“Look At Me, I’m A Grad Student! I’m Thirty Years Old And I Made Six Hundred Dollars Last Year!”

When the Spectrum™ people at the grocery store try to stop me and sell me subpar internet service, I've made a habit of replying "I'm already on the spectrum!"

“i’m not the same as who i was before [x] thing happened to me” does it help to know that you would not have stayed that person regardless

I heard some schools in the eastern US are closing today.

I guess the kids' education has been...

eclipsed by other concerns! 🥁

it's belly o'clock

> send a word in my askbox i’ll respond with a related joke

fern!

you know I don’t think I know enough about them to write a good joke…

I guess I gotta read some fern facts!

The road to heaven is paved with MALICE 😈

I like to imagine that Senshi isn't acting that different as an Elf, its just coming across different bevause of his looks.

I like to imagine this is how other Dwarves see him, a delicate pretty boy. It's just other races can't read Dwarf body language that well.

Then he's an elf and suddenly they see his mannerisms in a different light, but he's always been this way. They just didn't have Dwarf Goggles.

Like how other Half Foots instantly clock middle aged Chilchuck but everyone else thinks uwu baby

An undertaker's favorite foods are gravey, dirt pudding, and Tombstone pizza

Why are undertakers always so tired?

Because they’re always taking graveyard shifts!