When They Get Married Who Cries Harder

yo ho homosexual

I think as someone with OCD I relate to Baz so much because in many ways vampirism is similar to OCD.

Having intrusive thoughts about hurting others despite it being very upsetting?

Being ashamed of having those thoughts because no one understands and will shun you?

Having compulsions (drinking blood) you hide from others that only temporarily quells those thoughts?

Hating yourself for these thoughts and thinking it makes you evil?

Isolating yourself from others so they don’t find out that you’re a monster?

Ultimately those thoughts do not making you a monster because you are not your thoughts, and it doesn’t mean you actually want to act on them?

he’s just like me fr (responsible homosexual older sister who’s afraid of breaking the rules. Somehow still the problem child even though they try so hard not to be. High functioning depression & anxiety. Feels like everything is constantly their fault.)

IS BAZ A SMOKER?

I just got a private ask about this, and thought I may as well answer it here.

No, Baz is not a smoker. (In canon.) I thought I was making it clear in Carry On that he only smokes a cigarette at the vampire club to intimidate Nico. (Because vampires are so flammable, none of them smoke. It makes Baz seem fearless.) Elsewhere in Carry On, Baz says his dad drew a hard line against smoking. (The flammable thing again.) The most compelling evidence that Baz isn’t a regular smoker is that Simon is surprised by Baz’s cigarette at the vampire club. “I didn’t know he smoked.” Simon has been following Baz around for eight years, inhaling him as much as possible. If Baz was smoking regularly, Simon would have noticed. (Also, if Baz were a regular smoker, I feel like we would have seen him light up in that book on many stressful occasions.)

Never not thinking about all of them, honestly. Even so many books away from them.

So beautiful, I want this as tiles or a bandana

@iamamythologicalcreature mentioned seeing this snowbaz print I made in blue so here it is :) 🩵🤍💙

Chapter 23: Revives Me

Hello! I’m sorry the last time I posted a chapter was OVER A MONTH ago but I bring penance in the form of the longest chapter of On The Rocks, a 13k epic.

This chapter has the same TWs as OTR generally, but specifically I will note it contains suicidal ideation, references to fresh scars, and explicit dealing in alcoholic withdrawal and recovery.

In addition to @rbkzz my wonderful beta, I also want to give a huge thank you to @artsyunderstudy, but you need to read the chapter to find out why. 😉

Without further ado, Chapter 23: Revives Me

@alexalexinii @asocialpessimist @aristocratic-otter @arthurkko @stitchy-queerista @skee3000 @whatevertheweather @wellbelesbian @emjaydellyone @edenalix @emeryhall @run-for-chamo-miles @roomwithanopenfire @raenestee @angelsfalling16 @thewholelemon @twinkle-twinkle-up-above @theearlgreymage @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @youarenevertooold @ic3que3n @iamamythologicalcreature @ileadacharmedlife @orange-peony @palimpsessed @prettygoododds @pacey-bunce-loves-joey @drowninginships @diamondmeadow @fiend-for-culture @facewithoutheart @hushed-chorus @kaaaaaaarf @lonleyhumanbeing @letraspal @cosmicalart @confused-bi-queer @cutestkilla @beastmonstertitan @bookish-bogwitch @ninemagicks @nausikaaa @nightimedreamersworld @nextblood @messofthejess @monbons @mooncello

“I was eleven years old, and I’d lost my mother, and my soul, and the Crucible gave me you.”

—Baz Pitch, Carry On, Epilogue, pg. 506

“He still looks like something I want to eat.”