling hands. Behind the glass there is a night sky.

"Maybe that is why"
Kim Dokja is sitting on a train seat with his legs, looking to the right. He is wearing his stark wjite coat, and looks empty. He is surrounded by an empty void, all alone in the space he is in.

"Their expressions are hard to pin down"
A mirror image of the previous one, but this Kim Dokja is looking at his companions, who surround him. They all sit on grass, with a darkening sky above them. Still, all the faces of Kim Dokja's companions are hidden as if drawn over with a pen.

"If i never experience that strong of a feeling"
Kim Dokja at the end of the 1863 arc, from the back, hunched down with his black wings framing his back. His horns are crumbling, and so does the black star of a constellation above his head.

"How can i put it on a page?"
A mirror image of Kim Dokja from the first page - but now it's Han Sooyoung looking down on Kim Dokja with her face hidden under a heavy shadow, her expression impossible to pin down. She is wearing a bright white coat.

"A story written by someone that inadequate"
A page almost fully black. In the upper left corner, there is barely visible figure of young Han Sooyoung in front of a computer screen, typing. On her chair there's barely visible hand of the Dokkaebi king. Only whatever is bathed in the light of the screen is visible.

"Surely it's not a read you would approve of"
A similarly almost completely black page. In contrats with the text, a happy Kim Dokja, visible in the light of his phone, sits in a hospital bed. An IV drip is visible next to him, with the bags going from seemingly normal one to Story fluid the higher they sit.
Full text says:
"I suppose, in a sense... I'm also a writer, worse than a proper one, with my hands accustomed to turning pages, not filling them. My heart, as well, accustomed to seeing, but not participating. Maybe that is why their expressions are hard to pin down. If i never experience that strong of a feeling, how can i put it on a page? A story written by someone that inadequate... Surely it's not a read you would approve of."

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i-would-like-to-leave

4 months ago

happy birthday!

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i-would-like-to-leave

4 months ago

i think more modern aus should commit to trying to translate yoohankims batshit neuroses about each other to a non-apocalyptic scenario. i love an au where kim dokja was yoo joonghyuk's first watcher when he started streaming with han sooyoung as his mod and han sooyoung makes yoo joonghyuk stream every night to make sure kim dokja keeps watching and doesnt kill himself and theyre both doing it for him but of course they both get in simultaneous dramatic car accidents that gives them both amnesia so they forget kim dokja was their first watcher. but he stays a fan for 13 years (and gets into internet beef with han sooyoung in the meantime) and then they all meet dramatically. so kim dokja manipulates the shit out of yoo joonghyuk to make his twitch channel blow up even more 'for his own good' while also engaging in psychosexual mind games with han sooyoung until he fakes his own death and runs away with his biological daughter (via bihyung obvs) and han sooyoung and yoo joonghyuk (who have forgotten each other too but realise their shared backstory over the course of the journey) have to hunt him down and confess their love. and its a coffee shop au btw

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i-would-like-to-leave

3 months ago

han sooyoong 1863rd round

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so good

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i-would-like-to-leave

2 months ago

Whumpril Day 5 - Neglect

On ao3

Sponsors were staples of the Star Stream. Nearly every powerful Incarnation had one, sometimes more. They were meant to bestow legendary Stigmas upon their chosen, granting them fantastical abilities to allow them to progress further through the Scenarios.

Shin Yoosung signed that contract with the strange Ahjussi knowing this. She signed it knowing that he may not help her as much as others might, but she had faith he would be worth it.

She did not sign the contract knowing that the man would disappear so soon. She did not sign the contract knowing that the man would never come back.

She felt empty. The memories she had with that man were short, fleeting. It felt she had spent more time with the man dead than she had spent with him alive. She knew this wasn’t true, but his absence was all consuming.

Sponsors were meant to aid those they took on as Incarnations. Even though she was a child, she knew that this was not always true… this man was meant to be different. This man was meant to stay.

[The Constellation ‘Demon King of Salvation’ does not exist]

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orv kim dokja shin yoosung neglect whumpril2025 whumprilday5 tw abandonment

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i-would-like-to-leave

1 month ago